The World @ MindSay 
This needs no introduction.
Have you ever found yourself dumbfounded with emotion? Have you ever been truly, sincerely at a loss for words? I'm finding that i'm reaching for words a lot lately, i cant seem to put the way i feel into a tangible form. "Loved", "Happy", "Ecstatic", "Head-Over-Heels", "Lucky", "Unbelievably Fortunate" are only words that scratch the surface of what i'm going through.
No one wants to read sappy things about another person's boyfriend or girlfriend... but fuck it, im gonna write it down anyway.
She does things for me that catch me so off guard, i almost dont know how to react to them. A few weeks ago, when we first started "officially" dating, she set up a HUGE surprise for me- she made reservations for us at my favorite restaurant of all time (which isn't cheap to eat at either), and she told them to change the napkins to my favorite shade of "toxic green". Unfortunately... i didn't go. She didn't tell me that she made plans, but she insisted that i come see her at work at a certain time... on that time, i had made plans to go see a friend before she left for college. When i found out, i felt like a TOTAL ass. She tried so hard to impress me and make me feel good, and i didn't go through with it. But here's the stunning part- she didn't make a big deal out of it at all, she said (and meant) that it was ok, and she understood i had other things to do. I'm sorry, but i have yet to find even the best of friends that wouldn't make a big stink out of a deal like that.
When we first started seeing eachother, she used to always wear a locket around her neck- a small, silver, heart-shaped locket that she ALWAYS had with her at all times. It was a locket that her grandmother gave her when she was little, and no one had ever opened it... ever. She never let anyone touch it, let alone have it leave her possession. So what does she do? She dries out the rose petals from the flowers i gave her the day i asked her out... then puts them in a small box... lays the locket on top... and gives it to me.
She said it represented her heart, and that she wanted me to have it. I was on the verge of tears when she said that to me, she gave me something so incredibly important and irreplaceable... because she loved me. If any of you have followed me long enough, you know that i absolutely hate to receive anything of value or worth and not give in return- it just doesn't feel right.
Tonight, while i was at work, i got a text asking me about my favorite candy... i put two and two together and knew she was planning on something, i had plans to see her on wednesday so i thought she may surprise me with that... WRONG.
She was just leaving her Powercore training/workout when i first called her, and i talked to her for nearly half an hour on the phone walking around the mall. At one point, it got really fuzzy and distorted, i thought she got out of her car and went inside or something. I thought nothing of it and kept walking... out of nowhere, she asked, "where are you right now?" in her usual curious voice. I told her i was on my way back to the store, and she hung up. Naturally, i did the classic "wtf?" face looking at my phone. When i looked up, she was right in front of me smiling ear to ear. She wrapped her arms around me and gave me a warm hug and an inviting kiss, she seemed so incredibly happy to see me!
I sat and talked to her for about 15 minutes, then i headed upstairs to brush my teeth and walk back downstairs. Once i got done, i walked back downstairs and said goodbye... i told her i was a little tired and i missed her, i couldn't wait for wednesday, i love you, so on and so forth. The rest of the night dragged on, and finally it was time to leave at 10pm. As i punched out, i went to pick up my coat... and it felt like there was a lead weight in it. I couldn't figure out what the hell was wrong- until i turned the coat around. She found her way to my coat on the hanger, stuffed the pocket closest to the wall with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, and left me a card with a big heart on it. Talk about an instant picker-upper and heart warmer, right?
The card had a big, smiling face on the front, which read "You fill me up with smiles..." and on the inside, it said "And i'm not talking regular-sized ones, im talking JUMBO!!!" (kind of corny, but i loved it.) She wrote on the inside, "Hey Hun, I saw this card and instantly thought of you! I love you! Dont get sick eating all the candy!" Of course, she signed it with a heart with "always" written in the middle... instant heart melter.
Most people would look at this and say "she brought you candy, big deal.", but it's much more than that. She planned it out, and made an effort to brighten my night. She could have just given it to me and walked out... but no, she found a way to make it absolutely adorable and memorable.
