2am... Homework not done... spent the past 4 hours playing NCAA football for xbox with my roomate... this is my life... this is college.
A lot has been going on in my life lately. I guess I haven't published in over a month, but I guess it's because I haven't really felt inspired to write anything. Heh... I'm a geek. Anyway, I've been thinking a lot about life in general the past couple of weeks. From my life, my friends' lives, people I don't know's lives. Do you ever sit and think about how everyone else is just like you. And what I mean by that is, everyone else has a life that you have, except it's their own. I know that probably doesn't make sense. But okay, sometimes I'll sit and think... hmmm, my roomate has had a life and he knows everything about and it's totally different than mine, but it's his, and each person I know is like that. There are 8 billion people in this world, and each one of them sleeps at night, has feelings, has their own relationships, has everything. It's a little overwhelming when you think about it for the first time.
Another thing I've been thinking about is that life is really what you make of it. I look back on high school sometimes with regret, because I always think there is more that I could've done, but I didn't even think about it at the time. Isn't that what we usually do? When we are caught up in the middle of something, we tend to lose the value of it until it's over. It's still bizarre to me that I won't ever be a high school student again. High schoolers now will always be younger than me. And now before I know it, I'll be graduated from college and the same thing will happen. I guess I feel like I haven't lived enough. I really want to grasp all that life has to offer. I want to surround myself with people who feel the same way too.
So back to my school issue. I've been dealing a lot with ORU's frustrations as of late. It's not the school itself I'm frustrated with, it's the program. They have what is called a Drama/Television/Film program which basically is like a double major in drama and media. However, I want to perform in the theater, maybe even musical theater, and ORU doesn't offer any dance. None. So... yeah... regardless of how much I like this school... I can't stay. I can't. And that's sad... because as annoying this place is, there is something in my heart that loves it, and I can't really put my finger on it or explain it to anyone, no matter how hard I try. Even after I transfer, I know I'll miss it. I know I will... that's why this is so difficult.
Well I need to stop philosophizing about my life and get to bed.
"Our wits is what makes us men."
-Braveheart
Eric
