today was the first day i signed on myspace in a couple of days because i wanted to save any anxiety or problems that might arise from talking to cyn until after i was done with the class project that was due yesterday. i figured that any resulting anxiety would be enough to help keep me awake on the way to the conference today.
You asked me to not go to the BSS building when you are there. Is that correct? If so, I will not agree to that. I think that asking me to not go see my teachers (who are ALL in the BSS building) during thier office hours just because you are tabling is a bit ridiculous. But I can understand you not wanting me to hang out in front of the BSS building while you are tabling. That I can do. If it is correct to say that you don't want me "hanging around" the BSS building when you are there, then I will agree to that. I will go the BSS building when I need to regardless if you are there. I will not hang around the BSS building when you are.
And yes, of course I'm going to tell you to see your psychologist. You need to. You were suicidal, that was my main reason for referring you to a professional before. Now, you are having major PTSD issues (apparently, I don't really know first hand), which says to me, "I need help." If you had a friend with huge life and PTSD problems, I'm sure you'd tell that person to see his psychologist too.
she had also sent me another message that was simply titled, "good bye," which kinda freaked me out at first.
I've been doing a lot of thinking. I've decided that what is best for both of us is the end of any relationship between you and I. You can't stand seeing me or hearing about me, going places we've been together, etc. I'm tired of you projecting your problems upon me. I am not the reason you feel bad, and I am not going to let you make me feel as though I am. You are an unnecessary addition of anxiety in my life and so, this is good bye. I hope you find the help you need to get through your problems. Good luck with the rest of your life.
i have a few things to say to both of these, (especially all this crap about having some sort of relationship with me when she's the one that looked me in the eyes outside gist hall about a month ago and said the words, "we're no longer friends"), but since she deleted me as a friend, i can't send her messages. the only reason i hadn't deleted her yet was so i could check up on her n see what she was up to, laugh at her misery, etc., even tho i know that's not healthy for me. i did the same thing with raver jimmy at first, too. besides that, apparently my ride is here, (5 minutes early! never happens!), so i need to scramble to finish getting ready. i'll be back sunday night.
oh, n of course albert hasn't been on since monday. i'm really starting to wonder if the only reason i haven't moved on isn't just because of what we had, but cuz i kno i won't find better. seriously, is this all u got, guys?
