Not Interested @ MindSay

I'm not sure if i blogged about this before but a while back i was gonna ask this girl in my photography class out. However after deciding to ask her out we were talking as a group about relationships and she said she wasn't really interested in a relationship so i decided not to ask her out.

 

However yesterday she said that she believes that the guy should always make the first move. This made think whether sh had changed her mind and is now interested in a relationship. SHould i ask her out or not?

 

Anyone got any advice?

 

Anyway,

 

"Tell me what the fuck is wrong with me"

Maybe me randomly sending this guy my number sparked something in him to make him want to take a chance with me.  I feel like going into exactly what all happened yesterday, but I'm kinda confused on if he is willing to take a chance or just wants to hang out.  I wouldn't go this into it on this blog, but I haven't been able to talk to anyone who would know what is going on, so I just need to get it all out of my head.

 

As seen in my last blog, I randomly sent my number to a guy of my liking, not really sure why, I just did.  I'm thinking he noticed.  Sunday at church it stared with him sitting next to me during our bible study class.  I know that's not really a big deal and he's done it the past several sundays that I've been there and I think that everyone feels kinda good when their crush sits next to them. Now I was kinda expecting him to go off on his own like he usually does after class, but that morining he didn't.  He hung around while me and another girl who I'm staying with talked about last night and how hot it got in their apartment.  Then while we migrated to the auditorium for worship he stayed pretty close and sat next to me during service as well, and I think that was out of the ordanary because he usually sits on the other side of the room during sevice.  We did seperate after sevice for like 5 minutes, but as soon as we could get togther again we pretty much did.  He was next to me before we got in line for our church dinner and was there until some people cut in line in front of him, lol.  But again he sat next to me while we ate. 

 

Slowly people began to get up and socialize down in the entrey way while people were starting to leave.  Pretty soon we were the only ones left in the building (I found it funny when his parents left and his mom mumbled something about coming over and watching tv or something, don't know why but it was funny and made me chuckle)  Maybe he was just trying to be nice and keep me company for an hour and a half that I had to kill before I headed off to work.  But we talked about so much stuff just standing there for that long.  One of the things that came up was the new movie "Superman Returns".  I know that he is a big fan of Superman and I've been trying to hint that I would like to see the movie as well through e-mails.  Although threw the e-mails I started noticing that I was kinda blocking my chance of that by saying that I would rather see the first two Superman movies before seeing the new one, so that I would have some idea of what the story was.  Well, to my suprise while we were getting ready to leave he invited me over to his house to watch the two movies this tuesday.  I was all excited that he asked me over and it was on my mind pretty much the whole time I was at work.

 

Now, after evening church service kinda had me mixed up.  It started off good, I was sitting in the back since I came in late and I was talking to some of the girls who were sitting in front of me.  My guy came from the front of the room all the way to the back and again stood right next to me while the church group socialized.  Afterwards, the group went to eat at McD's.  I probably should have found a better place to sit with more chances to give him to sit near me again ;-).  But I didn't I only left one space, but he wass right be hind me in line so I figured he would get it.  Nope someone got their food before he did and took his spot.  So he sat next some of the other girls of the group.  I've been told that this one girl in particular just likes to flirt, but that my guy doesn't have any likeing for her.  But I just thought that he seemed to flirt back all night.  So it just got me thinking, do I have a chance?  Is he even remotely intrested?  And what makes it worse is when he says he is going to go someplace or do something and then doesn't show up, I feel really foolish.  I know it was just a trip to wal*mart, but if you say your going to go you should go.  I guess I knew better when I left McD's and he stood around with those who were left.(mainly the girl who likes to flirt with him.)

 

I guesss he just confuses me sometimes.  I am really looking forward to going over and watching the movies with him.  I'm not sure if this is just fun and hanging out stuff.  Or a date of some sort, I don't know, I'm bad with relationships.  So even though I'm going to be nervous driving over to his house I'm going to do my best to just have fun hanging out and not worrying about weither or not I'm getting myself into a new relationship.  He's a cool guy and I like talking and hanging around him, so why make it more complicated than that.  It's all very confusing in my head, but see talking about it made me feel better, thanks for listening, and feedback would be greatly appreciated.

has anyone ever seen a sheep dance? lol if not heres ur chance!! :D



hehe aint it cute? :P

lol okay time to update this thing.. hmm..

i was pretty mad at my cousin heather coz i found out that she had said MY NAME on some kids profile thing when she left him a comment.. but the worst part was she flat out lied to me about doing it she said she didnt she said she PROMISED she didnt do that but i knew she really had i had seen it and so i went back to the page copied it and was like oh really so then who wrote this?? and showed her exactly what she had said.. and she still was sayin she didnt an then shes like "i didnt understand" umm okay what was so confusing about "why did u say my name on some kids page?" o.O yeah thas what i thought.. but whateva.. im over it.. not like it can be taken offa there but GRRR i just dont get it i would never do something like that to someone. if i wanted them to know my name i would put it on my page. or i would tell them myself. i mean freakin a dude i dont even talk to anyone on that site other than comments back an forth on the threads.. and boomboom but bleh to that.. and that TX boi.. blah to him too.. everyone seems to be annoying.. and boring.. like i care if u like something about me.. good for u.. is that the whole point of talking to me? to like things about me? i thought u added people and messaged people to get to know them and to have conversations with them not go on and on.. after whas it been 3 days? this is basically all hes had to say

- i just want you to know that im your friend for life "hugs"
- thanks for helping out youre the coolest friend :)
- lol but more importantly youre nice and i like that about you :)
- lol lets just say i love you as a friend :)

hm okie ima copy it straight from da inbox thing.. heres a part of the msg convo from the very first day..

