Narcissist @ MindSay 
Mom is trying to cope the best she can. It's been really hard on her. Without going into too much detail, I think a lot of her problem is that she never had an identity outside of being with my dad. She didn't have the carefree single life my friends or my sister and I had. She got married her sophomore year in college and she got pregnant with me in April of her senior year. She's now faced with just being herself. Who is she? What are her personal hopes and dreams? How does one even date these days? It is rough seeing her this way.
My dad is going through a crazy mid-life crisis. The man pierced both of his ears for crying out loud! He's pretty damaged. He is a narcissist -- a textbook case. I'm not saying that as pissed off daughter -- on the contrary, this whole experience has left me numb and downright clinical in some cases. He's a narcissist down to fact that nothing is ever his fault and he hasn't done anything wrong. He doesn't even acknowledge that he was wrong for having an affair. He just focuses on how hard my mother was to deal with after she found out he was cheating on her. In his mind, I guess he expected for her not to act like a woman scorned and have trust issues. Like I said -- narcissist.
My sister is dealing with the whole thing by throwing herself into planning for her wedding. She's been driving us all nuts, but to be fair, who wouldn't want this day to be perfect after all the crap we've been seeing lately?
My baby brother has become the world's most angst-ridden rapper. His lyrics have been so dark and sorrowful lately. I have to hand it to him though, his lyrics haven't been full of curse words and hardly any of his newer songs have vulgarity in them. Unlike my blogs which I've noticed have been rife with curse words!
The kiddo is coping, but she still gets sad about it, especially when she goes to my mom's house (formally my parents' house) and sees the evidence of my dad's moving out. She feels so sad for my mom. She shakes her head and says she doesn't understand why they won't get back together. Now every time her dad and I argue or even discuss something loudly, she is afraid we are going to get a divorce.
I've been a mess. It's hard when you realize that your parents are nuttier than squirrel shit. I am still dealing with what I feel is the absurdity of being 35 years old and being affected by my parents' divorce. I feel like I should be dealing with things better, but it is tough hearing the anger and the sadness coming from my mom's end and hearing denial and seeing evidence of clear, definite neurosis on the other end. Good God! Plus the fact, I hate having to call my dad and make an appointment to come by so I can avoid running into his girlfriend. I really, REALLY want to avoid knocking the wig off that trick!
I have very little patience for discord lately which is why I have been more silent than usual on Mindsay. I'd rather not get into a debate with anyone because I don't want to lose my normally cool head and end up name calling -- that's just not my style. (Yes, believe it or not I rarely get angry during those heated debates even though people insist that I am.) I definitely don't have time to deal with people who like to argue just for the sake of arguing and because the day happens to be a day that ends in "Y". Anyway, I'm lucky I have a good kid and husband who knows how to apologize when he's wrong and knows how to deal with my...um...intense personality.
(CLICKABLE LINKS ARE EMBEDDED HERE - SCROLL OVER & CLICK)
In June 2007, our friends at EOPC re-ran the story of "J"/GRIDNEY - (please go read because this online predator's a piece of work aside from being a great education on how they ALL work.)
A year ago EOPC told us one of this online predator's victims was STILL being victimized by him (he called it "a falling out" ha ha ha) yet again and she wrote a blog with all the information on it called THE STUMBLING BLOCK. Its well worth a read because you can really see her devastation and emotional turmoil. Every victim could relate to her honesty!
Now readers -- compare this to the childish, rageful actions of someone you have told the truth about. Let's break it down; see how it compares.
1. "YOU STARTED IT!"... Even if You Didn't
"J"/GRIDNEY/ Yidwithlid wants this victim to control the internet and take down all posts about him - she tried. EOPC said no, we said no. Mostly because this victim (there was more than one) was not the INITIATOR of the exposes! But he's going to continue to give her a public beat down because beating up on defenseless people makes him feel like a big man.
