Patience @ MindSay 
god
Library Game
Let's play a game:
You pretend that you're a librarian (if you think you're pretty fabulous then pretend you're me, otherwise, any old librarian will do).
Now, I will be Joe Customer.
Here's the scenario: you are sitting at your information desk, happily waiting for a customer to approach you. Because it is over the lunch hour, your coworker is away from the desk and you are working alone. The laws of inevitability show that this is when you are going to be busy. Naturally, the phone begins ringing off the hook and the people are standing 4 deep (so far) at your desk, waiting for assistance. Lucky for me, I am first in line!
You: How can I help you?
JoeCustomer: Um, yeah, can I reserve a book?
You: Of course, what's the title of the book?
JC: Um, it's by Vince Flynn
You: And what's the title?
JC: Um, The Third Option?
You: Is that a question? (Okay, I want to point out that you probably shouldn't SAY that, even if you think it....)
You: *typing frantically* I'm sorry, all of our copies are currently checked out, would you like me to request it from another library?
JC: Um, sure I guess.
You: Great! (for some reason you seem to think being cheerful makes others sound less idiotic--hate to break it to you, that's not true--and you seem to be going for broke on this one) May I see your library card?
JC: Yeah, um, okay.
{You are now staring at JC as she digs through her purse. And staring. And waiting. And feeling the line behind her growing restless as she sorts through the most HUMONGOUS pile of papers and cards you've ever seen; finally in desperation you say}
You: Can I look you up by your name?
JC: Just hang on, I know it's in here somewhere.
You: It isn't a problem, if you'll just give me your name I can go ahead and look you up that way.
JC: *muttering* Damn. Where did I put that stupid card?
You: It sure is unbelievable how many cards you get these days, hmm? (trying your damndest to make conversation and hopefully stop a riot).
JC: Well, I pulled it out because I knew I would need it.
You: (somewhat shocked because people NEVER seem to realize they will need a library card at the library) Did you check your pockets?
JC: Just hang on
You: Maybe I could help the next person in line while you look?
JC: Hold on a sec
You: You know, .....
JC: (interrupting) I found it!
You: (quickly finishing the transaction) okay, thanks so much, is there anything else I can do? (fingers crossed, praying JC says no)
JC: No (walks away without so much as a thank you)
You: Thanks for waiting, how can I help you? (to the next customer, let's call him BillCustomer)
BC: Yeah, that was annoying, huh?
You: (smiling) I do appreciate your patience. {by the way nice work dodging that question} What can I do for you?
BC: Any idea how long the wait is for Dan Brown's new one?
You: I get asked that a lot. It is over 2,300 people.
BC: (sighing) Ah, well, go ahead and add me I suppose.
You: Sure thing, can I just see your library card?
BC: (pulls out a bulging wallet) Yep (starts flipping through) How many copies does the library own?
You: About 350 but I think they're ordering more.
BC: Crazy how many people want that book, isn't it?
---by now you are ready to bang your head against the wall--
Why can't people just be prepared?
Is it that hard to have your library card ready to use when you are approaching a live person? There is very little I help people with that I don't, at some point, end up asking for their library card. And they are ALWAYS surprised by it. I just don't get it.....
Do these people also stand in the checkout lane at a store and wonder why they can't find their check card?
What is amazing to me is that if you're standing in a line and you are watching someone dig for their library card and it is annoying to you that they weren't prepared, wouldn't you make absolutely certain that you are all set when it is your turn?????
People, I tell ya. Their idiosynchrasies are a constant source of amusement to me.
How did you like being a librarian? If you managed to suppress the urge to rip your hair out of your scalp, then you win. If you didn't, then, in addition to being bald, you have lost my little game. Better luck next time!
You pretend that you're a librarian (if you think you're pretty fabulous then pretend you're me, otherwise, any old librarian will do).
Now, I will be Joe Customer.
Here's the scenario: you are sitting at your information desk, happily waiting for a customer to approach you. Because it is over the lunch hour, your coworker is away from the desk and you are working alone. The laws of inevitability show that this is when you are going to be busy. Naturally, the phone begins ringing off the hook and the people are standing 4 deep (so far) at your desk, waiting for assistance. Lucky for me, I am first in line!
You: How can I help you?
JoeCustomer: Um, yeah, can I reserve a book?
You: Of course, what's the title of the book?
JC: Um, it's by Vince Flynn
You: And what's the title?
JC: Um, The Third Option?
You: Is that a question? (Okay, I want to point out that you probably shouldn't SAY that, even if you think it....)
You: *typing frantically* I'm sorry, all of our copies are currently checked out, would you like me to request it from another library?
JC: Um, sure I guess.
You: Great! (for some reason you seem to think being cheerful makes others sound less idiotic--hate to break it to you, that's not true--and you seem to be going for broke on this one) May I see your library card?
JC: Yeah, um, okay.
