Parenting @ MindSay 
How To Improve Your Childs Behavior
“Is Your Child's Bickering, Tantrums, and Defiant Behavior Embarrassing You, Destroying Your Home, and Making You Feel Like a Failure as a Parent?"
“Who Else Wants to End Their Child's Fighting, Arguing, and Talking Back Once and for All?"
“This is not some quick fix gimmick, nor is it my “amazing” discovery. This is a time tested step-by-step child discipline program used in clinics around the world. And it is the most effective relationship building method available anywhere”
-Anthony Kane, MD
"I was dreading the future,but with your help I do not feel the need to want to 'run away from it all' now! Many thanks!" Michele P., Chicago |
It is sad to say, but most mothers of ADHD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, or just plain difficult children feel completely helpless.
Some mothers even hope that the defiance is just a stage that their child will out grow.
But Let’s Be Honest About This…
FACT: 50% of all ADHD children have a problem with defiant behavior
FACT: 75% of Oppositional Defiant Disorder children above the age of eight will still be defiant later in life
FACT: Once children enter the teen years it is almost impossible for parents to change their child's difficult behavior
What Does This Mean?
It means that if your child is among the 15% of children who have ADHD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, or defiant child behavior, the problem is not going to go away by itself.
How Much of This is True for You?
Is your child’s defiant behavior is running you ragged?
Is your child is ruining your home?
Is your child’s defiant behavior is straining your marriage?
Do you dread what your child will do next?
Does your child’s rotten behavior makes you feel like you are failing as a parent?
Do you feel helpless to correct your child’s conduct?
Are you frustrated by your child’s defiance?
Are your child’s tantrums are destroying your life?
Do you lie in bed at night dreading tomorrow's fighting and screaming?
Does your child’s behavior makes you wish you could run away from your home?
Is your home is like a battlefield?
Do you feel like you are losing control over your child, your family, and your home?
Well, it is Not Going to Get Better by Itself
Your child is not going to grow out of it.
And if your child’s behavior is bothering you now, when he is young...
What Do You Think it Will be Like Living with a Defiant Teenager?
You must take control of your child’s behavior before it is too late!
But it’s not hard to do.It’s not complicated and anyone can do it
You Just Have to Learn How
"Are You Worried Enough About Your Child's Behavior to Do Something About It?"
If you need to teach your difficult or defiant child to behave AND your child is between the ages of 3-12, then there is still a lot that you can do.
"You Can Teach Your Difficult or Defiant Child Better Behavior"
You will learn how to do this when you
| How to Improve Your Child's Behavior "The definitive program on how to teach Your Difficult Child better behavior and to help you become a more effective parent." |
"Learn the Secret of
How to Eliminate Defiant Behavior in Your Home"
| "I would like to thank you for the help you have given both to me and my son. I have seen a big difference in my son for the better. Thanks to you, my life is much easier already." Maria J., Buenos Aires "I'm an MD, an adult psychiatrist. I have a wonderful 7 year old girl, but I'm convinced that she's 'just not wired right.' I am trying to help her but there's such a quagmire of information in the field and so many approaches that I'm confused and overwhelmed. "I stumbled upon your site accidentally... I could not stop reading. I enrolled in both How to Improve Your Child's Behavior and How to Help the Child You Love. This program is the God-send that I've been praying for. Your ability to synthesize and make sense of so much material is invaluable. I am in awe of what you have accomplished. I look forward to learning everything I can from you. Thanks to you, I already know the direction I need to go in. Paula C., MD St. Louis |
 | I’m Anthony Kane, physician, former director of special education at our local elementary school, author of a book, a number of courses, and numerous articles about ADHD, ODD, and child raising. I am an international lecturer and public speaker on the topics of ADHD, ODD, child behavior, and learning disabilities. I am also the father of two children with ADHD. I have been speaking with and advising parents throughout the world about how to handle their ADHD and defiant children for more than a decade. So I have seen what things works and what things don’t work. I have tried them at home. I have shared and experienced the pain of parents whose children constantly argue and fight with them. |
So let me ask you some straight questions…
Is raising your defiant child causing too much stress in your life?
