Prejudice @ MindSay

Today many thoughts go tumble and rumble in my brain, the old and the new. So I’ve decided to gather them up (as quickly as I can remember them) and put them together in this piece.

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PREJUDICE

 

“You can’t judge a person by what the rest of his race has done. Every country or race has its darkness. But I want to go out to the world and not be judged for darkness which doesn’t concern me as a person. If some may have been called ‘thieves’--- I must say that doesn’t make me a thief too just because my color or religion is the same as theirs. Is their family the same as mine? Were they raised in the values my parents brought me up with? Do they read the same books I read? Do they think the way I do? Or feel my feelings? Do they like pizza with sardines and mushrooms and loaded with fresh tomatoes and green peppers on it with tons of mozzarella cheese? I don’t think they do or risk a stomach ache! So even if we were of the same color, they certainly positively definitely are -- not me or I them.” ----- I wrote this in freshman high school and this left my old withered ultra-conservative teacher dumbstruck with horror. She thought it too strong. Is it?

EXPECTATIONS

 

I start out with a set of expectations for every new experience coming my way. But almost always these expectations get dumped or brushed aside because something else is being formed or brought forth holding its own distinct wonder and flavor. So if I so stubbornly held on to my expectations, it would have come out in a far different way. It would then be something that was according to ‘my’ wants, ‘my’ set of parameters or conditions, and ‘my’ desired results. Where is the thrill in that? ‘Expectations’ rob the thrill off a new experience. Yes, they do. And if you’re going to say that one can’t detach himself from having expectations on anything new, I’ll say yes to that, but…..let those expectations be tempered with knowing that things will happen when they happen without any help from you. So don’t try to color it with setting down expectations, yours, for it to arrive at ‘your’ desired results. Let the new experience ride. Let it reveal to you its wonder, beauty, joy, magic, adventure, delight, wisdom, truth in its own distinct way. Let it perhaps squeeze out of you feelings which you may have forgotten or have chosen to ignore. Let it alter some old preconceived notions about things and people and make you see that perhaps you have been wrong about them after all? Expectations are good but don’t let it stand in the way of wonder and learning.

IN LIFE THERE ARE NO GUARANTEES

 

A big yes to that one. You can’t really be too sure that your job would last you forever (can you?), that nothing will go wrong, that it won’t rain on your parade, or that your fortunes will stay strong, or that your health will not fail one day, or that no one will oppose your plans, or that your daughters will marry good men (ugh! Wish I knew). There is no guarantee that it won’t. So if that is the case, why continue with this business of living? Well, for the simple reason that because of its uncertainties, we are thus pushed to enjoy what we have ---do what we can with what we have now. There is wisdom in that. That means then to do whatever it is you do now with everything you’ve got. Be the best. Give it your best shot. Value the people you are with and treasure every precious moment that goes by. Relish beauty where you find it. Learn well whatever there is to learn. Love well when love finds you. So if and when one day things do go wrong cause there’s no guarantee that it won’t, you can look back with a smile and say ‘I did my best’…. And best is always good.

LIFE IS A POT OF STEW

 

Do you know what goes in a pot of stew? I’m not a cook but I can see that bits and pieces of all sorts go into it. You’ve got meat, vegetables, spices, water, etc. And it all gets mixed up together and the fire cooks it up to just right. So is life. We too get all bits and pieces of all sorts of things and experiences which get intertwined in our lives each day. We get knocked up and down and around in that mix which then makes us lose our bearing or hold in life. Easily we can lose ourselves in it. But wait! It doesn’t happen for no good reason. Look hard, think hard. Every bit of what may seem ‘scrap’ to you – bits here and there – are actually lending interest to the whole of things. Get it? Those odds and ends are just the spice that livens up your life. Every different thing in that odd mix makes its own contribution to the whole effort --- life! And what creates it into a delicious whole? Attitude – it’s the fire that cooks it up to just right. It helps us appreciate hidden beauty and truths, makes us see where true value lies, and teaches us to delight in the way it all blends up to create a delicious sumptuous pot of stew. Yes, life is a pot of stew .. a scrumptious one.

Okay, my pen rests at this point. :-)  Bye for a bit! Blessings!

Over the past week, the popular chain Dunkin' Donuts and celebrity chef Rachael Ray have been under fire for a poorly thought out advertisement. Ray, who posed for the ad wearing a keffiyeh, a traditional headdress of Arab men, has been pulled from the ad due to the alleged portrayal of Muslim extremism and terrorism.

