Others @ MindSay

WHY should I think that talking to someone could make the problem better.

So ... I find myself this morning thinking about self-image. Where does it come from? Who defines us ... Who has helped to define me? A number of people have had a monumental influence on who I have become and who I continue to become.  :)

• Obviously my parents played a critical role both biologically and in the way they nurtured me.  Nature + Nurture! 

• One nerdy & humble man of God (first name, Jim) back in my sophomore year in high school, demonstrated that Jesus was bigger than church, bigger than Sunday morning, and alive & able to change lives still. He also let me feel around and find my own way to love Jesus.

• After college, I enlisted in the Army, and was shipped off to a few different places. I landed in Fairbanks, Alaska, certain I'd been set to the absolute end of the world. I was not too happy with God or my life at that point. Still ... God watched out for me, set me in a family there ... a family that loved Him. They became more than just friends ... they became mentors on many levels. (Another Jim & Barb - and 3 kids: Jerry, Lori, & Beth) They all taught me tons of stuff ... TONS! They showed me Family. Discipline. Communication. They became a life sized object lesson that heavily influenced my early notions of family.

• Then ... my Ex ... not a Jim! lol Sadly, he taught me a lot, too, but not usually good fun stuff. I found my marriage certainly didn't fit the mold ... or my dream. Still, I fought for it for nearly 20 years before I walked away, fearful that I would fall into the "mold" of the typical divorced woman. Another image I fought!

• My 3 kids entered this world loved. I've learned bunches from each of them, too, trying to discern their gifts and talents and steer them in their own individual path! I imagine I will continue to learn from them ... I tried to fit into the image I had of a perfect "mom," but ... I just didn't fit it! Then, for a time, I felt like a failure because I couldn't fit it ... sheesh!  So good to know that first, there is no such thing as a perfect mom or dad, and, secondly, since it doesn't exist, I don't have to fit it!  lol

• A company of delightful, fun, and amazing friends ... Someone told me one day when I wasn't thinking very well of myself, that if I line all my friends and family up in my imagination side by side, I will see a reflection of myself in them. Pretty good advice! This notion helped to re-adjust my thinking on a number of occasions.  Check it out!

 

I admit, however, that I'm the kind of person who is just arrogant enough to want to break through the expectations put on me by others.  I remember in 5th grade one day at recess ... (amazing what we remember, hmmm?) Anyway, it had snowed recently, and there was a large pile of snow beside the ball field. The other kids were playing kickball, but this one day, I didn't feel like playing kickball.  I felt like being by myself.  I wandered toward the pile and packed a snow ball, then pensively began to "carve" it with my mittened thumb. My teacher, Mrs. Hornbeck, slowly walked over and asked if I was OK. She interrupted my solitude and it irritated me.  I wanted to be alone. She was concerned for my well-being. Now, if it had been this way everyday, there might be cause for concern, but it wasn't everyday ... just once in a while. She coerced me into joining the kickball game. Fun ... but it wasn't what I wanted to do on that day. Point is ... she misjudged what I was doing and what I needed at the time by putting her expectations on me. 

 

How often do we "coerce" others into some image we have for them?

 

OK ... I digress ... There was a time when my parents were my identity. Then, my college was my chosen identity and I wore it like a badge of honor.  I joined the Army, rebelliously breaking from the path my parents and others may have set for me.  I was offered a commission, but declined it.  I wanted to be respected for my personal performance, not because of the insignia on my collar, so I didn't really fit the military images either.

 

Politics ... religion ... socio-economic ... education ... So many criteria we use to judge and categorize people.  Just like you, I am an individual with personal likes and dislikes, strong opinions, convictions, and beliefs. I've ALIVE ... imperfect ... flawed ... changing ... growing ... challenging ... seeking ... and I care for people ... for individuals. Just when you think you have me figured out ... BOOM!  I'll do or say something that doesn't seem to line up. Have I suddenly changed, or am I still me being me? What's my identity!

 

I tend to become defensive when I, or someone I care about, is "coerced" into something they may not want or believe.  With all the political JUNK going on these days, there is a lot of prejudice.  A few days ago, I wrote a piece about my stand about Iraq.  You may disagree with me, but it is inaccurate to toss me into the pile of "ignorant, uninformed, unthinking Americans" (or other such labels) just because my viewpoint differs from yours.  The same applies to personal, spiritual beliefs.  I happen to believe that Jesus is God incarnate, now residing, by means of the Holy Spirit, within humans who admit their need for Him ... but that doesn't mean I embrace every theological, behavioral, or hypocritical doctrine that you may ascribe to "Christians." 