Would you like to put an end to your child’s talking back?
Are you tired of your child interrupting you when you are doing something important?
Are you tired of dreading what your child will do next?
Is a healthy relationship with your child important to you?
Would you like quiet and peaceful home?
Would you like to be able to talk and have your child listen?
Would you like to have a child who is obedient and not defiant?
Would you like to feel like you are the one running the home and not your ADHD, ODD, or difficult child?
Do you want the confidence of knowing what to do to handle your child's defiance?
"Discover the Secrets that Every Successful Mother Understands"
"Do You Want to Know the Quickest Way to End Difficult Child Behavior?"
Then you must
| How to Improve Your Child's Behavior "The definitive program on how to teach Your Difficult Child better behavior and to help you become a more effective parent." |
Put an End to Child Behavior Problems Right Now! This Amazing 100% Guaranteed System is Fast and Easy You Can Learn it in Minutes and it Works Right Away!
Ever fall for that one? It is what we are all looking for with our children, right? Fast. Easy. Quick results. No work. Just plug your child into the behavior program and "1-2-3 poof" he will stop being defiant and just sit quietly on your shelf until you are ready to take him down for dinner. From Defiant Child to Instant Angel.
But let me ask you this...
If someone were to try to sell you his “3 Steps to Millions” program would you believe him? Would you buy a “Complete Car Repair in One Easy Lesson” manual? How about a “Learn to Pilot a Twin Engine Jet in 5 Minutes” book? You understand that complicated problems never have fast easy solutions.
Do you really believe that all your difficult child needs is a quick fix?
There are no instant answers and there is no effortless program!
If that what you are looking for you are not going to find it. I don’t care what promises anyone makes.
"But if You Truly Care About Your Child and You are Willing to Invest the Few Minutes a Day That it Will Take, Then You Will be Able to…
- End the defiance, battles and vicious fighting in your home
- Fix your relationship with your child
- Bring peace and happiness to your home
- Enjoy a more fulfilling relationship with your child
- Have your child respect you
- Regain control over your child, you life and your home
- Put an to all the arguing, fighting, and talking back
- Have your child obey you without complaining
- Get rid of all the hostility
- Gain absolute confidence as a parent and know how to handle any situation
| "I am finding this course very helpful in learning to deal effectively with our ODD child. We are looking forward to a very successful year in school as well! Thanks for all your help." Mary Beth H., St. John's "Since starting your program we have noticed a dramatic improvement in our daughter's behaviour. We have used your principles on many occasions, all to great effect! I cannot believe how something so truly simple can have such an unbelievably positive impact! Please keep up the good work." Alice L., Hong Kong |
This is the same program that is used successfully in the best private clinics throughout the world
Now it is an online course and it is available to you
"You Will Discover Remarkable Ways to Get Your Difficult Child to Obey You"
But this is not just a course on discipline.
How to Improve Your Child's Behavior is a program about relationships.
Enroll In This Course and you will learn how to develop a stronger more loving relationship with your child.
Your child will want to obey you. Not because he is afraid you will punish, but because
Your Child Will Want to Make You Happy
Do you know that
- Your child wants to make you happy
- Your child wants your love
- Your child needs your guidance.
- Your child wants you to be proud of him and happy that he is your child.
By the end of the program your child will want to obey you.
Not because he knows you will punish. But because the nature of your relationship will be such that your child will want your approval.
This is not to say that you will never need to discipline.
Discipline is part of parenting and the course deals with discipline extensively.
How to Improve Your Child's Behaviortakes you step-by-step and helps you build a strong, healthy parent-child relationship.
This is what makes the How to Improve Your Child's Behavior program unique.
Most behavior programs just focus on discipline to crush difficult behavior.
