Stressed @ MindSay

I'm hitting at least 3/4 of the notes on a very long guitar hero song. It's called my life. XD

I have a ton of things going on, but I seem to have most of them under control, and I am not too behind on my homework. I've pretty much been keeping up, calling the people I need to call, completing the volunteering I need to complete, etc. It's very stressful, with a ton of things on my mind, but I don't think I'm failing the song yet!

It is kind of a band effort though, I have a friend who's been hanging out with me a lot, in fact playing guitar hero somewhat, and he's been awesome.

There's my update, I need sleep. (in fact I didn't even realise I wrote this, looking back a second time. I don't need sleep, I want it. and I meant to say I need to get back to my homework. x.x)

I am very behind in writing in my journal though, which is bad. And teachers hate me and make everything all the more frustrating. It seems that perhaps it is in their job description, or requirements, I don't know.

I also need to start eating healthier again, and exercising more. As there has been hardly any food in the house, I guess it's not exactly my fault, and this past few weeks have been especially fast paced and very packed, but I hope to get back to normal soon!

My friend is sick and I plan on going to give them soup and hugs!

Still no sleep, my throat has been sore, I've been coughing and sneezing somewhat and have a runny nose, and a bit depressed, but not too bad I guess.

I have a job and I'm not completely failing at life right now, so I should be thankful, and I am.

Song length: Unknown,  Percentage notes hit so far: aprx. 70%+

Streak: 10, SP phrases: 1/unknown

Goodnight!

here's a message that i just sent to albert on myspace that i'm sure he'll just delete w/o reading cuz he's a bastard:

please talk to me. even one of my professors could tell there was something wrong w/ me n i started crying. please albert

will someone please tell me why i'm still chasing someone who treats me the same way daniel did? honestly now...

i usually feel good after venting like that, but i don't. i just feel like no one cares...ok, there's a handful of ppl i think care, but its hard when the only ppl that give a shit about u live in a completely different state n u never have the time to talk to them...except for emo jimmy, he still lives in CA, but on the completely opposite side of the state...

i'm in my stats lab right now n i don't even care. i don't care. n then when i'm trying to do this homework next week i'm gonna be all stressed out, n i'm already stressed out because of what part of it has to do with, but i dunno...its one of those things that if i could just do it myself n not have to get permission to do something alternate it would mean a lot to me, it would show that i've made progress...that n i don't want to tell this professor i have ptsd...fuck

with like everything in my life right now. and i'm really short tempered and i feel the inclinition to ignore certain things because i'm worried that i might snap and make a mistake or say something that i don't mean because i'm very stressed out right now. there are so many things going on in my head, i don't even know where to begin in terms of writing about them. i'm stressed out because of school, i'm stressed out trying to find new room mates, i'm stressed out over this stupid situation with albert, the fact that i don't really have any one to hang out with other than reanna n she makes me feel like shit, i'm stressed that i haven't lost the weight i was supposed to lose by May, and i'm stressed cuz stuart needs to take a fucking chill pill. no, i haven't read ur replies yet cuz i'm pissed off about enough things in life right now that i don't need to lose my temper over something that's not a big fucking deal. I've told u, when u call, its bad fucking timing. i'm SORRY that i take my studies seriously, i'm SORRY that i want to graduate in four years so i decided to take four classes this semester, i'm SORRY that i want to get into grad school so i'm doing work in a professor's lab. i'm SORRY that i don't have time for you! but guess what? anna n jeanie can tell u that i don't have time for them, either. the last time i talked to anna on the phone was last week cuz i had 20 mins to kill before my next class, n the last time i talked her and jeanie before that was a couple weeks ago. i don't even have time to call emo jimmy n the one time that i did he didn't answer. if u can't fucking wait until school is over to talk to me n u can't be fucking understanding of the fact that i have a lot of shit going on, then fuck off. i'm fucking sorry. i've got three more damn weeks n if it weren't for the fact that i'm already stressed out n pissed off about 12 other things, this wouldn't even be that big of a deal. the only reason i'm still updating on here is because i need some place where i can vent my fucking feelings BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE TIME TO TALK TO THE PEOPLE I NORMALLY WOULD GET THIS SHIT OUT TO!!

 

oh, let's not forget my fucking financial issues...mike STILL won't pay me the bill money he owes me, we finally got how much gas $ we owe for ppl for WPA, but the rooms still aren't figured out n the reimbersments aren't figured out yet, either. I HAVE A FUCKING BUDGET! i'm sorry my parents don't just fucking hand me money n i have to work for shit n bust my ass to save up money so i don't starve or end up on the street cuz i can't afford my rent!

 

i hate everything right now.

I sometimes wonder why I put up with people sometimes.

Right now i'm hearing so much things from other people and i'm kinda getting sick of it. So much so that i'm going to take a few breaks from gdpt for a while. I just can't stand some of the egos running through there.

One minute one person says something the next someone doesn't agree and argues and then complains. On top of that chu nien is around the corner and even more ego's and ranks are just pissing me off.

 

 

Oh and uni, on holidays but still have assignments due fuck that.