Petty @ MindSay

So, I'm back from my monthly hair appointment in Aiken.  My mom picked me up from campus after my only Friday class.  On the way my mom was talking back and forth with my dad and the insurance company (to get the insurance on the Jeep that they are giving me).  The we got home and my dad called to give her the last bit of information she needed for insurance and then told me I had to come there and ask my step-mother for the Jeep.

::Ask?  I have to ask for a raggedy piece of shit that could conk out on me at any minute that you're only giving me because the  oldest "in wedlock" child does't want it?  Ask, when you already promised that I could have a  brand new car when I got a job, but when I got it, deny that you even said that?::

I'm desparate, I suppose,  so I said that I would the next day, because my mom was going to be gone (with the car I'd use to get there) by the time my step-mom got home from drill (her rank is 2nd Lieutenant in the Navy).  So, I went when he told me to 6-7 that night.  As usual, I went to my grandmother's house first...because it has a looped driveway so I won't have to back out into the road, and because, well, to but it blatantly, I love her more and I know she loves me more.  So, I'm not there for a good five minutes when my cousin comes over and says that my dad just left (with his family) to get something to eat.  I decide I'll wait, thinking that they're just going to get something and come back.  Then, while waiting I get a text from my youngest sister telling me that they are at O'Charleys and she invited me to come.  I kindly declined and then went home.  Haven't talked to my dad, who not only left in the time frame that he told me to be there, but left when I got there (he lives right next door to my grandmother and I seriously doubt he missed a big-ass red Explorer). 

So, anyway, I went home.  My brother had my wild little cousin from Williston (ugh, Williston) there so I went into my mom's room to tell her what happened.  My mom, as usual when I tell her something, first supports the other person, then supports me a little, and finally supports me wholly.  I'll elaborate...I walk in and she asks what happened and I tell her.  She then asks first and foremost where I went first.  So I tell her that I went to my grandma's and she goes on to say that I should have went to my Dad's house first because he told me to be there and so on. (supporting the other person) So, I tell her that I didn't do anything wrong and that she wasn't going to make me feel like I did, and walked into my room.  My brother and cousin were playing hide and seek so I gave a little warning before I turned on my bedroom light.  Soon after my mom alerts my cousin that his mom is outside, after that she comes into my room.  "They just want you to beg for that piece of shit.  I know you didn't do anything wrong, I was just letting you know what they were gonna say." (supporting me a little)  A little after that, we all went out to get Chinese food.  On the way back, she said "They just want you to bed for that raggedy shit, they know they're doing you wrong.  He was supposed to have already bought you a new car. I don't know why outside children always get treated wrong...(goes onto talking about her husband not wanting to buy his other son a car, etc)...Don't worry about it...(goes onto saying how she can get a car for me, which is debatable)." (supporting me wholly)

I guess the whole children getting treated bad really gave my mom an itch because she had a little discussion with my great-grandmother about how she treats her uncle (my great-grandmother's son).  I don't have time to tell the whole thing (I've tried typing it twice, it just doesn't relay).

Anyway, I'm home now.  No Jeep, but, oh well, who's to say that's a bad thing.  I missed you all.  Couldn't get online there because my brother broke the broadband!

Throughout the building of my business (A Mountain Escape Day Spa), I have had a lot of wonderful support from my community.  I plan to have a little something for everyone here...Not just a day spa, but also art shows, yoga classes, art classes, photography classes, space for meetings, etc.  Everyone has been very excited!

Until one person threw a monkey wrench in the works...for what reason, I'm not exactly sure .  I certainly hope they had a good one, because it might destroy something I have put everything that I have into (a mere two weeks before my opening).

So, my future rests precariously on the edge at the moment.  I will try to get things staightened out tomorrow, but if the worst-case scenario comes to pass (and I cannot open my business for 4-6 months), things could get pretty scary and might even be lost altogether. 

I am an optimist, however, and believe that, whatever the reason is for this obstable being placed in my path, it will ultimately be for good.  I accept responsibility for my part in this misfortune, and I forgive whoever triggered its occurrence.  I would like to believe that they honestly did not know how vast the repercussions could be.

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Believe.

My sister is getting a nice new digital camera for Christmas.

 

From the age of thirteen until I got my shit together and moved at the age of nineteen, I asked for a camera every year. Fuck, I almost went to school for Photography, I got accepted. They wouldn't even buy me one then.

 

She's getting a new one for Christmas. To replace the one they got her last year.

 

 

 

I got a pair of socks and a Pink Floyd shirt.

I fucking hate this time of year.

I've finally decided that everyone hates me because I'm a "bitch" but no one really has good enough reasons why I'm such a bitch. I'm still trying to figure out why certain girls from my floor last year consider me a bitch, why the roommates have it out to get me and now, here's the newest member to the "lets hate Caroline" club, Alyssa. She lives on Katie's floor this year in dearborn and I got this message from her on myspace today stating...this...

so um its cool how u pretend to be friends w/me and then when its looking back and saying how u love the ppl from edinboro and im not in there thats real sweet! if u didnt want to be friends w/me u didnt have to pretend now it just comes back as u looking like a bitch so thanks for helping me realize that! good bye

I was highly confused when I saw this, so I wrote one back saying, what the heck are you talking about, I'm confused and I never hated you so please explain. I sent it, then decided since I was already on myspace to change my picture. I then realized what she was talking about. I have this thing in my about me section that says, "I love the dearborn kids" Then it has all their names there...well Alyssa's name wasn't there because I hadn't really met her yet, or even really know who she was. I'm also not one to change the "about me" section of my myspace every time something new comes into my life.

I can't handle the fact that people are so petty about myspace, I also can't handle the fact that I just recieved a message like that. I think it's "cool" on her part if she still thinks I'm a bitch and doesn't want to talk to me, there's actually becoming less and less reasons why I should go back to Edinboro...don't worry Kev, I'm still coming back because hopefully you're not in the "lets all HATE Caroline for petty reasons" club!

"Cocksucker."

"Whore."

 

Back and forth it went, and nothing changed at all.

My pipe was still broken and he was still spouting off bullshit, dodging the responsibilty as per usual.

Fucking trash, that's what you are. Fucking trash.