She reports that she begged an MSN support site to remove her posts (the MSN Site REFUSED) about him when that site owner (femfree@yahoo.com) told her HE WAS SURFING HER NICKNAME AND COMING THERE TO READ EVERYTHING SHE WROTE!
Yet he's mad? Incredible!
yidwithlid also committed copyright infringment against our old sites and EOPC. We had written to Blogger.com about it - so in response, this bully saids he's making a bunch of new hate sites about his victim. To RETALIATE FOR THE TRUTH BEING OUT THERE!
Why? Because he thinks: She is us. EOPC told us he thinks she is them too!
He's scared of her because she's that OMNIPOTENT? This is so funny because this victim does nothing for either us or EOPC. Nor was she the person who initiated his exposures.
But of course, anyone who exposes the almighty YIDWITHLID must be only her, right? (they all think they're almighty, don't they? Like Ed Hicks who tells everyone the wives he committed bigamy & fraud on set HIM up... LOL!)
This even after she asked everyone to stop bothering him. Unfortunately - can't control everyone now, can you?
Gridney/ Yidwithlid is also furious that we Linked to his website!
Well, if he truly believes he's done nothing wrong & that HE is the victim - he should be glad for the free publicity!
CHECK OUT WHAT GRIDNEY/ Yidwithlid says to what apparently is one of his victim's friends on his hate blog about his victim:
Are you telling me that Elizabeth posted my picture on the internet including MSN newsgroups as NYC******.
Barbara signed the letter to the Rabbi At aish?
GRIDNEY/ YidwithLid TRULY IS CRAZY!
We have copies of what is on his victim's site:
the person at AISH he is talking about? The victim named ELIZABETH?
- She initially wrote this Rabbi at AISH
- GAVE the Rabbi this Barbara's email
- Barbara RESPONDED to the Rabbi's inquiry email about him.
Not initiated. RESPONDED.
GRIDNEY/ YIDWITHLID, like all cyberpaths - sees only what makes him look like the victim.
So Mr. GRIDNEY/ YIDWITHLID - Tell us - what were your victims supposed to do?: LIE & COVER MORE FOR YOU? ACT LIKE IT DIDN'T AFTER YOU DESTROYED TWO WOMEN? ACT AS COLD & UNCARING ABOUT WHAT YOU'D DONE TO THEM AS YOU?
Remember readers: To a cyberpath you are nothing but a hologram or an object, not a real person and certainly not entitled to feelings! You're there only to make them feel good. Like the porn babes so many of them are addicted to, their victims are supposed to GO AWAY with just a click. Cyberpaths look at you as a FREEBIE. They believe they owe you NOTHING. But you aren't nothing - you are SOMEONE!
(Reminder, that MSN group was a VICTIMS SUPPORT GROUP - so YIDWITHLID's just admitted HE'S a stalker!.
And that particular MSN support group? His picture is there - BUT HIS NAME IS NOT! So unless he has even MORE victims who might recognize him (he probably does) - he's angry over NOTHING!)
None of his targets EVER used that nickname he rants about on MSN. MSN however, knows he was SURFING and stalking his victims from board to board! Monitoring their every word and emotional pain. What a GREAT GUY!! (click here for more)
Try to keep this straight: This predator admits surfing a SUPPORT group. For one of his victims. When she was out of her mind with emotional pain, fear and trauma because of WHAT HE DID TO HER & other women (including his wife)?
And then:
HE's the angry one who wants his victims to JUST FORGET IT so he can lie, never apologize, smear them and continue duping his family & friends?
UNREAL
2. The Predator's Boundless Sense of Entitlement
How CRUEL can one Yid be? And he just wants his victims to FORGET about the trauma like it never happened? They are 'nutjobs' for having feelings and not being complicit with his untruthful version of things?
BALLSY, aren't these jerks!
