Revision @ MindSay

Dixie currently feels:

 Alone

 

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I haven't blogged much this week.

 

I've been so exhausted with all of the exams and revision sessions I've been doing.

I've been coming in and falling asleep most of the time.

 

With everybody now leaving me, all I do now is download music and sort it out - then put it on iTunes.

 

So far, I only have 850 songs and 57 videos.

But tomorrow I'm going to add loads more.

 

 

The Media Studies exam on Tuesday was piss.

The two 20 mark designing questions were exactly the same as the ones we had in the mock - design a music TV programme, and design a comic front cover.

 

I did the same two designs.

Typically, it was the best drawing of #1263 I've ever done, and I won't get to keep it.

 

Those Welsh bastards at the WJEC better appriciate it.

 

 

Today I had a Geography exam.

It wasn't so easy, but it wasn't overly difficult.

 

I have Friday and Monday off - FOUR DAY WEEKEND - and I'm gonna chill like fuck.

I might even end up eating all the ice cubes in the freezer.

 

It's been so hot recently, but today, I'm wearing a hoody in the house. Mam's wearing a jacket, dad's wearing a jumper - it's so cold.

 

 

Mam upset me earlier, so I used BSR again.

I only did 5 cuts, just above my elbow, but they were quite deep.

 

 

I downloaded 'That's Not My Name' by The Ting Tings earlier.

It's a really bright and happy indie-pop song, and it cheered me up a bit.

 

 

I've tried completing The Impossible Quiz four times in the past 10 minutes.

Every single time, I died on question 107.

 

107! THERE'S ONLY 110!!!

 

I watched a video of someone complete it, and I KNOW I can do questions 108, 109 and 110.

 

It's just 107!

 

...Alright, "wearing a tie" is a suggested tag today.

 

I haven't worn a tie in ages.

 

 

All through the Geography revision sessions, I've sat at the back with Miraan and done nothing but draw freehand sketches of #1263.

 

They've all turned out quite good.

I've drawn her in her school uniform from the end of the novel, wearing #1264's huge polo shirt from Rivalry, in her favourite outfit of a white and red shirt and green shorts, and then I drew her bedraggled and distraught after Imprisonment.

 

I've began to write Decampment - the chapter that comes after Imprisonment.

I need to finish Perseverance, then I'll be able to post it up.

 

I've gone over chapter 1 of Fire of Glory, and that's ready to be re-posted.

Either today or tomorrow, or even Saturday, maybe Sunday, maybe Monday - I'll go over chapter 2 and I'll post that up as well.

Dixie currently feels:

 Alone

 

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 Currently playing:

 

- Mario Party 4

- Pokémon Diamond

 

 Currently listening to:

 

- Guardian Stones - Fairyland

- What's My Age Again? - Blink 182

- Leech - Soul Embraced

 

 

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 Times cried: Twice

 Wounds inflicted: None

 

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...Sigh, where to begin.

 

So, this morning, all of year 11 were called into the sports hall.

(We couldn't go into the auditorium, because all the desks are set up for exams in there...)

 

So we went in, and we were given timetables.

We're actually allowed study leave now - but we HAVE to come in for revision sessions.

And looking at this, because I still have four exams left, I'm only going to have like three days of study leave.

 

One day is tomorrow, which I'm happy about.

After today, I don't want to do anything else for a long as possible period of time.

 

 

Periods 1 and 2, we had English revision for the exam on the afternoon.

I understand all the poems, so I filled out my sheets really fast, and played some hangman with Nazia.

 

All of my words were one after another, and they all seemed to spell a sentence:

 

"Hiya Nazia"

"Eat your yam"

"Change My Pants"

"Catawampus"

 

Yeah, I found it amusing. :)

 

Then I started picking dodgy words like ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARISM and PULCHRITUDE.

Then I wasn't sure if I'd actually spelt pulchritude right, so I asked madam - we were on a break, so it wasn't like we were meant to be doing anything.

 

She said I had spelt it right, because the page said: "P u l c _ r i _ u d e", so she knew what it was.

Then she asked me what it meant, and I didn't know. I knew the origin of it - Latin - but I didn't know the meaning.

 

So she brought out the consise dictionary and looked it up.

 

Pulchritude means outstanding beauty, apparently.

 

For the rest of the revision session, I got a piece of paper and wrote down all of my favourite words - most of them, very lengthly - then I looked through the dictionary, finding new ones.

 

I'll list them. I have my sheet next to me. :)

 

Soliterraneous

Catawampus

Prestidigitation

Colloquialism

Horticulture

Indehiscent

Omnipotent

Intoxicated

Polje

Duplicitous

Bombastic

Zamboni

Sodmise

Somnambulance

Ambidextrous

Mausoleum

Kleptomania

Fastidious

Benevolence

Cartography

Flibbertigibbet - IT'S ACTUALLY A REAL WORD, LMAO!