HIM: thanks i like ya and its not cause of your looks like some guys think about,for me its cause youre a nice friendly person
ME: lol "i entertain wit more than jus my looks" say that lol jk i like ya too.. but dont get any ideas coz i got a bf and unlike most girls i know i got respect for him
HIM: nah im not getting any ideas,lol i just wanted you to know that i think youre nice and that someone sees something diffrent in you other than looks

............

heh and this is from the msg today.. well yesterday..

HIM: lol that is definatley true
I think i really do love you as a friend,lol
ME: lol okie okie i get it geezzz haha can u draw??
HIM: lol you make me laugh too
ME: lol i do? nifty
HIM: you sure do and i like that about you
ME: thas coo..
HIM: yeah,i must say that ever since we met ive smiled more and more
ME: awww welp i like makin ppl happy
HIM: same here its so amazing how much we have in common
ME: haha what do we have in common besides likin to make ppl happy?
HIM: lol well we both like baseball,and we both seem to want the same things from relationships,lol
ME: lol we both like baseball but u like to watch it on tv i like to play.. and im already in a relationship so that part dun even matta

.............

im sorry but i dont care if u like something about me. IM NOT INTERESTED IN YOU!!! o_o;; am i wrong to be so mad about that? o.O

oh an also i talked to heather's "bf" today lol well barely but it was funny im like "im not a stalker i promise" haha an asked him if he was really a skater boi an he thought it seemed obvious lool then heather omg before she left tonight shes like "i have to go. bye and dont talk to my boyfriend." like wtf why would i want to talk to ur bf??? hes not even much of a bf if u ask me.. if i hadnt talked to someone since april.. and i emailed him like everyday and he didnt email me back.. even tho he obvi was online.. yeah how fugged up is that?? and besides that shes lookin up all these goth guys on this VP site or w/e tellin me today shes printin their pics off an puttin them on her door.. wtf? o_o an then the other day shes talkin bout goth guys askin if i like goth guys i said "i like my bf :)" an shes like oh come on u they look so good blah blah blah" like hello? um i dont pay attention to other guys why would i? im not interested in any other guy.. and goth guys? okay so they wear black. they like black. they look good in black. i like the style but im not really into that anymore =S and she says "im trying to be a goth and a punk when i want to be" o.O i dont get it.. but i guess thas her.. not gonna judge her for that.. but when she gets caught up wit da wrong crowd.. *sighs* an esp givin out info on the net.. she has no clue who she could really be talking to an thas the worst part.. u never know who ur really telling all that PERSONAL shyt to..

but aight neva mind that for now well then i got off yahoo coz i didnt feel like talkin to him anymore. or to anyone on there. will's the only reason i was on yahoo.. to see how he was doin wit this whole angela thing.. so ya.. but like i said i got off yahoo and wasnt really talking to anyone else.. if someone msgd me i jus ignored it.. i knew it wasnt tommy or techno or tai so it didnt matter.. i was making vms tryna make something good for ymmot when he comes back but i was listening to them over and ewww lol i didnt like em so i deleted em :D haha but im gonna make a new one soon.. MAYBE.. jus gotta find a good song to do that i dont sound stupid doing lol

gah.. i actualy logged some hours for PE today.. only two but at least it was something.. two hours a day rest of the week and ill have more than my needed 10.. so yay.. i was gonna do my art assignment but O_O i cannot imitate that drawing whatsoever and it looks easy but when i try its like EWWW

lmao the other day i came up with this

"twinkle twinkle im a little star
dont you know how amazing you are
running around the sky thas so blue
coz im an angel and so are you"

hehe yeah its lame but oh wellz *dedicates it to tommy* :D

la de da dum de dum dum hmmm im thinkin bout him now.. i couldnt stop thinkin bout him all day.. well i neva really can.. but yesteray wow O_O i wonder if he thinks about me the way i do him.. and if he feels the way he does about me as i do him.. *sighs* uh oh.. i think now im scurred =( tommyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ='(

omg omg i jus remembered my dream from last night well this mornin.. yesterday mornin.. whateva u wanna consider it lol it was fuggin crazy lmao fez from that 70s show.. and jackie from that 70s show.. they were in it.. it was in my school in my town lmao and um well i dont really remember what was going on but i remember walking in front of the elementary in the town i grew up in an walkin beside fez an it was dat feeling u get when u have a crush on someone and ur all shy an flustered around em an u dun want em to know ur crushin on em kind of thing looool i woke up thinkin omg i got a crush on fez hahaha O_O but its not true i dont really have a crush on him but that dream was funny.. xD

lmao aight its 4:30am.. im dead tired.. im gonna go to bed..

TOMMY I MISS AN LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH BABYYY mwahhh *snuggles wit ya* i wish =( hope ur feelin better soon..

gnite beeyotches haha jk byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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