GRIDNEY/ YIDWITHLID victimizes one innocent woman, slanders her, lies to her and when she figures his scheme out & that he's been using & abusing her for 2 years (the abuse sent her to the hospital more than once!!) -- he: GOES TO ONLINE SUPPORT GROUPS, FINDS & READS EVERYTHING THIS POOR TRAUMATIZED VICTIM IS VENTING ABOUT (WHAT HE PURPOSELY DID TO HER & HER FAMILY) AND LOOKING FOR SUPPORT ABOUT!
Be warned -- is yours doing this to YOU?
As a victim: you are 'out of your mind' looking for help and they are cyberstalking you reading EVERY WORD YOU ARE SAYING?
Gridney/Yidwithlid went so far as to post on one site (it was since removed because of the slanderous nature of the whole post by the site owners; who confirmed as much to The Exposer) :
"she tried to get me listen. No way bitch!"
So, Gridney/ Yidwithlid has proved he's a nasty bully. He doesn't even want to hear that Target #1 tried to do what he wanted. This liar had said prior to that, that he "didn't have time for hate." Now he's confirmed he's not just a bully - he's a pathological liar. He certainly made time for hate, when his Target #1 made time to attempt to make peace. (says alot about these cyberpaths, don't it?)
Gridney/ YidwithLid has gone so far as to accuse his target of being a PREDATOR (can you say PROJECTION?) and says she purposely put him on a porn aggregator (uh... Gridney/ Yid? Those are AUTOMATIC AGGREGATORS that troll the net for specific words... NO one PUTS you on one of those! You can't even JOIN one) Guess ole' Gridney/ Yidwithlid does an awful lot of ego surfing, huh?
GRIDNEY /YidwithLid even says the relationship was "her fault too" and she "played his game" with him. He neglects to mention that this victim genuinely cared for him while he LIED to her & had a hidden , destructive and malicious agenda towards her. (Don't they all?)
Is this starting to remind anyone of elementary school?
5. "I am the Victim Here"
His victim's site has a post which GRIDNEY/ Yidwithlid put on his own blog which whitewashes what he did. He never talks about his addiction to hookers, porn, phone sex, cybersex babes, etc. And twists what happened to make his victims look bad. "Mr. Innocent" paints himself as the victim. (playing victim is part of the profile of a sociopathic person)
6. Half-Baked Accountability
This narcissist even created a new profile on TECHNORATI (click here) to keep the hits to his hate site comin'!!! He removed his post of twisted reality from his blog and went right back to business as usual. Did we forget to mention he has NEVER taken down the hate site. hmmm.....
Like all emotional predators/ cheaters & womanizers - he targets the most vulnerable person for everything - even when she has clear, hard evidence what she did and didn't do.
Don't make a cyberpath THINK about what they've done!! Goodness no! They are beyond reproach.
No "I'm Sorry", no attempt to speak to his victims (got PLENTY of lame excuses not to) - just rage. He tells his victims to MOVE ON or GET OVER IT because he has. (of course he has -- LOL, why apologize for destroying someone's life) (classic pathological trait - no empathy or remorse for anyone but himself and the people he needs [family] to keep up the facade)
By the way, "moved on" is predator paramoralizing for "shut up about the truth so I can go back to banging whores and picking up vulnerable women online."
Let's look at Gridney/ YidwithLid's version of "moving on" - here's a message we would guess is for his victim.
Like many exposed cyberpaths - Gridney/Yidwithlid says we are "hurting his wonderful wife." No one was comparing his wife to his victims - EXCEPT HIM! His victims are good people. His wife is probably a good person. Only predators make those comparisons to attempt to further tear down the credibility of the victims!
He also says he and his wife have "WORKED IT OUT". Wouldn't you just LOVE to hear the bullcrap he told his wife about these normal, vulnerable women HE preyed on and sent to the hospital?? Not the prostitutes - the NORMAL ones. (probably the same bull he was saying about his wife to these women... since he follows the classic predator pattern)
7. Copyright Infringement (Playing Stupid, but...)
YID asserts because he was part of the chats published on EOPC that he owns the copyright. He did own part of the copyright to the chat only - but not our or EOPC's comments or commentary on the chats (which are wall to wall lies & manipulation on his part).