Those of Palestinian descent claim the outburst caused by this ad is a complete form of prejudice. Both a fashion trend and a symbol of nationalism, the people of Palestine look to the keffiyeh in the same respect one would look to their flag, however, when worn it is no different than sporting a baseball hat in Western culture.

Regarding the gaffe, Dunkin' Donuts has released the following statement: "Absolutely no symbolism was intended. However, given the possibility of misperception, we are no longer using the commercial.”

Across the Internet, reactions have been both in support and against this recently released and quickly removed ad. Was this is a blatant focus on Muslim extremism or a simple error in judgment? Are we being safe in removing the ad, or is there not enough evidence to make such claims?

This post was contributed by cas 

So ... I find myself this morning thinking about self-image. Where does it come from? Who defines us ... Who has helped to define me? A number of people have had a monumental influence on who I have become and who I continue to become.  :)

• Obviously my parents played a critical role both biologically and in the way they nurtured me.  Nature + Nurture! 

• One nerdy & humble man of God (first name, Jim) back in my sophomore year in high school, demonstrated that Jesus was bigger than church, bigger than Sunday morning, and alive & able to change lives still. He also let me feel around and find my own way to love Jesus.

• After college, I enlisted in the Army, and was shipped off to a few different places. I landed in Fairbanks, Alaska, certain I'd been set to the absolute end of the world. I was not too happy with God or my life at that point. Still ... God watched out for me, set me in a family there ... a family that loved Him. They became more than just friends ... they became mentors on many levels. (Another Jim & Barb - and 3 kids: Jerry, Lori, & Beth) They all taught me tons of stuff ... TONS! They showed me Family. Discipline. Communication. They became a life sized object lesson that heavily influenced my early notions of family.

• Then ... my Ex ... not a Jim! lol Sadly, he taught me a lot, too, but not usually good fun stuff. I found my marriage certainly didn't fit the mold ... or my dream. Still, I fought for it for nearly 20 years before I walked away, fearful that I would fall into the "mold" of the typical divorced woman. Another image I fought!

• My 3 kids entered this world loved. I've learned bunches from each of them, too, trying to discern their gifts and talents and steer them in their own individual path! I imagine I will continue to learn from them ... I tried to fit into the image I had of a perfect "mom," but ... I just didn't fit it! Then, for a time, I felt like a failure because I couldn't fit it ... sheesh!  So good to know that first, there is no such thing as a perfect mom or dad, and, secondly, since it doesn't exist, I don't have to fit it!  lol

• A company of delightful, fun, and amazing friends ... Someone told me one day when I wasn't thinking very well of myself, that if I line all my friends and family up in my imagination side by side, I will see a reflection of myself in them. Pretty good advice! This notion helped to re-adjust my thinking on a number of occasions.  Check it out!

 

I admit, however, that I'm the kind of person who is just arrogant enough to want to break through the expectations put on me by others.  I remember in 5th grade one day at recess ... (amazing what we remember, hmmm?) Anyway, it had snowed recently, and there was a large pile of snow beside the ball field. The other kids were playing kickball, but this one day, I didn't feel like playing kickball.  I felt like being by myself.  I wandered toward the pile and packed a snow ball, then pensively began to "carve" it with my mittened thumb. My teacher, Mrs. Hornbeck, slowly walked over and asked if I was OK. She interrupted my solitude and it irritated me.  I wanted to be alone. She was concerned for my well-being. Now, if it had been this way everyday, there might be cause for concern, but it wasn't everyday ... just once in a while. She coerced me into joining the kickball game. Fun ... but it wasn't what I wanted to do on that day. Point is ... she misjudged what I was doing and what I needed at the time by putting her expectations on me. 

 

How often do we "coerce" others into some image we have for them?

 

OK ... I digress ... There was a time when my parents were my identity. Then, my college was my chosen identity and I wore it like a badge of honor.  I joined the Army, rebelliously breaking from the path my parents and others may have set for me.  I was offered a commission, but declined it.  I wanted to be respected for my personal performance, not because of the insignia on my collar, so I didn't really fit the military images either.

 

Politics ... religion ... socio-economic ... education ... So many criteria we use to judge and categorize people.  Just like you, I am an individual with personal likes and dislikes, strong opinions, convictions, and beliefs. I've ALIVE ... imperfect ... flawed ... changing ... growing ... challenging ... seeking ... and I care for people ... for individuals. Just when you think you have me figured out ... BOOM!  I'll do or say something that doesn't seem to line up. Have I suddenly changed, or am I still me being me? What's my identity!