Sure, you can force your child to listen to you while he is still young and still afraid of you.
But what happens when your child becomes a teenager?
This fear goes away. Then your child will run wild and there is NOTHING that you can do.
Do you want to have some control over your child when he is a teenager?
Then you need to prepare for the future now!
"Do You Want a Strong Relationship with Your Child, a Relationship that You will Have Throughout Your Life?"
Then
Enroll Now In
How to Improve Your Child's Behavior
So maybe you are thinking,
"This can’t possibly work for my difficult child."
Let me explain:
How to Improve Your Child's Behavior is based upon principles of basic human nature.
These principles are universal.
That means it does not matter who you are or where you live, this program will work for you.
These principles worked a thousand years ago and these principles will work a thousand years from now.
How to Improve Your Child's Behavior is already working for 2157 parents around the world
And it Will Work for You, Too.
| "We seem to be having a breakthrough in the behavior patterns here. Your program has been a tremendous help to me giving some structure to what I was trying apply." Caroline R., Dallas "Weare already seeing the positive effect in giving our daughter her "special time". We are also feeling that it is a Patricia M., Melbourne "We are 100% satisfied with the course and its content. Since starting we have noticed a big improvement in our son's behavior, we have used your principles on many occasions, all to great effect! Thank you." Melissa P., Boca Raton |
Here is What You Get:
When you enroll you will receive by email twenty-two weekly lessons designed to help you build a better relationship with your child.
Here is Just Some of What You Will Learn
- The ONE universal underlying principal that will transform the most unruly head strong monster into a loving obedient child. (It is amazing how so few parents know about this, especially since it is so easy to apply and any parent can do it.)
- 4 mistakes that erode your parental power and encourage defiance (Almost every parent is doing one of these.)
- 4 common errors that will demolish your authority and almost force your child to rebel. (Eliminate these 4 errors and your discipline problems will melt away forever)
- How to talk so your child will listen
- How to handle your child in any situation - anytime and anywhere. (You will always know exactly what to do. You will gain absolute confidence as a parent.)
- How to uproot defiant behavior at its roots
- How to eliminate talking back once and for all. (Almost everybody gets this wrong)
- One easy to use secret that will teach your child to obey your requests
- The one surefire technique to ensure your child will never interrupt you
- 8 keys to uproot relapses in bad behavior (Master this and you will have your child under control for years to come.)
- The one most powerful secret you must know to raise your child effectively. (Learn this and you will almost never need to use punishment again. Ignore it and not only will you be punishing much more, but also no punishment, reproof, or penalty will have any long term effect on your child.)
| "We've had so much success with your program that we really haven't had to implement any of the discipline ideas. Our home is a much more peaceful and happy place. Thank you." Shirley B., Erie "I am so delighted to have started this program. I am actually beginning to enjoy more of what parenthood has to offer." Donna K., Cedar Rapids |
Here is What Else You Will Discover
- What you may be doing that almost forces your children to fight with each other. (If your house is a nightmare, this may be why.)
- 15 surefire techniques that will almost instantly transform how your child responds to you
- One simple "game" that will teach your child to obey you. (Your child will do whatever you ask, and he will think he is playing.)
- How to give effective commands (Learn these 4 secrets and your child will rush to listen.)
- 8 hidden keys that guarantee that your child will continue to obey you throughout his childhood. (Yes- even when he is a teenager.)
- Right and wrong ways to discipline- the secrets that will help you direct your child
- How to leverage your child's inherent nature to mold him into the loving obedient child of your dreams. (Master this and you will transform your child. This is powerful and it is universal. It will work with any child and in any society. - And no, your child is not different.)
- Why almost no child discipline program can work for long, even if it works at first (In the end you will be left where you started- or worse! Just ask anyone who has tried one of them.)
- How you may be forcing your child to fight with you, and what you can do to change it
- The 5 essential steps to ensure your child listen to your commands
- How to eliminate all the talking back and arguing and hostility and regain your warm loving relationship with your child. (There is nothing more important than this for both you and your child.)