Cyberpaths HATE when you have verifiable evidence on them! (And often they give you that evidence THEMSELVES because they believe they will never get caught! -- WRONG)
He can't revoke the copyright either because it was published a couple years ago originally by EOPC and they extended their copyright to us - and the permission of only one of the chatters or emailers is necessary - and EOPC got that.
In fact: The Exposer did a little checking and back in March 2007, Sammy (yidwithlid's pseudonym) posted this on someone else's blog (along with some other thin-skinned sarcasm):
Posted by: Sammy Benoit | Mar 16, 2007 5:01:07 AM
A copyright may be embedded into a bitmap or jpeg file with software on a Mac or PC. Also, there are several companies that can officially help copyright images so that it is documented.
If these two things are done, and a quiet agreement is made with whomever uses it, it should be pretty easy to please everyone, and misuse of it would be easy to spot and stop. Well, hopefully.
So he does know about copyrights! Well, well, well.
We filed on him with IC3.gov and ChillingEffects.org.
What did we get for filing? Nastiness - and childish emails like these:
To: cyberpaths@gmail.com
Date: Sun, 24 Jun 2007 16:33:58 EDT
Subject: Re: http://stumblingtchatzkahs.blogspot.com http://stumblingtchatzkahs.blogspot.com/2007/06/XXX-XXX-makes-threat.html __________________
From: Yidwithlid@aol.com
To: exposer@37.com
Received-On: 06/26/07 5:54 PM
Subject: Re: Remove Content Please
NO
______________
From Yidwithlid@aol.com by mo-m22.mx.aol.com for exposer@37.com Tue, 26 Jun 2007 20:54:21 -0400 (EDT) Yidwithlid@aol.com X-Eon-Dm: dm08 Date: 06/26/07 1:54 PM
From: Yidwithlid@aol.com
To: exposer@37.com
Received-On: 06/26/07 5:54 PM
Re: Remove Content Please
No
But thanks for asking
____________________
From: Yidwithlid@aol.com
To: exposer@37.com
Cc: support@blogger.com
Received-On: 06/28/07 3:47 PM
Re: http://stumblingtchatzkahs.blogspot.com
cool two emails from you today thank you so much.. If you are publishing stuff that I wrote..then who gave you the copywite...I didnt. and I didnt write them say so take off all references to me and I will take down my site
By the way Are you enjoying the Nut job convention [victim's name]?
Tonight I am going to open up three new stumling tchatches sites.
***************
These immature emails bring to mind this quote:
Innocence seldom utters outraged shrieks. Guilt does.
~ Whittaker Chambers
8. This is MY Club, You Aren't Allowed
This cyberbully who is such an innocent victim? Pay attention to the infantile baloney a predator like him can pull:
Gridney/ Yidwithlid says he supposedly has VERY LITTLE POWER over a blogging aggregator to which both he & his Target 1 belong. (He says she's "following him"... LOL)
We read on her blog she was hacked May 2007. She won't tell us who did it - but we think we know. Gridney/ Yidwithlid says he has no idea what is going on & is outraged he and his cyber posse are even suspected! This victim of his? Never said his name or that she suspected him. Sounds like GUILT, Yid!
And... hmmm, he should be more careful what he HIMSELF puts on the net. The Exposer actually checks!!
GRIDNEY/ YidwithLid's got lots of blogs out there. Sounds like self-admitted narcissist Sam Vaknin. Can't get enough of themselves so they fill up the net with their rhetoric. Also creates a wider net for them to lure more innocents in to their web.
This one's from yidwithlid.typepad.com January 2007:
"January 21, 2007
New Peoples Choice Category: Most abusive of system
From two different sides of the world we wondered ....Who was crapping on our posts and yours. We had our lists of suspects but couldn't prove who was giving the bad grades ten at a time ...and how they were working sooooooo fast. Still have no clear proof. We do have some suspects . We googled the posts of one and noticed that there was one who would put up 8-9 posts one day, get them up over a hundred points take them down and repost the same articles the next day.