{You are now staring at JC as she digs through her purse. And staring. And waiting. And feeling the line behind her growing restless as she sorts through the most HUMONGOUS pile of papers and cards you've ever seen; finally in desperation you say}
You: Can I look you up by your name?
JC: Just hang on, I know it's in here somewhere.
You: It isn't a problem, if you'll just give me your name I can go ahead and look you up that way.
JC: *muttering* Damn. Where did I put that stupid card?
You: It sure is unbelievable how many cards you get these days, hmm? (trying your damndest to make conversation and hopefully stop a riot).
JC: Well, I pulled it out because I knew I would need it.
You: (somewhat shocked because people NEVER seem to realize they will need a library card at the library) Did you check your pockets?
JC: Just hang on
You: Maybe I could help the next person in line while you look?
JC: Hold on a sec
You: You know, .....
JC: (interrupting) I found it!
You: (quickly finishing the transaction) okay, thanks so much, is there anything else I can do? (fingers crossed, praying JC says no)
JC: No (walks away without so much as a thank you)
You: Thanks for waiting, how can I help you? (to the next customer, let's call him BillCustomer)
BC: Yeah, that was annoying, huh?
You: (smiling) I do appreciate your patience. {by the way nice work dodging that question} What can I do for you?
BC: Any idea how long the wait is for Dan Brown's new one?
You: I get asked that a lot. It is over 2,300 people.
BC: (sighing) Ah, well, go ahead and add me I suppose.
You: Sure thing, can I just see your library card?
BC: (pulls out a bulging wallet) Yep (starts flipping through) How many copies does the library own?
You: About 350 but I think they're ordering more.
BC: Crazy how many people want that book, isn't it?
---by now you are ready to bang your head against the wall--
Why can't people just be prepared?
Is it that hard to have your library card ready to use when you are approaching a live person? There is very little I help people with that I don't, at some point, end up asking for their library card. And they are ALWAYS surprised by it. I just don't get it.....
Do these people also stand in the checkout lane at a store and wonder why they can't find their check card?
What is amazing to me is that if you're standing in a line and you are watching someone dig for their library card and it is annoying to you that they weren't prepared, wouldn't you make absolutely certain that you are all set when it is your turn?????
People, I tell ya. Their idiosynchrasies are a constant source of amusement to me.
How did you like being a librarian? If you managed to suppress the urge to rip your hair out of your scalp, then you win. If you didn't, then, in addition to being bald, you have lost my little game. Better luck next time!
Revolting, Worried, and Getting Impatient...
I feel so uncomfortable today. I can't find anything to wear, it all just feels annoying. I don't really feel like doing anything, either. The boyfriend has been feeling unsociable lately, and has been playing xbox for the past 3 days...
He says it's probably a phase, and that he finds everyone -not just me- revolting.
Which, I can partly understand because I felt like that before. But... it's still worrying me, and it's upsetting to know he's on xbox all day, and doesn't feel like talking to me.
He told me to be patient. I'm trying...
He says it's probably a phase, and that he finds everyone -not just me- revolting.
Which, I can partly understand because I felt like that before. But... it's still worrying me, and it's upsetting to know he's on xbox all day, and doesn't feel like talking to me.
He told me to be patient. I'm trying...
Art Show
When I was little, art was pretty much the worst period of the day. I didn't have any natural talent (I lack a lot of spatial reasoning and depth perception, key ingredients to being the next Van Gogh), and the teacher was lackluster. The most memorable things from art in elementary school are: trying to draw a bowl of fruit in the middle of the room, and the time she got so mad at a student, she threw a stapler at him. The rest of that year (3rd grade? 2nd?) we just didn't have art.
Art up here is different. The art teacher at three of the elementary schools, Polly... is amazing. She is so knowledgeable, and so talented, but she can break things down so everyone can do them. Even my A, who struggles with so much, has created some beautiful work with her. Today was the big art show, where the walls were DRIPPING with examples of art from all the students at these schools between 1st grade and 6th. I am going to post different examples of things she's gotten them to do this year. Elementary school kids, mind you. All of it better than I could ever hope to dream of producing. Absolutely incredible.
(Fuck this, I can't get it to upload pictures I just wasted half an hour creating a Flickr to post, so here are links to the pictures, do with them what you will)
Jayden, 2nd grade. Symmetry.
Hayley, 4th grade. Cow picture.
Heather, 5th grade. Early ships watercolor painting.
Gwyneth, 2nd grade. Robot shapes and joints.
Eli, 6th grade. Gradating color.
Levin, 6th grade. Sculpture.
Roxy, 6th grade. Sculpture.
Nathan, 5th grade. Print making.
Torsten, 4th grade. Wax resisting.
Emma, 6th grade. Sculpture.
Austin, 6th grade. Scratch art.
Bennett, 2nd grade. Robot.
Emily, 5th grade. Repousse.
James, 3rd grade. Negative space.
