Over Eating @ MindSay

Went and renewed my membership at the gym today.  I neeeeeeeeed to get back into it again.  I have gained so much weight it is not funny.  It is hard being in this bad of shape.  I wouldn't have thought so but it is.  So I figure I will start by just riding the bike for a few weeks and move on from there.  I have good for you food in the house so I won't eat anything bad.  But I do have some wine left.  I figure I will finish that off this weekend and be done with it.

 

Last week I started eating better.  For snacks at work I have been eating vegetables.  For lunch I have been cooking it at home, bringing it to work so I won't have the temptation of eating fast food. 

 

Tomorrow after the Steelers game I plan on going to the grocery store for some fresh vegetables and some fruit juice.  I start each weekday morning with some pomegranate juice but I think I will add some apple juice to the mix!  I love apple juice.  Maybe some grapefruit juice also.

 

Monday morning is going to be here before I know it.  I wonder if I can download the theme from "Rocky"!

just wanted to wish all of you a happy thanksgiving! i hope its better than mine probably will be, what with all the self hate for making myself so fat once tomorrow comes. luckily its my mom's family, but no uncle gary. :(

what else can I say... I totally foraged on leftover treats from the book group, my stomach aches and  I feel degenerate but the bad stuff is gone and tomorrow I can eat rabbit food. I also managed to remove tiles from behind the cook top. demolition is  a great tension relief. this week end I patch and paint. anyone want to come over  and help?

 

oh no am I visually repating myself?

i tried to start a diet at the beginning of the week. it hasn't been working. not only can i not get myself to eat healthily, but I can't even get myself to not compulsively eat. One thing that people tell you to do when you go on a diet is to only eat when you are truly hungry. not when you're craving something, not when you feel like eating, but when you start to feel that incredible pain that many people face everyday and don't have a choice. of course, if you're only starting to feel it then it's not incredibly painful....just enough to hurt and make you say, "i need to eat", and like many (but not all) Americans, food is most likely available at that point. i can't stick to it, though. i mean, i usually eat a lot of fatty foods the week before and somewhat during my period, i know that, but i really need to gain control. i've been letting it slide and stopped caring, and I can't let that happen anymore. I wrote an entry a couple days ago that said just how much weight i've gained. this isn't healthy and i don't know what to do to gain control. like, i used to be able to punish myself by cutting, but i can't anymore, especially if i want to keep seeing Jimmy on a regular basis. He's not going to want to see or feel my stomach all cut up, which is exactly what would happen. Does anyone have any advice for me? i just want to be healthy.

Happy Mother's Day to all you Mom's out there.  I hope you had a lovely day dedicated to you.

We went down to see my mom this morning.  I was supposed to call JM while on the way, but my lack of concentration kind of got in the way, my dad called and distracted me, and I just suck as a daughter!  By the time I remembered I was supposed to call, it was late in the day here and I am sure she was in bed asleep by then.

My mom is on a pizza kick, so we picked up a couple of pizzas at an Italian place that I grew up with in my old neighborhood.  I LOVE their food!  Whenever you ask for mushrooms and peppers on a pizza from Dominoes or Pizza Hut, you get maybe 5 of each.  So, I asked for extra peppers and extra mushrooms.  I was NOT disappointed.  There were so many on there, you couldn't see the cheese!  Absolute heaven!

After noshing on pizza and visiting with my folks, Hubby wanted to go to his favorite gun store.  I really don't care much for the place, so I had him drop me off at the gym near my folk's house.  Since I totally skived off the past 2 days in regards to exercise, I figured I should make amends.  What a nice gym they have!!  Makes the one I usually go to look pretty weak.  I would imagine it still gets crowded during the week.  Even with all the open space and the 2nd floor full of cardio equip.  The 1st floor was all weights and the pool/spa.  Nice and cool and non-smelly.  I was quite pleased with the place.  I had thought to do a bunch of cardio, but then I figured I'll be doing cardio tomorrow night, so I should do weights today.  That and it let me try out the different types of equip they have. 

So, yes, I did exercise today.  But, I ate 3 pieces of pizza.  That can't be good.  Then my sweet tooth started gnawing on me and I got a Hostess cupcake (anglefood/orange) on the way home.  Naughty!  Then while I was ordering a body fat caliper I had a serious case of munchies that wouldn't go away.  I ate about a handfull of M&Ms to make the munchies leave me alone.  not a good diet day.  But I think I can blame it on PMS. 

Ah well, I'm tired.  Must sleep.  G'night.