Then Sherlock Bagel Blogger found the a gun that was smoking even more. He put it in a much nicer way than me:
The awards known as the People's Choice awards seem to be finishing a lot quicker than most people expected.
I was going to hold on to this information until the results of the People's Choice Awards' became known, but I feel that it is not being honest to not divulge what I know.
I've debated with my self, my family and friends, should I or shouldn't I?
I also don't want to be accused of 'bitter lemons'.
I wrote a letter to another blogger and in the course of the letter I presented/made a table, now that I have made the table I feel something is seriously amiss.
I wont say what it is.
I'll leave the plain facts speak for them selves.
I have a PDF of the Google cache of 17th of Jan of the Israel forum's blog_best [rankings] which is now no longer available. [I have a copy and a html back up]
and I have a PDF of the 19 th Jan 2007 Israel forum's blog_best
Thats less than two days apart
What's the main difference? Well check it out you should be able to see it, it occurred over less than two days.
The person is relying on no one seeing anything or saying anything. Well I won't say anything if you don't.
Well here it is in Table form:
Rank 19th Jan Blog Name Votes tally on 17th Jan Rank on 17th Jan Votes tally 19th Jan
Date last activity
Tally count difference
Up or DownPlaces
1 The Last Best Place 5224 1 5503 18th 279 0
2 Freedom's Cost 3676 2 3734 16th 58 0
3 Yid With Lid 5916 3 6066 18th 150 0
4 Samson Blinded 2359 8 3579 18th 1220 +4
5 Daf Notes 3993 4 4199 18th 206 -1
6 Bagel Blogger 4737 5 4949 19th 212 -1
7 The Maggid of Bergenfield 1092 6 1113 16th 21 -1
8 Simply Jews 6818 7 6978 18th 160 -1
9 Baleboosteh 2367 9 2422 18th 55 0
10 JoeSettler 2253 11 2255 17th 2 +1
11 Sarah's View 4317 10 4366 18th 49 -1
12 The Way I See It 3250 12 3279 16th 29 0
13 Divrei Chaim 1385 13 1404 18th 19 0
14 Orthomom 3016 17 3102 18th 86 +3
15 Chayyei Sarah 1592 15 1592 14th 0 0
16 Ask Shifra 1600 16 1616 14th 16 0
17 The Muqata 2078 14 2140 18th 62 -3
18 Slightly Mad 1425 18 1425 14th 0 0
19 Israellycool 4319 19 4440 19th 121 0
20 Lazer Beams 2230 20 2315 18th 85 0
_________________________
Here are snapshots of sections of the webpages in question:"
He took 'snapshots'?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seems he and this BagelBlogger are into watching who comes and goes from this 'supposedly' unbiased aggregator and 'totally fair' blog voting. CLICK HERE TO LOOK WHO'S AT THE TOPS ON THE AGGREGATOR!!
If you click the link to the aggregator? Yid has MORE VOTES THAN ANYONE ELSE - almost DOUBLE! And the top blogger list has numerous bloggers who haven't posted in weeks according to the dates.
Yid and Bagel Blogger are CAREFUL not to make themselves #1 and #2 - there's some rigging going on? - this aggregator apparently a fixed race for FRIENDS or ASSOCIATES OF THESE TWO AND THEIR COHORTS? Looks like they DO have some 'power' and control over this aggregator.
So Target #1? You don't need to tell us who hacked you - we know.
Gridney/ Yidwithlid also takes out his frustrations when he is hacked with more cybersilliness: HERE
9. Rules Don't Apply to ME!
Here's a quote from GRIDNEY (YidwithLid's) on 8/14/07 - on his website:
I love the web's freedom. But with freedom comes responsibility. Certainly those who use the internet to harass or terrorize are abusing the freedom the internet brings.