 

I tend to become defensive when I, or someone I care about, is "coerced" into something they may not want or believe.  With all the political JUNK going on these days, there is a lot of prejudice.  A few days ago, I wrote a piece about my stand about Iraq.  You may disagree with me, but it is inaccurate to toss me into the pile of "ignorant, uninformed, unthinking Americans" (or other such labels) just because my viewpoint differs from yours.  The same applies to personal, spiritual beliefs.  I happen to believe that Jesus is God incarnate, now residing, by means of the Holy Spirit, within humans who admit their need for Him ... but that doesn't mean I embrace every theological, behavioral, or hypocritical doctrine that you may ascribe to "Christians." 

 

Bottom line? None of us belong in a box. I try not to put my expectations on others or afix premature labels on others for my convenience. Please try to return the favor. This is ME ... feeling my way through this life, mistakes and all! OK? Thanks for your indulgence!  ;)

 

~ B

Have written this bout two years ago. I'm bringing it here because of a friend whose attitude in life runs contrary to everything my mother has taught me.
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PREJUDICE


EXPECTATIONS

I start out with a set of expectations for every new experience coming my way. But almost always these expectations get dumped or brushed aside because something else is being formed or brought forth holding its own distinct wonder and flavor. So if I so stubbornly held on to my expectations, it would have come out in a far different way. It would then be something that was according to ‘my’ wants, ‘my’ set of parameters or conditions, and ‘my’ desired results. Where is the thrill in that? ‘Expectations’ rob the thrill off a new experience. Yes, they do. And if you’re going to say that one can’t detach himself from having expectations on anything new, I’ll say yes to that, but…..let those expectations be tempered with knowing that things will happen when they happen without any help from you. So don’t try to color it with setting down expectations, yours, for it to arrive at ‘your’ desired results. Let the new experience ride. Let it reveal to you its wonder, beauty, joy, magic, adventure, delight, wisdom, truth in its own distinct way. Let it perhaps squeeze out of you feelings which you may have forgotten or have chosen to ignore. Let it alter some old preconceived notions about things and people and make you see that perhaps you have been wrong about them after all? Expectations are good but don’t let it stand in the way of wonder and learning.

IN LIFE THERE ARE NO GUARANTEES

A big yes to that one. You can’t really be too sure that your job would last you forever (can you?), that nothing will go wrong, that it won’t rain on your parade, or that your fortunes will stay strong, or that your health will not fail one day, or that no one will oppose your plans, or that your daughters will marry good men (ugh! Wish I knew). There is no guarantee that it won’t. So if that is the case, why continue with this business of living? Well, for the simple reason that because of its uncertainties, we are thus pushed to enjoy what we have ---do what we can with what we have now. There is wisdom in that. That means then to do whatever it is you do now with everything you’ve got. Be the best. Give it your best shot. Value the people you are with and treasure every precious moment that goes by. Relish beauty where you find it. Learn well whatever there is to learn. Love well when love finds you. So if and when one day things do go wrong cause there’s no guarantee that it won’t, you can look back with a smile and say ‘I did my best’…. And best is always good.

LIFE IS A POT OF STEW

Do you know what goes in a pot of stew? I’m not a cook but I can see that bits and pieces of all sorts go into it. You’ve got meat, vegetables, spices, water, etc. And it all gets mixed up together and the fire cooks it up to just right. So is life. We too get all bits and pieces of all sorts of things and experiences which get intertwined in our lives each day. We get knocked up and down and around in that mix which then makes us lose our bearing or hold in life. Easily we can lose ourselves in it. But wait! It doesn’t happen for no good reason. Look hard, think hard. Every bit of what may seem ‘scrap’ to you – bits here and there – are actually lending interest to the whole of things. Get it? Those odds and ends are just the spice that livens up your life. Every different thing in that odd mix makes its own contribution to the whole effort --- life! And what creates it into a delicious whole? Attitude – it’s the fire that cooks it up to just right. It helps us appreciate hidden beauty and truths, makes us see where true value lies, and delight in the way it all blends up to create a delicious sumptuous pot of stew – yes, life is a pot of stew. 

I rest my pen at this point. Maya thinks I write quite long. Lol Or maybe I do-- So then--- bye for a bit. God bless you.

http://www.humanitas-international.org/showcase/chronography/documents/luther-jews.htm