After i found the candy, i called her to thank her... and found myself dumbfounded- just like i mentioned earlier. I couldn't find a way to tell her how much that meant to me and how happy she made me, so i struggled for a few seconds then finally got it out. The kicker- she told me that she always feels loved when she is with me, and that she absolutely loves being around me. Whenever i see her, i know for a fact she means it- she smiles big and hugs me tightly, she always gives me little kisses when we're close, and all the cute little things she does to show affection that most people would take for granted... i dunno how i got so unimaginably lucky, but this girl is the best thing that has ever happened to me... and i mean that. There are a million other things i could go on and talk about that she's done... but i think i've made my point.
I truly, honestly love this girl with every little strand of DNA that i have... she constantly makes me feel loved, wanted, and appreciated- nothing i ever do goes unnoticed with her. She's selfless, caring, and is as loving as could be- and i wouldn't trade the world for her... not on my life.
~O~
No one wants to read sappy things about another person's boyfriend or girlfriend... but fuck it, im gonna write it down anyway.
She does things for me that catch me so off guard, i almost dont know how to react to them. A few weeks ago, when we first started "officially" dating, she set up a HUGE surprise for me- she made reservations for us at my favorite restaurant of all time (which isn't cheap to eat at either), and she told them to change the napkins to my favorite shade of "toxic green". Unfortunately... i didn't go. She didn't tell me that she made plans, but she insisted that i come see her at work at a certain time... on that time, i had made plans to go see a friend before she left for college. When i found out, i felt like a TOTAL ass. She tried so hard to impress me and make me feel good, and i didn't go through with it. But here's the stunning part- she didn't make a big deal out of it at all, she said (and meant) that it was ok, and she understood i had other things to do. I'm sorry, but i have yet to find even the best of friends that wouldn't make a big stink out of a deal like that.
When we first started seeing eachother, she used to always wear a locket around her neck- a small, silver, heart-shaped locket that she ALWAYS had with her at all times. It was a locket that her grandmother gave her when she was little, and no one had ever opened it... ever. She never let anyone touch it, let alone have it leave her possession. So what does she do? She dries out the rose petals from the flowers i gave her the day i asked her out... then puts them in a small box... lays the locket on top... and gives it to me.
She said it represented her heart, and that she wanted me to have it. I was on the verge of tears when she said that to me, she gave me something so incredibly important and irreplaceable... because she loved me. If any of you have followed me long enough, you know that i absolutely hate to receive anything of value or worth and not give in return- it just doesn't feel right.
Tonight, while i was at work, i got a text asking me about my favorite candy... i put two and two together and knew she was planning on something, i had plans to see her on wednesday so i thought she may surprise me with that... WRONG.
She was just leaving her Powercore training/workout when i first called her, and i talked to her for nearly half an hour on the phone walking around the mall. At one point, it got really fuzzy and distorted, i thought she got out of her car and went inside or something. I thought nothing of it and kept walking... out of nowhere, she asked, "where are you right now?" in her usual curious voice. I told her i was on my way back to the store, and she hung up. Naturally, i did the classic "wtf?" face looking at my phone. When i looked up, she was right in front of me smiling ear to ear. She wrapped her arms around me and gave me a warm hug and an inviting kiss, she seemed so incredibly happy to see me!
I sat and talked to her for about 15 minutes, then i headed upstairs to brush my teeth and walk back downstairs. Once i got done, i walked back downstairs and said goodbye... i told her i was a little tired and i missed her, i couldn't wait for wednesday, i love you, so on and so forth. The rest of the night dragged on, and finally it was time to leave at 10pm. As i punched out, i went to pick up my coat... and it felt like there was a lead weight in it. I couldn't figure out what the hell was wrong- until i turned the coat around. She found her way to my coat on the hanger, stuffed the pocket closest to the wall with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, and left me a card with a big heart on it. Talk about an instant picker-upper and heart warmer, right?