Also, You Will Get...
- Simple easy to carry out weekly exercises guaranteed to change the way your child behaves.
- Unlimited online help whenever you need it and as often as you need it
- Support and feedback to help you carry out the program properly
- Answers to your questions when you need them
Because you must have everything you need to help your child. Enroll Now and you will get a one year subscription to the
ADD ADHD Advances online journal
(value $75)
ADHD and ODD treatment is rapidly changing. You need to be on top of what is happening in order to help your child.
Also, I am giving you the Special Reports:
How to Read a Scientific Article
(value $35)
There is a lot of rhetoric in the health care right now. If you want to help your difficult child, you have to know how to tell what is true from what is hype.
This report is worth $35. But you get it as our gift to you.
How to Create and Emotional Bond with Your Child
(value $40)
The most powerful tool that parents have for raising their children is the natural emotional bond that exists between them and their child. No child who feels a strong bond with his parents will risk losing this connection by disobeying.
In this special report you will learn exactly what to do to enhance this bond.
How to Help Your Child Make Friends
(value $35)
Our ADHD children have trouble making friends. As our children grow older, their social problems seem to get worse.
This special report gives you the ability to help your child succeed in making and keeping friends.
Plus If You Enroll Today You Will Get
Free Unlimited Consulting for One Year.
(value $500)
Let me stress the value of this.
Right now if you have a question or problem about how to deal with your child, who can you ask? Your child's pediatrician? His psychologist?
And even if you do have somebody that can help, how long do you need to wait to get an appointment? A week? A month?
And let's not forget the time spent going to the office and in the waiting room. And then, of course, there is that bill at the end.
When you enroll in How to Improve Your Child's Behavior you may contact me as often as you like and ask your questions. I will be there to help you. No appointments, no waiting in lines and no hefty bill at the end.
Why am I giving you such an opportunity?
Because I understand that parents have a lot of uncertainty when raising their difficult children. Believe me, I've been there. That is why I am making this offer and that is why I started ADD ADHD Advances.
However, please understand that my time is very limited. I can only offer the opportunity to personally help you with your child to a limited number of parents. As of today I still have some openings left. However, please understand that these spots will fill quickly.
If you enroll now I can make this offer to you.
This offer may not be available to you later.
And You Get My...
"Unconditional 110% Satisfaction, No-Hassle, Fifty-Six Day Money Back Risk-Free Double GUARANTEE"
|
Why am I offering such a strong guarantee?
Because, let’s face it. Unless you have heard me speak or read some of my articles you don’t know me.
I Don’t Want You to Risk Anything.
So enroll in the course, apply what you learn.
If you don’t see positive improvements in your child’s difficult behavior within the first eight weeks, simply let me know and I will refund your purchase price immediately.
No ifs, buts or maybes. No hidden clauses and no small print! You even get to keep all the Special Reports.
This program is completely Risk Free
Plus You Get
"The Confidence
That You are Raising Your Child Properly"
Most importantly you will get
"A Stronger More Loving Relationship
with Your Child"
The total value of this program is $882. However, for a limited time you can enroll in How to Improve Your Child's Behavior for only $882 $97.87
Why are You Getting Such a Big Discount?
Because, this program is becoming more and more popular and soon I will need to drastically limit the enrollment. My time is limited and I need to give every parent who enrolls my full attention so that we can quickly get their child under control.
For now, the enrollment is still open. However, I will be forced to make some radical changes in the near future. One change is to limit the enrollment. I will also be forced to raise the price of the program significantly.
This will mean that it will be no longer possible for many parents to participate in a program that I know will change their child's behavior and improve their lives.
However, I do not feel comfortable just closing the door on parents and children who need this help so badly.
Therefore, for a limited period of time I am offering the program at a discount so that those who could not otherwise afford the help they need can still participate and help their children.
