Rules Of Life @ MindSay 
So honestly, I don't know anymore.
My life is beyond crazy at the moment.
Between, struggling to keep my grades above a C
and trying to keep myself from falling apart again,
I have no time left for maintaining my sanity.
Teachers --
Seems like the more everyone in class is ready to wrap things up and get ready for summer,
the more the teachers want to force us to study and do 6 hours of homework.
two words: not kewl. =/
At Home --
Parents.
Enough said, right?
Yeah.
I try to do everything right,
say all the right things to them
hoping it'll get them to leave me alone,
even doing chores and any other random shit they want done,
but still, I'm not good enough.
I'm not the daughter they'd been hoping for.
I know that for the 15 years I've been alive,
they've secretly been hoping that I would eventually become this wonderfully amazing child
The one they'd always dreamed of.
Guess I'm just a huge disappointment.
I'll never be good enough for them.
I'm just hoping that one day I can just get over that
and try not to think about how I've disappointed everyone.
Friends --
Hmmm.. what is there to say?
well, okay, so recently, I've found out things about a few of my friends that i almost wish i didnt know.
Smoking.
Drinking.
Self-Piercing.
And god only knows what else.
I mean, yeah, it may not seem that bad,
but i just think of how long this could have been going on and kept as a secret from me.
can i trust these people?
I dont know. I guess.
And at the same time, I'm actually closer to my friends than I ever have been before.
It's Me Against The World [and the world is winning] --
That basically sums up the last week.
First the shit between me and Becca.
Yeah, I was having a HORRIBLE day.
i took it out on her by saying "fucking fantastic" when she was going on and on about how happy she was.
yeah, i probably shouldnt have,
but havent we ALL done that before??
yeah. we have.
but instead of her just saying "well, somebody is bitchy today. . ."
and being done with it,
she goes on to say that Chris deserves better than me [true, but not her place to say that]
then she says some more shit like that.
the next day ends up being pretty much the same.
then yesterday (Day 3) I end up saying she's fake [it's true]
she gets her [asshole] of a boyfriend involved.
(yeah, dnt lie to me bitch, i know you went whineing to him and made him "fix it")
so i get a message from him saying "becca's fake"
(pssst.. yeah she is) but instead i say " let het bitch fight her own battles, this has nothing to do with you"
it should have ended there.
it didnt
he goes on to say "why cnat you ether dump Chris and get outta our lives or kill your self and get outta our lives either way everyone will be happy"
(basically the convo goes like this, blue is him, the other is me)
why cnat you ether dump Chris and get outta our lives or kill your self and get outta our lives either way everyone will be happy
umm.. no, sry, it dnt exactly work like that. :/
darn
why do you grasp to fals hope of ing happy with him?
being*
your just fooling yourself and slowly killing him
. . . well, 1- your wrong, & 2- is this supposed to make me feel terrible or sumthin? not working. maybe if it was coming from anyone else, but coming from u, it means nothing. :/
it doesnt?
how many times have you seen him in person
why do you care? mind your own fucking business
no Chris is like my best friend
and he has turned against me cuz your making his life misreble
i know, how can i be his best friend and trign to break hime and his gf up?
he cant see what best for him
hes only gonna get worse
it wont be the same person ever again if this keeps up
well, sry, but it's not up to you.
i know
its up to you and your killing
him
w/e
not my life or bf
hes gnna be diffrent forever
and cant you understand that you can never be with him?
your so far away and only met him once...
it dosent work
i've tried it before
and i almost ended up killing myself
is that what you want for him or you?
you cant say fer sure that is what would happen. you dont know. mmk. not everyone is like you. :/
its doomed to fail
and Chis is soo much like i se to be its not funny
And thats where it ended.
Yeah, what i was saying was pathetic, I know.
But if you've ever been put in a situation where you have someone like this asshole sayin shit,
a crazy fake delusional bitch saying shit,
both of your parents goin at you,
and you're trying to keep yourself from crying,
you'd understand that it's damn near impossible to come up with any convincing things to say.
and thats what sucks.
but it's kewl.
I dont need people like that in my life.
So yeah, I guess thats all I gotz to say =/
i 
Chris
| I'll try it..I could use the use the luck!! Good Luck!! |
| This is without a doubt one of the nicest good luck forwards I have Received. Hope it works for you -- and me! You have 6 minutes There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not Superstitious. This has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so Far. Do not keep this message. It must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very Unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, Agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired. ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their Conversational skills will be as important as any other. THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you Want. FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it. FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye. SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married. SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight. EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't Have much. NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only Way to live life completely. TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives. TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly. THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, Smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?" FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great Risk.. FIFTEEN Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze. SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; And responsibility for all your actions. EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship. NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps To correct it. TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your Voice. TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone. Now, here's the FUN part! Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve. 1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly. 5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking. 9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks 15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever Dreamed of will begin to take shape. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your Heart. Do not keep this message! |