Raving @ MindSay

• Ever notice that older people who need glasses never seem to wear them when they need them? You always hear them say, "Oh wait a minute, I can't read this because I don't have my glasses." or "Can you tell me what that is?  I don't have my glasses with me"  What gives??? I don't know why this bugs me but it does.

• Why don't people who need meds and are prescribed meds TAKE THEIR MEDS? I can understand financial reasons, but for crying outloud take your blood pressure medication!!! And for FUCK'S sake, take your Zoloft, Lexipro, Norpramin, Ritalin, Concerta,Paxil, etc. I mean none of the disorders or diseases treated by these drugs are anyone's fault, but it sure as hell is someone's fault if they don't take their meds. People shouldn't have to put up with your unmedicated asses!  I mean if I had chronic gas that had to be controlled by medication it would just be plain rude for me to not take my meds then get on an elevator or sit around people and subject them to my gassy ass!

• One thing I learned about raggedy assed people who don't apologize to those they've wronged is that apologizing means they have to own up to something they haven't forgiven THEMSELVES for.

• Premonition starring Sandra Bullock and Julian McMahon was GAWD AWFUL!  The acting was okay, but the characters were under developed and the screenplay was weak. Two people were asleep in the theater and I kept nodding off. I hardly ever nod off in a movie -- even a bad one. What made matters worse was the theater was cold. Why in the hell do they keep it so cold in movie theaters? 

• My spring break is already over. It seemed so short.  I didn't get to read as much as I wanted to.  I could cry right about now! :(

• I'm rarely surprised, but I am constantly shaking my head at the lengths some people will go to in order to get attention. That aspect of human nature will never cease to amaze me.

Well that ends my rants for the day hopefully I've gotten this all out of my system. 

so last night was actually pretty cool :D he picked me up first, which i thought made more sense but when he'd called earlier to see if i was ready i told him that whenever was fine cuz i was n he said he needed to pick up the other ppl. (Ben n his gf) i was wating for about 6 minutes (5 mins 38 seconds is how far i'd gotten into the song on my iPod, a remix of "Mr. Brightside," but i was outside a little bit earlier than he said he'd be there n i like that song so the time actually kinda flew :P) n then we got going. i sat in the back w/ Squeakers cuz i just love animals n we were gonna be @ ben's house shortly n i didn't see the point in only sitting in front for seriously just a minute or two. on the way there, tho, he suddenly said, "Oh, n for a rave, i'm not going this weekend but i might go next weekend n if i do i'll call u." wait a minute. what? i gave a huge, ecstatic and excited gasp, "Will you really?!" he started laughing shly. "yeah" "Really?!" another little laugh. "No, I'm being totally serious!" i debated whether or not to tell him not to get my hopes up if he didn't really mean it, but instead I just repeated, "Will you really?!" another little laugh. "Yeah, sure, if u wanna come." "YAY!" I do this thing when i get really happy/excited where i exclaim that n then clap my hands. That's exactly what i did. I think he was more laughing at my reaction. Very few ppl @ HSU have ever seen/heard me like that n ever time we've had a conversation about him taking me to a rave its always been online (except for the first time he said that maybe he'd take me to one, to which i had an excited reaction but i took it w/ even less of a grain of salt than i am now) so he's never seen my reaction when he's told me "maybe" or something. he told me that he wasn't sure cuz he had relatives flying in for Thanksgiving n he told Ben once he was in the car that he wasn't sure he was going to be able to go for the whole thing. i'm still not trying to get my hopes too high, but this is the closest i've ever gotten w/ him acctually saying that if he want to a rave he'd call me to see if i could come! (coincidentally i brought my E w/ me cuz i 1) don't trust Kim @ all n 2) just incase this happened XD we'll see)