This is All You Have to Do:
Click here and Enroll.
Every week you will receive the program by email
- Read the lessons
- Do the exercises
- Work at your own pace
- Ask your questions
- Begin to enjoy being a parent to your child
"Are You Worried Enough Yet About Your Child's Behavior to Do Something About It?"
Yes, Dr. Kane! I Want to Enroll in Your Program, How to Improve Your Child's Behavior Now! I need to arm myself with step-by-step information, practical tips and proven strategies guaranteed to help me get my child's difficult behavior under control... before it's too late. I understand you will send me instructions on how to get the full program immediately once my payment is processed, and that my personal information is private, safe and secure. I will get the following:
I understand that if I were take my child to a psychologist, a similar program could cost me $100 a week and over $2000 for the complete course. I appreciate that I am getting this entire program for less than the cost of two office visits. Plus, the program is guaranteed. I do not know of any other doctor or any clinic that will actually return my money if I am not happy. There is no way I can lose.
I understand that if I enroll today I still qualify for UNLIMITED consulting for one-year. I can contact you anytime I wish and as often as I wish to get answers to any and all of my questions. There will be no appointments, no waiting in lines, and no extra hidden charges. You will be there to give me and my family the help that we need. You said the value of this is $500, but I know that it is worth much, much more. Finally, I understand my investment is fully protected by your fifty-six day iron clad money back DOUBLE guarantee. If within 8 weeks I am not completely satisfied for any reason, I will contact you and receive a prompt refund: no hassles, no worries, and no quibbles. Here's How to Enroll...
Just Click Below to Use Our Safe and Secure Online Enrollment Form.
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Kid car seats are something that is usually overlooked by parents when they are cleaning their babys products. It is important that the seat is cleaned regularly for hygiene reasons. You should try your very best to wash it at least one time each and every month and possibly even more if needed.
Step 1 - Take the youngsters seat out of the vehicle, then you should position the seat lightly onto an old blanket or cloth outside the car. Before setting your car seat on a blanket etc give the seat a really good shake as this will dislodge any small crumbs etc. Before you clean the seat, make sure you have put all your babys toys and blankets etc away.
Step 2 - You should now be ready to hoover and wipe over the rear seat of your vehicle around where the baby car seat was fitted.
Step 3 - Pick up any crumbs from your youngsters travel seat with a vacuum cleaner, it would ideally be a hand held vacuum cleaner.
Step 4 - You can now clean all of the plastic bits of your childs car seat using some gentle soap and water. Before cleaning the plastic parts of the seat, you should have already disassembled the removeable bits of the kid car seat which should be wiped down separately. When you have finished cleaning each part of the safety seat, you can now put the parts back together and make sure that everything is as it should be.
Step 5 - Put the baby car seats cover in the washing machines gentle cycle if the cover can be detached. A tumble dryer could shrink your seat cover so be sure not to make the error of using it. Hang it out on your washing line instead of placing it in the tumble dryer. If the soap isn't compatible with the child seats fabric or the actual seat then this can cause some damage. Always check over the label prior to using any cleaning products.
Step 6 - If it is not possible to remove the car seat cover then just wipe the stained patches of the cover. Wipe down all the other parts of the child seat gently. Let any cleaning fumes out by keeping all your car doors wide open for two or more hours. Have a look over the guidelines for the cleaning soap to make sure you can use it to clean the child seat without damaging the seats material.
Step 7 - The arms of the child seat, the back, and bottom are areas that should be scrubbed well as these places get very dirty.
Step 8 - Your childs car toys can be just as dirty as the car seat so those should be thoroughly cleaned as well.
Step 9 - Secure the child seat back into the car. Always make sure you follow the manufacturers fitting instructions. Take your time when fitting travel baby car seats as it is very important you do everything right. Make sure all parts of the travel seat are present and correctly installed.