Let us guess - if someone is exposing YID for the predator, bully and liar he is - they're a terrorizer.
Sure he loves the web's freedom - to prey on trusting women and dispose of them when they become inconvenient with no remorse! (sounds like all of them! blame-shifting and paramoralizing)
But when HE is called out on his predatory & manipulative actions towards the vulnerable women he targets; women who actually CARE about him - he's a victim.
And if you want to prey on, lie to and manipulate vulnerable women and use them as sex toys to be tossed away when you're done - to YidwithLid - That's FREEDOM!
The Exposer knows - FREEDOM isn't FREE. And where's your responsibility, YidwithLid? For what you did to innocent people?
Did we mention cyberpaths are hypocrites?
10. Terrorizing, Domination & Control
Cyberpaths, Predators and all Pathologicals are like most abusers - its about Control. Particularly the control of the flow of information and truth. Let's take a peak at how this cyberpath does some of it:
GRIDNEY (aka YidWithLid) has his blogs set so:
1. you HAVE to have a Blogger account to comment;
2. no anonymous comments. He "says" its for the integrity of his blogs! B.S. He wants to be able to track & smear anyone who calls him on his lies - just like a predator - always protecting their "image." CAN WE SAY HYPOCRITE!
Hold on! Gridney/ YidwithLid doesn't use his real name! So that makes HIS comments anonymous. Smells like a double standard there SAMMY!
Cyberpaths love to check the web for any evidence of their misdoings and try to erase it. NOTHING ever really disappears on the web. Nothing. If someone knows how to get into cache files - the internet is a FOREVER thing.
(Gridney/ Yidwithlid likes to log into the Exposer from an IP in Nashville, TN - wonder if his employer knows he does that?) as well as foreign IPs like Germany, Norway and so on.
12. The Use of 'Helpers' to Do Their Dirty Work
Also, Gridney/ Yidwithlid has made contact with an ex-client of his Target #1 (Target #1 is now a DV counselor). This woman - named "Judy" - has a lot of transferred anger against Target #1 because of her recommendationd "Judy" get professional counseling. And from 'Judy's actions below - she seems to really need it!
(gridney/ YidwithLid as "Moses"
can you say GRANDIOSE?)
Here's the slander "Judy" posted around the net after talking to Gridney/Yidwithlid about this poor victim (tell us, did your predator, ex and their buddies say similar crap about you when you told the truth? - they all seem to pull from the same 'slander pool')
Cyberpaths love to get others to either do or help the do their dirty work:
"BARBARA XXXX is sooo pissed off at the world that she has to bad mouth people. This phone sex whore has never meet me. She has never talked to me. I have NO idea why this BITCH hates me. We live across the country from each other. She is BI-POLAR and forgets to take her meds. (Barbara is not Bi-Polar or on any psychiatric meds)Cyberpaths love to use proxies (helpers)! (both the human & internet kind) Don't worry - its been reported to law enforcement by us, too!
She's very fat and very over weight. (Neglects to mention the fact Barbara's weight is due to chronic physical disability and that she has had multiple surgeries) In fact, BITCH BARBARA is a diabetic (No, she's not diabetic as far as we know) and doesn't take her metformin. (huh?)