his gf (let's call her "C" just for the sake of confidenciality) was really nice n it was interesting to see them interact. (no candy was offered like in my dream, but she did bring some popcorn for me n Ben which J ate most of XD n e excuse to have his hand touch mine, lol...she also offered a banana, which i declined just cuz i dun like them n some of a giant scone she made later, which no matter what J says i thought was really good! lol) She knows Ben so it was kinda weird n i spent most of my time being quiet n shy n singing along to the music. (J also did much of this when he wasn't talking to his gf :P BAD TENOR MY ASS! but i'll also touch on that later, hehe) @ one point we made a pit stop just to get out n stretch n J had to pee. he didn't have a sweatshirt on, which is amazing cuz me, Ben, n C were fuckin freezin n we did a little group huddle n started rubbing up against each other. it was kinda funny getting to watch him pee, hehe...but when he turned around he was like, "no need to have an orgy w/o me" XD yeah, it was weird having his gf's ass rubbing up against my crotch XD but we got back in the car n kept going. Squeakers was pretty chill the whole time, which was amazing cuz when we'd gone to pick up C n me n Ben were waiting in the car he started crying. :( it was so sad. i didn't even know chinchillas made noise! :O neither did ben, but he's not much of an animal person. we told J when he got in the car n he said that he did that when he brought him up @ the beginnin of the semester XD but yeah, the trip was still pretty fun. i did get a little jealous when i'd see her reach over n hold his hand or something while he was driving (but apparently he kept hurting her fingers XD) or put a hand on his leg or play w/ his hair, but it wasn't that bad. the only thing that was really awkward was once we got to her place we all got out cuz we all helped her carry something (i had a pair of pink rain boots, lol), n once again he had to pee (which he did a total of three times on the trip, but then again he also drank a total of three cans of Dr. Pepper, the last of which he probably finished after he dropped me off) so me, C, n Ben all hid from him XD it was her idea, n rather than come look for us he just sat n waited! XD! he was sitting on a step, tho, n when she went to hug him he layed down so she was on top of her. i could tell Ben felt awkward, too, so it wasn't n e thing suspicious that i did. i guess they kissed when they said "bye" n "see u in a week" to each other but Ben n I were busy watching this huge moth fly around a light :P i do still wish he was mine, but they are cute together.

after that we dropped off Ben n after some speculation made it out of San Fransisco. (oh yeah, C's from Berkeley n Ben's from SF.) apparently J has a map of SF in his dash, but we didn't have to use it. i'd moved to the front seat n i thought it was gonna be a little weird bein in the front w/ him when it didn't mean we were getting laid, but it really wasn't. we started singing again n after No Doubt's "Don't Speak" he told me i have a nice voice. i guess its ok considering that i wasn't singing @ full capacity cuz i can be really loud (which he knows full well XD!) n singing loud in small cars can be very bad. but i gave a timid thanx i was like, "yeah, bad tenor my ass!" (as u may recall, like a week ago or something we were talking online n he said he was a bad tenor n i said somethin along the lines of, "psh, ur probably better than me now") we started talking about singing which was really cool cuz i love to sing n even tho i hated everything about high school, i did like being in the musicals because it helped me learn how to sing more properly n i love talking about that. he said that its not so much he's a bad tenor, he's just untrained (n even tho he's not a lead he does have a couple of solos as it turns out) n we started talking about how we noticed that after some training our ranges expanded n we could sing things that we didn't used to be able to n how exciting that is. it made me happy to talk to him about all that, n "Mr. Brightside" ended up playing on his iPod, n it turns out HE DOESN'T LIKE THAT SONG! C had started playin The Killers for me earlier n when that song came on he had her change it, n then it came up on shuffle again! so we started talking about how there's songs we'll start singing n then realize we don't like them, cuz i guess that's one for him XD its weird cuz that's the song i was listenin to the last time he saw me on the way home, that's the remix from the vid of Monster Massive i sent him, (if i'd known he didn't like that song i probably wouldn't have done that, lol), n one of the remixes is what i was listenin to when he picked me up last night! its weird, lol...but n e way, we ended up havin to pull over cuz there was somethin weird goin in, so i comforted Squeakers, who luckily didn't cry again during the whole trip, n after that we just listened to techno the rest of the way home. :D i didn't recognize the songs he played n most of them had too fast of a beat to dance to, but i was still rockin out :P he did sing when there were words to sing to, tho. such a nice voice...:)