 

Bottom line? None of us belong in a box. I try not to put my expectations on others or afix premature labels on others for my convenience. Please try to return the favor. This is ME ... feeling my way through this life, mistakes and all! OK? Thanks for your indulgence!  ;)

 

~ B

Hi there, so I've pretty much wasted my Saturday lol. I did one load of laundry and listened to this pretty cool band that I just found. Last night was pretty fun. I went bowling with some friends from work and I pretty much sucked it up but I still had a good time. Also, speaking of yesterday and work, I got peed on! Haha, it was so gross but it wasn't too too much so I just changed shirts and changed the little girl's diaper and that was that. So my friend was talking to me today about how she was feeling purpose-less and how she was feeling a little depressed. I don't really know what to tell her but I do feel badly for her. I think we're going to have a girls night tonight and hopefully that will cheer her up... Well anyways, I guess I'll go and try to do something productive.

I set and listen to the candidates that are struggling for the Democratic nomination and all I hear are empty platitudes about changing the country or leveling the playing field, attempting to institute socialism.

Socialism has been tried through history.  With a few, short lived successes it has been a miserable failure.  Even those places were the people wanted to be there the community eventually fails.  These communities were usually based on one or two personalities, when they died or left, the system could not continue.  You also will eventually have people leaving because they grow dissatisfied with how things are distributed.  A master craftsman gives up his superior work to the community and in return receives inferior goods.  Even the most dedicated of people will lose heart.

It is impossible to raise everyone up to the level of work that some are capable of, so you must bring them down to the level of the “average” person.  It is not proper to have some people better than others in a true socialistic society.  When you have the best and brightest being brought down for being better, the society will eventually lose its ability to continue existing.

There is nothing new that has been discovered in our age that makes this kind of society possible.  We are led to believe that the Democratic left has some secret formula that they are just waiting to implement the moment you vote them into the White House.  They do not have any real plans; all they have is wishful thinking and a faith that has nothing concrete to back it up.

You cannot have a utopian society.  It is impossible, the haves resent their work being taken and given to the have-nots and the have-nots are unappreciative of it because it was not their choice. 

 

 

Look at the housing projects that have been put up around the country.  Some were constructed reasonably well, some were badly designed and poorly constructed either way within a generation of their construction they had been damaged by the occupants and the civic authorities grew tired of constantly repairing them.  Eventually they degenerated to the point that the only thing left to do was tear them down, displacing large numbers of people and exacerbating an already bad situation.

Barak Obama and Hillary Clinton have nothing of substance to offer this country.  Their constant tinkering with socialism, hoping to stumble on a magic formula is nonsense.  It is irrational, to continue doing the same thing hoping for a different result.  This shows they have no real grasp of economics or people.

It is easy for them to make claims of changing society because they are isolated from the average person, surrounded by sycophants and special interest groups who are able to manipulate their time and exposure to differing opinions.  Step away from the photo opportunities and go out and talk to people on the other side of this and see how they feel having their hard work taken away to support a social engineering idea that has failed miserably these last twenty years.

I would like someone to explain to me how they will accomplish what no other country or organization has been unable to do since the advent of civilization.   How they will force people to live according to rules and ways of life these people do not believe in.  The Communists were unable to do this in Russia, they tried for over eighty years, they failed and they had absolute control over the people and society.

Regretfully they can’t tell you how.  They have no idea.

People need to be free to be.  The reality is that some will be poor and until they learn that education and hard work are the only way out of that poverty they will stay there.  If you believe that you are a victim of society then you will do nothing to help yourself and you will pass that on to the next generation to continue the cycle.

I Am A:
Daughter, Sister, Cousin, Niece, Wife, Mom, Aunt, Friend.....
Country girl through and through....
Quiet person until you get to know me.....
CHRISTIAN.....
I:
Love my immediate family which consists of my husband,son and daughter......
Love my extended family from my husband.....
Love my Mom,problems and all......
Love my brother........never thought we'd be so close!!!! .......
Have three very dear, special friends that I have had for a looonnnnggg time,
Almost 30 yrs- Peggy,Lisa And Carolyn.....
 Love CATS!!!..... Love animals period!..... Have fears.... Have Dreams.... Have love to give.... Like helping others....
Miss my kids being little and needing mommy!!! .........Miss Morgan- the laughter in my life.... Miss my little girl.....She looks so beautiful, always....
Miss my father-in-law.........
Miss my Dad,my confidant...................