Thin @ MindSay

the holidays make me feel even more fat... and not just the food part.  People give me clothing that is too large and it hurts.  I mean honestly do I look that big to you?  I hope not.  I feel so disgusting inside and out.  I have been thinking lately about my odd habits.  I used to (and I still do often) discount my unusual behavior as normal. 
Examples: 

    *I'm just picky
    *I don't purge every day (and then I did so it became...)
    *I don't purge more than once a day (but then I did...)
    *I don't purge everything I eat
    *I'm not really purging just um... rinsing my stomach
    *I'm not starving myself!  I just can't eat too much because it makes me want to purge!
The stomach rinsing is probably the oddest thing right?  Basically that is when I drink a lot of water and then vomit and repeat the process till I get only water followed by bile and of course streaks of blood from my throat.  Disgusting no?  It is... satisfying though.   I can't say it exactly feels good but there is an awesome sense of relief involved. 

I really don't want to lose my hair.  I'm not anywhere near a weight that would cause that to happen... but I haven't stopped this shit despite health complications more serious than hair loss so I don't know.  Am I going to stop?  Well so far I'm just taking vitamins and supplements.  To be honest though one of the pills is supposed to speed my metabolism and another is a stimulant to give me energy.  Should I just sleep more and eat better?  Yes.  Will I?  No probably not. 

NEWSFLASH:

 

Thighs are meant to be bigger than calves. It's a balance thing. It's a genetic thing. It's a HUMAN thing. Girls, if your thighs are no bigger than your calves or arms, you're TOO FREAKING THIN. If your legs cannot meet at any point whatsoever, you're TOO FREAKING THIN.

 

Eat something. Please.

That is the question posed for the mammas out there today from me! 

 

 I, myself, am a MILF! For those of you who do not know what MILF stands for:  Mother I would like to Fuck!  Simply because I am NOT ashamed of my streach marks, my sagging bobbies, or even my paunchy belly!  You know why?  I see them as battle scars of 10 months (that 9 month crap is bull!) of back to back pregnancies!  I got this great lil, if not destructive, life force that is always going to be apart of my life.  My children carry on a peice of my spirit, my essence, and my soul even after I die!  They will always be around even when they or I am being an idiot! 

 

Sure I want and made a deal with Randy if I go back down to my graduation weight from highschool, he would splurge on a tummy tuck for me.  Simply because no matter how much weight I loose, thanks to having back to back kids my stomach muscles were pulled apart and away from their support.  Thus I have the paunch of a belly.  But you know what I am going to be doing the hard part with out surgery.  And that is working to define my already sexy thick curves and dropping not only weight but inches and clothes sizes.  Did I mention I only have 30 or so more lbs to lose?  But the deal was I might have to wait a bit on my tummy tuck even after I make my goal!  Why?  Because bills, kids, and other things come before a $3,000 dollar to $10,000 dollar elective surgery!  Those prices all depend on where you live.  See I have done my research already!

 

What is a Yummy Mommy?  Well some folks out there are saying this in place of a MILF.  What they don't understand is a MILF was a WILF before she became a MILF!  A woman I would like to fuck.  To me, WILF's and MILF's are far sexier then any woman or man that has to go in for plastic surgery on an already perfect body.  I don't want to be a Yummy Mommy!  And I am far from looking like Mrs. Doubtfire like so many women are claiming to start looking like after having kids and then even before their body is completely healed from havnig a baby and even trying to loose the weight naturally are going in for face lifts, tummy tucks, lazer treatments, or even complete body lifts!  Tell ya what!  I want folks to know that I am a Mamma!  Why would I want to look like some starving scrawny person who can't find decent clothes in the woman's section but has to go to their pre teen daughter's sectoin at the store?  Sure if your naturally small and thin it is one thing but to try to keep up with your daughters and sons in the looks department, the "cool department" and the behavor department is just lame in my eyes.

 

People need to be happy with what the Gods and Goddesses gave them!  And becoming a mamma and having your body turn to shit on you is one of the things they gave you.  Sure some women are naturally inclined to go back to their thin bodies never looking like they gained a lb!  Like my cousin Joe's wife, Kirstin!  That woman irritates me on many levels but you know what I don't begrudge her late 30 year old ass one bit for being a small stature, average size woman who has had 4 children.  Yes four children and still looks like she has not birthed one child at all.  Nor do I begrudge my cousin Tom's wife for having the same amount of children and still looking thin and good looking!  You know why?  Because they work hard at being a mother and wife and they take the time to do for themselves.  Just like I will give Kirsten and Kari a lot of credit, they both have looked at me with my medium sized body build with large muscle mass and tell me I am looking dayum good with my curves!  And I have more energy then a lot of folks that are smaller then even them and can keep up with not only my children, but my husband (hell I run Randy ragged most of hte time) and still work hard at trying to become healthy!  I know for a dayum fact I will never be a scrawny thing!  I wasn't born that way!