Parenthesis

Troglodyte

Lederhosen

Pulchritude

Soliloquy

Tyranopanophobia

Machiavellian

Mastication

Equilibrium

Comatose

Atavistic

Bibliophile

Abhorrent

Dodecahedron

Lexicography

Benciful

Septennium

Phenolphthalein

Masquerade

Ragnarok

Epitaxsis

Anesthesia

Enigma

Larcenous

Hypothetical

Effluence

 

 

Tomorrow, I'll give you all the definitions. :)

You can expand your vocabulary, thanks to me. :D

 

(Besides, I have nothing better to do tomorrow. :P)

 

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I've been playing my keyboard tonight.

I played Braveheart through about 10 times.

 

Then I printed the sheet music for We Three Kings, and I'm learning that.

 

Playing the keyboard calms me down - but there's barely anything I can actually play.

And none of it is really complex...

 

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But yes...

 

English exam.

 

Section B, writing - I stupidly chose question 5: "Describe a dream world".

 

I can't write anymore. I had to force myself to write.

It was the worst thing I've ever written in my entire life, and now I don't ever want to write anything again.

 

...Sigh.

 

But typically...

Despite not being ABLE to write anything...

...I STILL FUCKING WANT TO!

Dixie currently feels:

 Depressed

 

(Well what else is new...?)

 

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Yesterday was a bank holiday Monday, so I spent the day at Adam's house.

 

We played a few songs on Guitar Hero III co-op, and got him a couple of groupie points.

Then he burnt me Parappa The Rapper, and I tried it out, did the first few levels, and got the "U Rappin' Cool!" rank on level 1.

 

When I got home though, I kept failing level 1.

Which was annoying...

Almost as annoying as the fact that memory card slot 1 is broken on my chipped Playstation, so I'll never be able to save PTR, because it will only save to slot 1.

 

Anyway though.

We sat around drinking Cherry Coke, eating Oreos and sweets - milk bottles and cherry cola bottles - then crisps and salted peanuts.

 

Adam then suggested he get out the old PS1 and we play Resident Evil 3.

Of course, he played it, I watched and offered my hints. :)

 

It was great fun actually.

 

The weird thing was though, every time I seemed to speak - something would happen.

And this happened like five times - every time I started talking, either zombies would jump out of cars, dogs would jump out of windows, or Nemesis would burst out of a door.

 

 

 

Today's been shit though.

 

It's weird though - I don't think I've done ANY schoolwork today.

 

- OMFG THERE'S A SPIDER ON THE WALL BEHIND MY MONITOR...

 

 

...But yes.

Umm...

 

Lesson 1 - IT, exam prep, I'm not doing the exam again, I had nothing to do, I went on FPC.com.

Lesson 2 - English, revision, I didn't do a lot, just listened and read.

Lesson 3 - Science, Cowley just talked us through our coursework.

Lesson 4 - Maths, Wilson wasn't even there, we were down in humanities 2, and Miraan, Amanda and I just played hangman for like the whole hour.

Lesson 5 - Media studies, down the CLC, Sam and I just sat there playing hangman on the PC, because we can't really do an awful lot on our project.

 

 

Though, I felt depressed all day.

Just listening to a certain set of people who used to be friends with me until they met each other - talking and laughing down the aisle next to me.

So I cut myself a little bit.

 

At dinnertime, I did my left, and I did my right after school.

 

Which was a bad time to do it, because as Mrs Mac was talking to me, she took me by the right wrist - as she often does when she talks to people - but she pressed her fingers right into the fresh cuts, and it KANED.

So I just stood there wincing, trying to keep silence, despite how much it hurt.

 

Tomorrow I have to go and see those people, and I'm not looking forward.

At least mother isn't coming.

 

Sigh...

 

 

Freddy Kruger and Jason Voorhees join forces, then go head to head.

 

THE TOP TEN MOST WANTED VILLAINS IN HORROR FILMS

 

Bruce (the Great White Shark) – Amityville Island (Martha’s Vineyard), MA –

From the film Jaws (1975)  

In the summer of ’75, Bruce claimed six lives.  Four shark relatives returned years later, in three sequels—One specimen ‘resurfaced’ on the coasts of Amity Island in 1978, a mother and her baby swam south to terrorize the visitors at a Floridian aquatic theme park (in 1983), and the last swam towards Bermuda where he was successfully exterminated by brave widow Mrs. Ellen Brody (1987).    In the 1975 movie this man-eating fish did not have a name, but was nicknamed “Bruce” during filming (so named after Spielberg’s lawyer at the time, Bruce Ramer).