She is into phone sex. She was giving phone sex to [Gridney/ Yidwithlid] until he tired of her. (she did? well -- at least Yid kinda 'admitted' to 'Judy' he used Barbara until he got bored) She begged him to give her another chance. When he wouldn't she posted his name all over the internet. (Barbara never begged him to give her another chance nor was she the one who posted his exposes anywhere! EOPC contacted HER not the other way around! LOL) Even called the cops on him. (Reported his verified death threats against her) Unreal! BITCH, what part of "He's just not in to you" don't you get? During all of this phone sex, her husband is in the next room. (and 'Judy' knows this how? when she started by saying she doesn't even know this Barbara... LOL) Unbelievable! I've heard that he has moved upstairs to get away from the BITCH WHO LOVES PHONE SEX BECAUSE NO MAN ON EARTH WANTS TO HAVE REAL SEX WITH THIS UGLY BITCH. (Barbara is divorced now, and she initiated the divorce. Her husband didn't want to divorce her. As for her sex life, again - how would 'Judy' or Gridney/ Yidwithlid know this??) It's the only sex she will ever get. EVER. She says she can't work because she's to fat to move. (Again, no mention of her severe physical disability - which has nothing to do with being um... fat)
So if your into phone sex, go ahead, give the bitch a call. (845)687-7706. If your in the neighborhood, go see how ugly she is: 372 Scarawan Road, Stone Ridge, New York. Or drop her a sickning card: 2 2 RR 2 Box 115 Accord, New York, 12402. E-mail this phone sex addict at: pedsilva@gawab.com or at BDC@yahoo.com Silva is her maiden name. (we only published all this information above because it's not only all incorrect, it was never valid... so where 'Judy' got this from who knows! wait she says where she got it from below... NOT!!)
She has harrassed me to the point of threatening my life along with my sons. I had to give her name to the FBI. They in return gave me her full name. (LOL - wow then the FBI got it wrong. Besides, the FBI would never ever give out personal information like that. Wonder if they know what Judy's saying about them? And 'Judy's' children are adults - how can they all be threatened?) This bitch has called me to harrass me at home. I had to change my number. (Barbara has never called 'Judy' and we are aware that a search of her phone records over the past 4 years would show this. A complete lie by one of Gridney/ Yidwithlid's new terrorizing assistant!!) Remember, she doesn't even know me. I have no idea whats up her ass. Probably her dildo got stuck and pissed her off cuz she can't get it out! I'd sure like to put her picture up her. Her birthdate is Aug. 9, 63 but if you saw her you'd swear she was born in 43! She has the most ugliest hairdo from the 60's that I've ever seen. (Again, completely fallacious information) I hope to God she gets back on her meds. (you do? below 'Judy' hopes she has a heart attack. hmmm) A total fucking fool! She needs to learn to let go! Yes Barbara the bitch! LET IT GO! I never did one thing to you bitch. Not one thing. (what would you call this, ma'am?) Leave me alone. Leave my family alone. The atthorities know all about you. They have the threatening e-mails you sent to my now defunked e-mail address. (We contacted some of our contacts at 'the authorities' - just to check - they have no such things. They don't exist) She has also been arrested many times for harrassment. (Barbara has never been charged or arrested. Ever.) She hates men to the point of trying to dystroy thier lives. If she only knew it's her life that she's destroying. It's eating away at her. Right now. As she reads this. Her blood pressure is soaring through the ceiling! I hope she has a heart attack. (again, 'Judy' would know all this how???? and who's making death threats/ death wishes here?)
(note: 'Judy' seems to be a serial cyber-harrasser)
So readers - when someone posts non-factual, nonsense made out of whole cloth about you on the web? All you can do is laugh!!! But if they DO post death threats or your personal information. Contact your police and the FBI office nearest you immediately!
13. How Dare You Tell the Truth!
Reminder: Cyberpaths HATE when you show a backbone & stand up for yourself. HATE IT!
Readers, you can see who's at fault here for yourself...
by Sandra Brown, MA
HORRIFYING! PLEASE GET INVOLVED IN STOPPING THIS
Ladies -- watch out for this:
There has been a growing field of books, e-books, seminars and training for men on how to seduce women using hypnosis!
This comes in the 'back door' of her defenses and creates the sensation of intimacy and connection where obviously none exists. Using mind control - sex can occur very rapidly without her being aware at to 'why.'
Today, hundreds of websites offer young men and adults the ability to come and be trained in person by 'seduction guru's.' If this isn't appalling enough that men are being encouraged to use 'false' ways of attaching to women, they are now teaching hypnosis and other forms of neuro linguistic programming to men all over the world.