The card had a big, smiling face on the front, which read "You fill me up with smiles..." and on the inside, it said "And i'm not talking regular-sized ones, im talking JUMBO!!!" (kind of corny, but i loved it.) She wrote on the inside, "Hey Hun, I saw this card and instantly thought of you! I love you! Dont get sick eating all the candy!" Of course, she signed it with a heart with "always" written in the middle... instant heart melter.
Most people would look at this and say "she brought you candy, big deal.", but it's much more than that. She planned it out, and made an effort to brighten my night. She could have just given it to me and walked out... but no, she found a way to make it absolutely adorable and memorable.
After i found the candy, i called her to thank her... and found myself dumbfounded- just like i mentioned earlier. I couldn't find a way to tell her how much that meant to me and how happy she made me, so i struggled for a few seconds then finally got it out. The kicker- she told me that she always feels loved when she is with me, and that she absolutely loves being around me. Whenever i see her, i know for a fact she means it- she smiles big and hugs me tightly, she always gives me little kisses when we're close, and all the cute little things she does to show affection that most people would take for granted... i dunno how i got so unimaginably lucky, but this girl is the best thing that has ever happened to me... and i mean that. There are a million other things i could go on and talk about that she's done... but i think i've made my point.
I truly, honestly love this girl with every little strand of DNA that i have... she constantly makes me feel loved, wanted, and appreciated- nothing i ever do goes unnoticed with her. She's selfless, caring, and is as loving as could be- and i wouldn't trade the world for her... not on my life.
~O~
."We called it 'the Absinthe of the Ages.'"
.A lot of people have this dream of a perfect, ideal life. In this dream world, there is a comfortable, cottage-style house, flowers under the windows, a bright green lawn, a strong, business oriented father-figure and his supportive but docile wife. And, of course, there are always the kids. Two, perfect children... All of this exists behind a white picket fence. As long as you are behind that fence, you're safe. The only thing that could make the fantasy even more perfect would be equally perfect neighbors who also live peacefully behind their own white picket fence. But there could be no neighbors. Nor could a neighborhood even exist. The world doesn't live behind a white picket fence. And, naturally, it could never conform to the idea of what, in essence, is "natural". Nature defies the plan we set for it because we never should have set a plan in the first place. It rebels. Husband and wife argue. Children cry out in vain. Neighbors are never the best of neighbors. Ultimately, the peaceful world falls apart because its citizens ask too much. Life isn't safe. The danger lies behind the white picket fence. Living outside the fence is the only way to shield yourself from the fall of Rome.
Do Not Love The World
The small groups guy where I work told me the other day that when he asked his wife what she would take with her should their house catch on fire--except for their kids, of course--she said, "My dad's journal."
Ok. Confession time. I tried writing a journal several years ago and didn't care for it. It seemed to me too much like a diary. However, I've decided to start anew, and this time, I'm writing it with my grandchildren in view. Each child will get a year's worth of grandpa's journal. Its pages will contain the wondrous things that the Lord has shown me or spoken to me about. Therefore, it won't have an entry every day. And it won't contain any words about the mundane dealings of the day.
The entry for today will be something that Laurie shared with me. In his first letter, the apostle John tells us this: "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him."
Seems pretty straightforward, doesn't it? In fact, as Laurie pointed out, it's a command--do not love the world.
It's a command.
Let's tread carefully here. Too often, our thoughts turn to legalistic prescriptions when we read such words. However, there is no way you can muster up in yourself an "anti-love-for-the-world" frame of mind. That's a good thing. If you did, you would be very proud of it. No, you must ask the Lord to give you a love for Him that will begin to edge out your love for this present world. This makes sense, doesn't it? What is the best way to make your marriage adultery proof? By dedicating yourself to never associate with a member of the opposite sex? No. The best way is to have a strong, intimate, caring, selfless love for your spouse. It is no different in our relationship with our God.