Art up here is different. The art teacher at three of the elementary schools, Polly... is amazing. She is so knowledgeable, and so talented, but she can break things down so everyone can do them. Even my A, who struggles with so much, has created some beautiful work with her. Today was the big art show, where the walls were DRIPPING with examples of art from all the students at these schools between 1st grade and 6th. I am going to post different examples of things she's gotten them to do this year. Elementary school kids, mind you. All of it better than I could ever hope to dream of producing. Absolutely incredible.
(Fuck this, I can't get it to upload pictures I just wasted half an hour creating a Flickr to post, so here are links to the pictures, do with them what you will)
Jayden, 2nd grade. Symmetry.
Hayley, 4th grade. Cow picture.
Heather, 5th grade. Early ships watercolor painting.
Gwyneth, 2nd grade. Robot shapes and joints.
Eli, 6th grade. Gradating color.
Levin, 6th grade. Sculpture.
Roxy, 6th grade. Sculpture.
Nathan, 5th grade. Print making.
Torsten, 4th grade. Wax resisting.
Emma, 6th grade. Sculpture.
Austin, 6th grade. Scratch art.
Bennett, 2nd grade. Robot.
Emily, 5th grade. Repousse.
James, 3rd grade. Negative space.
Minding 3 year olds and their pets
My 3 year old son loves to touch everything, especially tiny living things like worms and goldfish. We have both at our house. The worms are in our front yard and surface by the dozens after a rainstorm. For the fish, I buy feeder fish (12 for $1.00) to keep in an inexpensive, basic aquarium. My total investment for fish was less than $20 and it keeps him amused everyday. However, I was raised as a compassionate person who knows these are living creatures who don't deserve to be poked, stuffed in a bottle, thrown in a bathtub, and otherwise treated unethically. My conscience tells me to take the fish away until my son is older and more understanding. But my heart loves to see him play and laugh and talk to the fish. He does his best to take care of them (as only a 3 year old could) and he doesn't intentionally hurt them. He proclaims himself a "fish expert" and tells me he knows everything about fish. He helped me put gravel, plants, and driftwood in the aquarium. He feeds them daily and helps me change the water weekly. I feel he's learning more about nature and science than 1000 trips to SeaWorld. And yet.... I still feel great remorse when one of them dies an untimely death. As with everything with kids, there's no easy answer. All I can do as a parent is continue to play referee and make sure the fish get their fair share in this game of life.
The need to achieve
I figured something out about myself - the reason certain things get to me (can't drive, get relationship, get decent job) - all seems to revolve around needing to prove to myself that I can do these things. I know there's no sense in comparing myself to other people, and I tell myself that, but I just cannot help it, it just isn't going away, so the only 2 options I really have left is to continue as is or do something about it. The more I appreciate + recognise the work and skill that goes into other jobs the more I feel the need to prove to myself that I can do it too, and it's wierd that I've completely satisfied myself in science but not on much more common things that people do everyday.
I'm not totally at the bottom, and some things I have proved to myself;
- I can live alone, did for a year at uni (so that doesn't even worry me)
- I've achieved a good degree in a good subject!
- I can get job interviews (the ones I've had and samaritans selection)
- I have a job
- I can win friends
- I can get a bit of interest from girls (and the odd guy!)
- I can get anything (normal) that only has a financial price (anything material, whenever - so something like a new computer or gadget, doesn't matter, because I know I could get it if I wanted)
I might have to do some illogical things to prove stuff to myself - like get different jobs, even though what I have might be better... but I know I can run 2 jobs at once for a few months at least... then I'd know if it was right to change
I feel a lot better now that I know why it is! I also got reassurance from remembering something I said as a chem student when helping friends (we all helped each other) - that anyone can learn/do anything, as long as they give themselves time and patience. With that in mind, all I need is determination, and to want something (reasonable), and I can almost guarantee eventually I can get it, if it matters enough that I care...
All I really want is to feel on a par with normal human beings... so a deep routed inferiority complex (that causes my shyness) will end.
I'm not totally at the bottom, and some things I have proved to myself;
- I can live alone, did for a year at uni (so that doesn't even worry me)
- I've achieved a good degree in a good subject!
- I can get job interviews (the ones I've had and samaritans selection)
- I have a job
- I can win friends
- I can get a bit of interest from girls (and the odd guy!)
- I can get anything (normal) that only has a financial price (anything material, whenever - so something like a new computer or gadget, doesn't matter, because I know I could get it if I wanted)
I might have to do some illogical things to prove stuff to myself - like get different jobs, even though what I have might be better... but I know I can run 2 jobs at once for a few months at least... then I'd know if it was right to change
I feel a lot better now that I know why it is! I also got reassurance from remembering something I said as a chem student when helping friends (we all helped each other) - that anyone can learn/do anything, as long as they give themselves time and patience. With that in mind, all I need is determination, and to want something (reasonable), and I can almost guarantee eventually I can get it, if it matters enough that I care...
All I really want is to feel on a par with normal human beings... so a deep routed inferiority complex (that causes my shyness) will end.
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