By Kerri Bullock
BabyOnTheGo - Our online baby store (www.babyonthego.co.uk)
First story was a 6 year old boy was suspended from school for 45 days for bringing a knife/spoon/fork that he got from the cub scouts to school. Now during the child's 45 day suspension he is supposed to attend an alternative disciplinary school. Seriously? the kid gets straight A's and he has never been in trouble before, and on top of that he's a cub scout. He didn't bring it to school with the attempt to harm someone and if his parents trust him with it why not just confiscate it and give it to them?? Someone posted on a facebook what kind of parent allows their child to have that? A parent responsible enough to teach the child how to use it. I had a teacher last year who used to teach at a disciplinary in upstate New York. Now these kids make the delinquents in my school look like cranky kinder gardeners throwing a temper tantrum. Now where they grow up hunting is a way of life, according to my teacher there was a two week period in which the students didn't come at all because it was hunting season. These kids have open access to the guns in their home and they are taught how to kill with them, guess how many were in that school for gun related altercations???? None. These kids were raised with a respect for guns. They were taken out on hunting trips when they were as young as 3 years old so they know its not a toy, they're parents would never accept them playing around with a gun or another humans life.
Story number two involves some elementary school kids learning a song about Barrack Obama and his policies. A group of protesters think that politics should be kept out of the classroom and that the song teaches the kids to idolize the president. That is just about the dumbest thing I've heard all week (so far, its only Wednesday). What happened to current events?? When I was in elementary school I had to do current events every night and I learned a song about Martin Luther King Jr (not exactly the same thing but stick with me here people). The song informs the students of what's going on today politically, they cry and whine about how younger generations are so unaware and how we (younger generation) are choosing to stay blind to these things but a catchy song is just the thing we need to jump start little kids interest in politics and news. I know that doing current events at first was the most tedious thing in the world to me but by the time I reached 3rd grade I would stay up til ten to watch the news because I had an after school program. I liked being informed and feeling smart, I liked being able to discuss my political stance with adults and them telling my parent I was a very bright child. Most adults aren't aware of Barrack Obama's political policies are, shouldn't we be applauding the students and not chastising them and their teachers because we may not agree????
And I'm a bit of a conspiracy theorist so the whole Michael Jackson dying story seems a little fishy to me. Ok so if he is dead and someone did murder him, who and why? Who stood to gain the most from Michael being dead? I don't know what his relations were like with his brothers but I'm pretty sure he was closest to janet and his mother so they wouldn't see to much gain from it: Janet makes her own money and he'd give his mom the world if she asked so I pick Joe. If anyone wanted Michael out of the way most it'd be him. Joe is no longer the belligerent jerk we all know him to be but the grieving father and I'm sure there is money to be had in there some way some how. His brothers are also suspect, honestly who here can name all of the other Jackson 5 members?? Not me. But, would one of them really kill their brother over jealousy and money, not likely and I'd know, I have a younger sister I'd sell if they'd let me. Then there's also the possibility he's not dead at all and hiding out somewhere. Michaels music and style has always been popular and probably always will be, but he hasn't been. People have songs, and jokes and comedy sketches dedicated to the fall of Michael Jackson. I don't give a shit dead or alive the guy is weird and I'm not going to take back my statements about him because he's dead. I do still believe he had the tendencies of a pedophile and I do believe he must have lost his god damn mind to destroy his face the way he did. I'm not falling for that "lost childhood" bull shit the Jackson's have been trying to push on people for years. Day after day kids in America are forced to grow up at younger ages because of situations that they are put in, now whether it makes you crazy or pushes you forward is up to you. Michael was going forward for awhile and then something broke in him, but they need to realize that's a reason not an excuse. I can't just go around punching people in the face, later telling them that I came from a broken home and expecting them to be less mad at me, now can I?? They want us as the American Public to rethink the way we treated him because he was the king of pop, but how would they feel about a math teacher touching on their child's goodies? We shouldn't feel guilty about our statements because they hurt his feelings and now he's dead, it was true, Michael for the past two decades has been the epitome of a freak. We (or at least, I) never said we hated Michael but its hard to accept him knowing what he'd become, it wasn't that we didn't understand him, it was that we were finally beginning to understand him personally and not liking what we were seeing.