Ask Him for the love that you desperately need for Him. He will give you that love. Then you will begin to notice those things in the world that have a disproportinately large footprint in your heart--and you will want to remove them.
Do not love the world. If you do, the love of the Father is not in you. The answer for not loving the world is loving God more--with a love that He will gladly give you.
Ok. Confession time. I tried writing a journal several years ago and didn't care for it. It seemed to me too much like a diary. However, I've decided to start anew, and this time, I'm writing it with my grandchildren in view. Each child will get a year's worth of grandpa's journal. Its pages will contain the wondrous things that the Lord has shown me or spoken to me about. Therefore, it won't have an entry every day. And it won't contain any words about the mundane dealings of the day.
The entry for today will be something that Laurie shared with me. In his first letter, the apostle John tells us this: "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him."
Seems pretty straightforward, doesn't it? In fact, as Laurie pointed out, it's a command--do not love the world.
It's a command.
Let's tread carefully here. Too often, our thoughts turn to legalistic prescriptions when we read such words. However, there is no way you can muster up in yourself an "anti-love-for-the-world" frame of mind. That's a good thing. If you did, you would be very proud of it. No, you must ask the Lord to give you a love for Him that will begin to edge out your love for this present world. This makes sense, doesn't it? What is the best way to make your marriage adultery proof? By dedicating yourself to never associate with a member of the opposite sex? No. The best way is to have a strong, intimate, caring, selfless love for your spouse. It is no different in our relationship with our God.
Ask Him for the love that you desperately need for Him. He will give you that love. Then you will begin to notice those things in the world that have a disproportinately large footprint in your heart--and you will want to remove them.
Do not love the world. If you do, the love of the Father is not in you. The answer for not loving the world is loving God more--with a love that He will gladly give you.
WHATEVER...
I am just sitting here at work reading through peoples blogs wondering...
"Why do people think they are better than someone else, simply because they use big words, or are artsy?"
I have gone through several theories in my head... none of which have come with a viable answer. I shake my head, thinking, do I judge people in this way?... I hope not.
I myself, know that when I blog, it is just as simple as my online diary, or sometimes a rant of what is going on in my world... sometimes, someone asks me to write about something... I had requests to post some of my poems and lyrics, sometimes as easy as a joke, and like my life... a mindsay friend asked me to write about my life so they could have a little insight as to who I am as a person. We all have the freedom to express ourselves in different ways... some of us bitch about our day... some of us bitch about our lives... some of us have nothing to say in particualar... some of us have devotional stories, important messages, jokes, heartbreaks, life in general... some of us are lonely people who seek friendships online, some of us use mindsay as an outlet to the world... whatever the reasons, it doesn't matter if we are great bloggers, or not... we are here for the same reason... we all want our "voice heard"... I just hope that people don't judge me by what I write... my life is a series of events that happened... yeah, my life wasn't that great... but I don't let my experiences define who I am...
I am better than that...
nic
Just Wondering Where the Outrage Was
Civilian deaths in war are always terrible. I'm sure there are none among us who dispute that. So the killing of the people, apparently mostly women and children, in Qana is upsetting.
The Arab world is furious. Much of the world has condemned the attack.
I just can't help wondering where "much of the world" was when suicide bombers killed innocent civilians at a shopping mall when we were living in Netanya, Israel. And those attacks were just in our city. There were other attacks in other cities.
Where was the outrage then?
Where was the outrage when Qassam rockets flew just about every other day from Gaza into Israel--all aimed at innocent civilians, after Israel had withdrawn from there?
Just wondering...
The Arab world is furious. Much of the world has condemned the attack.
I just can't help wondering where "much of the world" was when suicide bombers killed innocent civilians at a shopping mall when we were living in Netanya, Israel. And those attacks were just in our city. There were other attacks in other cities.
Where was the outrage then?
Where was the outrage when Qassam rockets flew just about every other day from Gaza into Israel--all aimed at innocent civilians, after Israel had withdrawn from there?
Just wondering...
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