 

I was almost a 10lb baby, I was thin and rowdy as a kid but as soon as puberty hit in the 5th grade I got curves.  My hips and ass popped out, my boobs were only about a C cup and then boom after having 2 kids and multiple miscarriages I am now a D to DD cup depending on who makes the bra.  And no matter how much weight I loose my cup size hasn't gone down!  That is a genetic trait handed to me by both my grandmothers!  I also have a genetic trait of a deeply but straight curved spine and a rib cage that protrudes more then other folks causing the family tummy.  As a teenager I thought I was fat and now looking back at my year books I was thin with a tiny tummy and HOT.  I am still HOT just have a little bit more to me to love!

 

What am I getting at?  Simply put I know it is hard to age.  I know it is hard to have babies seperatly giving your body time to heal, back to back or in multiples!  But be happy with your body because you only get one!  Sure a lil body work for those who are in actual need of it.......like those women who have multiple babies and their tummy's just look terrible now from all the loose skin even after loosing the weight, those women who are predisposed like myself to have a lil paunch at all times and now their paunch is some what gone and you have loose muscles and skin.........but you know what folks take your time and don't get the work done just because you feel insecure with what your body looks like right after having a baby!  Did you all know that it takes 5 years after each birth for your womb and your innards to actually heal completely?  You all thought tribal folks were crazy for not spitting out a kid every year or two!  Well got news for you all, tribal folks thought us European folks were jsut as crazy for putting our bodies through that pain and suffering and causing the women great danger in having back to back kids!  Work at being a mom first by taking the time to loose the weight, tighten up what you can and paying you bills.

 

Yummy Mommy's take out loans, dont' pay their bills, or put their family in a money crunch because instead of telling the world to take them as they are and being happy with how they look and realizing they are no longer carefree kids they are feeding into socieities need of having perfect bodies!  I got news for you all, I rather see the models look like Marylinn and Betty Page then Naomie and Katie!

 

So are you a Yummy Mommy or a MILF?

Curvier women 'will live longer'

Catherine Zeta Jones is famed for her healthy figure.
Curvy women are more likely to live longer than their slimmer counterparts, researchers have found.
Institute of Preventative Medicine in Copenhagen researchers found those with wider hips also appeared to be protected against heart conditions.

Women with a hip measurement smaller than 40 inches, or a size 14 would not have this protection, they said.

The researchers say hip fat contains a beneficial natural anti-inflammatory.

Narrow hips 'detrimental'.

They said this anti-inflammatory, called adiponectin, prevents arteries swelling up and becoming blocked.

Fat on hips is different than fat on the abdomen.

Dr Berit Heitmann, Institute of Preventative Medicine.

The hourglass figure has been made famous by women ranging from Marilyn Monroe and Sophia Loren to Kelly Brook and Catherine Zeta Jones today.

The Danish researchers examined almost 3,000 men and women aged between 35 and 65 from 1987 to 1988.

They measured height, weight and body mass index - calculated by dividing weight in kilograms by the square of your height in metres.

They then looked at Danish health registers up until the end of 1998 to look at how many of the men and women had cardiovascular problems, and up to 2001 to see how many had died.

Compared to the group of women with the smallest hip circumferences, women with the biggest were found to have an 87% reduction in deaths.

They also had an 86% reduced risk of having coronary heart disease and a 46% reduction in the risk of developing cardiovascular disease, according to the researchers.

Previous studies have found both men and women with small hips are at an increased risk of developing diabetes, high blood pressure and gall bladder disease.

However the study, which has been published in Obesity Research, found a wider hip circumference was not linked with better heart health in men.

'Apple-shape' risk

Professor Berit Heitmann, who led the study, said: "It seems that the protection is not a matter of wide hips, it's the detrimental effect of narrow hips with a lack of muscle fat, or bone or a combination of both.

She added: "Fat on hips is different than fat on the abdomen. If you do not have enough of this fat you may risk heart attacks."

Carrying excess fat around the stomach, being 'apple shaped', is already known to be potentially damaging to health.

Fat cells in this part of the body pump out chemicals that can damage the insulin system, raising the risk of diabetes and heart disease.

Belinda Linden, of the British Heart Foundation said: "It has been widely reported that if you are apple-shaped, your risk of developing cardiovascular disease is likely to be greater than if you are pear-shaped.

"This study provides additional evidence of the association between hip circumference and cardiovascular protection among women."

But she added: "It is important to consider both your body weight and shape in tandem. Controlling both by eating less and being more active is the best way to reduce your risk of heart and circulatory disease."