Please Lord give me strength to make it through the next 3 weeks until school starts.
Please give me the patience to overlook the 3 slugs (aka my kids) who are imprisoned in the house because it’s literally a burning hell (temp wise) outside.
Please give me the fortitude to stay on their asses regarding cleaning up after themselves instead of doing it myself.
Please give me Zen to overlook the fact that I haven’t been alone in 2 ½ months.
Please give me perseverance in this parenting endeavor I’ve embarked on because I’m ready to throw in the towel.
Please give me optimism that things will get better… in about 3 weeks.
Please grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change (4 very different personalities trapped inside a becoming smaller and smaller house). The courage to change the things I can (my attitude, I’m putting on my happy face). And the wisdom to know the difference (and the peace that comes with knowing the end is near-only 3 more weeks!!!)
Thank you Lord.
What is with girls these days? And by these days, I mean since the dawn of time. I was doing some work around the house the other day when the phone rang. I didn’t even bother to attempt to answer it since my 11 year old daughter was in the house. It doesn’t surprise me in the least that the age of the phone planted to her ear has arrived in the house. I’m ok with that. Within 30 seconds of her phone conversation I hear her dishing about how so and so was online and talking trash about so and so. “She really said that. Can you believe that?” I hear. “I know I know right?” I hear.
Listening to this one sided conversation coming from my 11 year old had me disturbed. I’m not sure if I was more disturbed by her ending every sentence with “I know, right” or by the nature of the call. It is becoming more and more apparent that my 11 year old is one of those girls. And by one of those girls, I mean the gossipy, all about appearance, totally superficial type of girl. One of those girls. I can’t stand it.
I have prided myself on being an open parent. I have prided myself on teaching both my son and girls the importance of empathy. The importance of humanity. That we are all of the same earth. That though we look different we are all unique and of value. Blah, blah, blah. And I have Cher from Clueless as my daughter. I don’t get it. What am I doing wrong?
As I listened to this conversation, aghast, I grabbed my cell phone. I cowered in my bathroom in my bedroom, otherwise known as the “safe place” and called my friend Cynthia to report that my daughter is one of those girls. In heated whisper so as not to be detected by infiltrators outside the locked bathroom door, I repeated the listened in on phone call. “She really said that! Can you believe that?” I whispered frantically to Cynthia. “I know I know right!” I was on the phone with Cynthia locked in my own bathroom for over an hour rehashing every detail of my daughter’s transgression. Believe me; the irony is not lost on me.
What is with us women? Why do we bond over trashing each other? Why can we not wait to share the first sordid detail of any bad news? As open as I am. As empathetic and humanitarian as I am, I am one of those girls. I’m not proud of this fact. I’m certainly not jumping for joy that I’ve created a monster in my own image.
But sad to say, I do have a lot of fun with my daughter. Walking the mall commenting on bad hair. Bad outfits. Bad manners. Reading magazines together. Commenting on the latest celeb gossip. Going to Starbucks for a chai tea, (she’s only 11, I’m not getting her hopped up on caffeine) and chattering about nothingness, fluff. I'm not saying it's right but I don't know that I'm saying it's wrong either. We parents are typecast as the heavy. We have to be, it’s part of the job. I can do heavy. I nag, complain, critique and criticize with the best of them. But isn’t it important to bond as well? Isn’t it good for our souls to dish? I wish we women could get the same sense of community and connectedness from hashing out world peace. But let’s face it, we don’t. Or most of us don’t. If you are one who does, I bow down to you.
Maybe the best we can hope for is to mix in some good with the not so good. After all, isn’t that the point? To accept each other and ourselves for what we are? The good, the bad and the ugly?
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