Ruin @ MindSay

Except this year, it kind of was. I had the greatest times and the worst times...and I've made it through. Now I'm more happy than I've ever been, and I couldn't love it more. I've grown up, and decided to not deal with people's shit anymore, and in the end--that's gotten me past a few hard times, and spun me into newer exciting things. My life is starting to look to the sunny side.

:D

This past weekend was more than amazing. I only spent like 2ish hours at my house...and the rest was at Amanda's house (not that she lives far away--only like 4-5 blocks lol). We had tons of fun..and I would do a repeat any day.

Last night on the way home from work, we got talking about some things that have been bothering each of us. For only being friends for less than a year, I trust her with a lot of things, and we have great conversations that lets each of us get everything out and know each other a little better. I feel like I've known her for years.

I was over at Amanda's house quite a bit this past weekend, and I had asked her if Rob (her fiance), minded that I was over at their house pretty much the entire weekend and I'd probably be over quite a bit in the summer if it was okay. She told me that Rob actually liked that I came over and whatnot, because I'm a good friend, and very respectable (and respectful). He told Amanda he likes the girls she's is becoming friends with because they're nice and a huge change for the better from what some of her friends used to be like. We then went on to talk about how I'm a lot more mature for my age because of how I was brought up, and the things I had to deal with at young ages. We talked about our lives and how even though they were sooo different, we're still a lot the same now that we've both grown into something awesome. She said she's proud of me for how I've figured things out for myself and future, and the way I'm so good with her kid and try so hard not to judge people and get along with everyone so well, and plenty of other things. It made me sort of happy to hear that...I don't know why even. It's hard to believe I've only been friends with Amanda since last August...because I feel like I've known her forever. And now I'm going to be Amanda's personal attendant for her wedding in August. There was so much we talked about that night...and I'm glad we did. I'm thankful that I have someone like her in my life, and a friend like her that will probably stick around forever.

This weekend, I've noticed that I'm beginning to become friends with a lot more people who are older than I am, and not just by a year. But I've also come to realize that a lot of people my age don't have things figured out, and they don't know how to deal with certain situations. Sometimes I can't seem to connect as often with people my age as I can with people a few (2-10) years older than me...because they either need to grow up, or haven't been through some of the deaths or hard situations I've had to overcome. I don't know...it sounds kind of stupid, but I don't know how else to explain it.

I have 16 days left of highschool, and then life as I knew it is gone. And as much as I've got those stupid little butterflies twirling around in my stomach--I'm excited for a whole new world to begin. More than ever, I'm excited for a new start...a new spin on things.

<33

I have finally made a decision. Friends are pointless. They're good to have to hang out with, and not look like such an outcast. But really.,they can screw up your life. It really only happens when you have a best friend who has a boyfriend. One of mine, is my best friend Ange. She is constantly hanging out with her boyfriend, in-school,out of school, when ever she gets the chance to be near him. Always texting him when he is not in a class with us, and always gets ticked at him. I'm honestly getting sick of her. She's become a major bitch. She gets along with her boyfriend, but like any other teenage couple, or just one in general, they have their days of arguing. It seems like every day for Ange. She always seems to be mad at him for some reason. I ask her what's wrong, and all she says is "Nothing!" I ask her if it's her boy friend, and she's like "Yes! He's being stupid!" Sometimes she doesn't even answer me. When ever she's pissed I try to make her happy, change the subject, make her laugh, what ever. What do I get in return? A friend who is pissed,ignores me, or just acts like a total bitch. Sometimes when I ask her what's wrong, she doesn't tell me, BUT she tells another person. That happens most of the time. One of our friends comes up and asks her what's wrong, and she starts pouring out all the details, making me feel like total shit because she can't seem to tell me, other than "Oh he's being dumb!" Well what the fuck can I do if all I know is that he's being stupid, when really, he might be hurting her,cheating on her, doing stuff that he shouldn't do, etc. He doesn't do any of those that I know of. But how do I know? All I know is he's being dumb, so I don't know how the hell I can help when half of he  time she doesn't tell me, and it's usaully a tad more than stupidity. I just hate how boyfriends screw up friendships. She wonders why I never want to go some where with her. I don't feel like hanging out with her, her boyfriend, and like... 4 other people I don't know, or hate. But when I do hang out with her, which is pretty much never, except school, she barely talks to me. It's usually her talking to other people we are with. I don't really enjoy following her around, and feeling like she forget that I am with her. Hello? I'm fat!It's kind of hard to not see me! So I don't know if I should count her as an actual friend since I don't talk to her because she is too busy with her bf, or other people. Ahhh the joy of teenage relationships and lost friendships. I'l always have room in my heart to let her back in as a true friend, but currently, it's closed due to repairs. If only true friends didn't live in another town as you...  Hmm... Jaime you should move here, I will help take care of your baby when it's born. I love kids! I'll change those nasty diapers, feed it, do what ever. But please, tell your dick head of a boy friend to be nice to me, or else he will notice his balls are now coming out of his mouth. xD. Oh yes! I will kick him there REALLY hard if he tries to be a douche to me. But ypu wont let him! You love me. She always sticks up for me if people push me around or insult me. Jaime you rock <3! See mindsay users! I true friend sticks up for others, doesn't ignore them, accepts it when someone tries to help them, tells them their problems, what ever! Mahaha.