he said he'd call me again if he went to a rave n that he was gonna be leavin next Sunday around 10:00am n i told him to just give me a call when he had details on that, too. (if we can figure out wtf is wrong w/ the router then maybe i'll sign online n talk to him or somethin) i'd figured that as long as he had a gf i had a snowball's chance in hell of him taking me to a rave, n that still may be true, but @ least its not as much now as it was before...hehe...but when i got home, i put my shit down, ate a leftover piece of quiesh in the fridge, found Leela n pet her a bit (she's huge! like a full grown n slightly fat cat!), n then got to sleep @ about 3:30am, half an hour after i'd gotten there. Today i watched TV, played w/ Leela more, talked to my mom n my bro some more n read some of the new Rolling Stone, which my mom somehow got a subscription for. as far as why i haven't been online all day, if u dun read my brother's blog this entry pretty much explains it. there's really nothin more to it than that. if u have an account on [adult swim].com (*coughpalyer101cough*) i'd greatly appreciate it if u helped me kill Peach in the Super Smash Brothers Melee Elimination thread n help me eliminate n e one who isn't The Bear from Harvey Birdman or H.E.L.P.e.R. from The Venture Brothers in the Grand Character Elimination: Comedy thread. competition in the former is heating up, (altho my comments r meant in good fun even tho i'm getting the vibe from him that his aren't :/) but yeah, i guess i'm gonna keep screwin around w/ that n we're supposed to go out to dinner tonight. i'm not that hungry cuz i did eat kinda a lot today, but that just means leftovers, lol. :P thanx for readin this, the few of u that did. its much appreciated! :)

OH SHIT! N HOW CAN I FORGET?! fuck it, this entry is too long already- those who read this, remind me to post later about the "Otep thing". even if that's all u say, it will still help me remember cuz its a BIG thing!

so i'm talking to raver Jimmy about raves kinda, and i know from reading his myspace that there's one coming up in a couple weeks that him and a couple other people from humboldt are going to and they're bringing some people, too. it came up again that i've wanted to go to a rave since i was 13, (5.5 years i'd say, now), and he said that maybe over winter break if i came home then he'd take me to one. honestly, if you're not going to take me or don't want to then stop saying that you might. its a real pain in the ass to keep getting led on like that.

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i was talking to him online a little more and we talked about that stuff a little bit. here's the conversation:

fuzzycookie1: i do have to admit that i feel intrusive kind of though, cuz i've never gone and it don't know shit about rave culture, but i'm willing to learn

......

Jimmy: and np on being intrusive or w/e, the truth is I haven't taken u to one cuz I have kinda had a change of mind introducing peeps to ravin' after the experience my good friend kyle had
Jimmy: which was a not so good one

......

fuzzycookie1: hey, its cool. shit happens
Jimmy: and also, I am off by meself ravin' ussually, wouldn't hang with u in all truthfulness and dunno if u'd be cool with that
fuzzycookie1: if i took someone to a heavier concert and they had a bad experience i'd probably be a little cautious, too
Jimmy: I either a) tend to be antisocial cuz I am tired and just wanna dance or b) ADD cuz I am rolling :D
fuzzycookie1: well i've never done E so i dunno about that, but i tend to just like to have a good time
Jimmy: he just got a little too into the feeling of rolling, and wasn't into for the music, he had a fuckin awesome time, and luckily realized he was getting too into it drug wise, but not somethin' I wanna introduce other peeps to, cuz in his case he realized
fuzzycookie1: for example, when i'd go to concerts, i would usually get so into it that people around me would tend to watch me instead of the band, haha....
Jimmy: but I dun wanna be the one who got one of my friends into it, and then make it end up ina  rehab story

i got kicked offline after that and now that i have my connection back he isn't on, but it makes me feel a lot better to hear all of that. i know that if i went to a strange place by myself for the first time and there was only one person I knew there, i would tend to stick to that one person. and it is a good thing that his friend realized that, because some people don't, some are in denial, and some do but don't give a fuck. *cough*Stuart*cough* I'm very tired so i'm deffinately getting to bed now, though. we'll see how tomorrow is.

EVERY FUCKING TIME A GIRL SPEAKS HER MIND, SHE GETS ASKED IF SHES ON HER FUCKING PERIOD.

DO WE FUCKING QUESTION IF YOUR MALE PARTS ARE WORKING CORRECTLY CAUSING YOU TO BE A BITCH? NO! SO FUCK OFF

hahahahaha i'm done.