Species: Carcharodon carcharias - Estimated Length: 25-feet - Weight: 3-tons

 

Charles Lee Ray / AKA: Chucky the ‘Good Guy’ doll – Chicago, IL –

Child’s Play (1988) - Six-year-old Andy Barclay receives a stolen toy purchased by his mother from a shady back-alley vendor.  The animated doll, as it turns out, is inhabited by the soul of a dangerous criminal on the lamb who is well versed in the Black Arts.  In the end, Chucky never really dies.  He returns four times; is married (in Bride of Chucky), and sires a child (in Seed of Chucky).

 

Daniel Robitaille / AKA: The Candyman – New Orleans, LA – Candyman (1992)

Daniel – tortured to death by thousands of killer bees - is most likely a distant cousin of Bloody Mary (an urban legend) and Guy Fawkes (the real-life British arsonist who was lynched to death via bonfire).   This supernatural apian-menace returned in two sequels.

 

The Fisherman - a North Carolina coastal town - I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997)    An innocent pedestrian is mowed down by a group of young adults out for an evening drive/ride.  Said victim returns from his watery grave to wreak vengeance on the people that tried to cover up his death.  The homicidal man now wears a Gloucester-style slicker, and comes armed with various 'fish cleaning devices.'  Sequel - I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)

 

Freddy Krueger - The (idyllic) Town of Springwood, CA (?) – A Nightmare on Elm Street (1985)  - Alive, Freddy kidnapped and murdered several children.  He was lynched; burnt to death by bereft Springwood parents, and years later Freddy returned in the dreams of neighborhood teenagers.  Original film and sequels available in special DVD collection.

 

Jason Voorhees – Camp Crystal Lake, NJ – Friday the 13^th (1980)

Local legend has it that, years ago, physically deformed Jason accidentally drowned because of two neglectful camp counselors.   Actually, Jason never died and, possessing supernatural strength as an adult, he goes on a killing spree to avenge the decapitation of his mother.   In one original sequel - Freddy vs. Jason, the deformed man returns from the grave to do Freddy Krueger’s bidding, then rebels against him in a battle to the death.    Numerous sequels available on DVD.

 

Michael Myers – Haddonfield, IL – Halloween (1978) - As a child, Michael murdered his older sister, and thereafter committed to a mental institution.  Escaping fifteen-years later (now a young adult) he returns to his hometown to wreak more bloody havoc.   It turns out that the local virginal babysitter, Laurie, is Michael's younger sister, and next in the bloodline to be killed.   Fortunately for Laurie, concerned psychiatrist  Mr. Loomis  shoots Michael before he can kill sis, but Michael disappears mysteriously from the killing scene.  Michael returns in numerous sequels.   The late co-producer Debra Hill was from Haddonfield, NJ., the inspiration for the 'Halloween' Illinois town.

 

Pinhead – 55 Ludovico Place, (Liverpool, England?) – Hellraiser (1987)  - He is the leather-clad human-pin-cushion from Hell, and the leader of the sado-masochistic Cenobite hell-spawn.  Pinhead returned in at least 7 sequels.  The franchise is inspired by the short story “The Hellbound Heart,” written by the awesome horror novelist Clive Barker—also creator of aforementioned Candyman (short story).   Barker is from Liverpool, UK.

 

The Tall Man - The Cemetery, CA - Phantasm (1979) - A gaunt, evil-looking cemetery worker stalks-to-kill two brothers with the help of lethal orbs - equipped with spikes and drills - which he flings at human quary, and Jawa-like trolls that use trash cans for coffins.  There are three sequels. 

 

The Amityville House – 112 Ocean Avenue, Amityville, Long Island, NY –

The Amityville Horror (1978)    A lot can happen in one year: first Ronald De Feo slaughters his entire family, saying he heard voices telling him to do so.  Twelve months later, the Long Island home is resold to another unsuspecting family and the vicious cycle appears to begin again.  This haunted waterfront property went through a series of owners in at least three sequels (plus a 2005 remake). 

I will be thirty-five soon, in a few days. Not that days matter in matters of aging - it is all something fluid and irrelevant and moment specific and shit like that...

 

But I have spent the last couple of days trying to figure out.. trying... to figure out.. what i want to do with my life.. Who am I? What the fuck am I doing? What do I do now?

 

I haven't gone out since Thursday. I had been riding on the momentum of going out and staying exposed to people in order to not lose my ability to be "out"... I hate being around people.. They scare me, I feel awkward.. I don't know how to act... I have lost my momentum... but I had to stay away, I couldn't bear seeing the Ex anymore and pretending and smiling and waving and being heartbroke and feeling dirty and awful and stupid and and and...

 

So I am sitting here, house to my self... trying to figure out... who I am... What I am... How to remember how to be, something that was so simple when I was a child...

 

I don't know, don't know, don't know how to Be.. I am confused. I have been confused for a long time. Thinking about how confused I am doesn't make me less confused. Not thinking about how confused I am, trying to just "be me", well that doesn't help either, because in the middle of it I always look down like Wile E. Coyote and notice I am walking on air... Then I fall.

 

Did I mention that I am confused?