This, in my opinion is not only emotional rape but it's the proliferation of pathology training in it's WORST form!!
To make matters worse, the sickest of all the Seduction Gurus's (who is mentally ill, bi-polar and has been hospitalized in psych hospitals) was the star of a Reality Show about seduction and his pick-up techniques hosted by VH1 called 'The Pick Up Artist.'
If you want this c*rap to stop, please write VH1 about this show at:
VH1
1515 Broadway
NY NY 10036.
They are owned by MTV Networks which is a subsidary of Viacom at the same address. So while you're at it, write to MTV Networks and Viacom.
Also, flood their phone lines at: 212-846-1753 or 212-258-7800. Let's give them an ear full!
Starve the Vampire
by Sandra Brown, MA
Author of "How to Spot a Dangerous Man"
(with some minor additions from The Exposer)
Pathological persons are energy and emotional vampires. They live off of your emotional content.
Part of their personality deficit is the lack of a stable and consistent inner core of a self concept so they need constant attention, distraction, and identity management from which they draw their identity.
Lots of their identity is acquired from their relationships since internally there is so little core self to draw from. This is part of the reason they are so exhausting.
In order to get their emotional 'blood supply' from you, they 'hook you' into conversations, arguments, or any other kind of response they can get from you. They live vicariously thru your own emotional expressions of love, frustration, confusion, etc. It doesn't always matter 'what' emotion is fed to the vampire (although narcissists like adoration) but just that there is SOME content is enough for them -- even your tears, or your screams, or your insults. It doesn't matter...they just 'need' something, anything from you in the way of content. If they don't get the blood supply/emotional content from you, they will seek it elsewhere.
(Remember Dracula? He just moved from town to town taking it where he could get it?)
When you begin to break up he will fear the loss of emotional supply. He won't fear losing you so much as he will fear not getting his identity and his sense of self from you and/or the relationship. He fears the loss of self or 'who am I without her?' This is a very fragmented ego state -- one which only exists thru relationships with others.
So when you try to break up, he may continue to contact you which is why they are hard to break up with. They are predictable in their approaches to get you to respond to them (you are feeding the vampire his emotional blood supply every time you talk to him).
These are some of his approaches and if you can get a bag of popcorn and just watch it like it was a LifeTime for Women movie and detach from it, you will see a whole movie pan out like this:
* One contact he's angry, blaming, shaming.
When you don't respond to that verbally or emotionally (think like you are lobotomized with no facial expression...that's what I want women to do with these men)* Then one contact may be sweet, loving, buy you things or sending you things.
When you don't respond...* He will promise to do what you've asked for years... go to counseling, church, take meds, be nice, go to anger managment.
When you don't respond...* He will get angry again--say you aren't working on the relationship which is why it's gonna fail;
When you don't respond...* He will quit calling for a while to make it look like he's moved on (They are boomerangs, they ALWAYS come back a few times.)
When you don't respond...* He will indicate he found someone else or had sex with someone else. (possibly one of your friends)
When you don't respond... (Are you enjoying the popcorn and movie about now??)* He becomes 'sick' -- he doesn't know what this mysterious illness is, or he has prostate cancer, leukemia, some other lethal disease.
When you don't respond...* He will just go back to drinking/ drugging/ dealing/ driving too fast/ seeing prostitutes/ etc.
When you don't respond...* He will threaten to kill himself, leave the area, never see you again.
When you don't respond...* He will take the kids (or try to), drag you through court, threaten to physically harm you.
When you don't respond...* He will tell you he's dating someone you hate or he's gone back to his previous girlfriend/ wife.
When you don't respond...* He will tell you he will kill your pet he has custody of if you don't talk to him.
When you don't respond...* He will go on the net and post about you on the exposure sites, making up the most outrageous lies and childish slander to get you to react.
When you don't respond...* It will come full circle and will begin again, at the top of this list.
When I do phone counseling, it's all the same stories. I know that women think that their experiences are unique.
But pathology is all the same. These people aren't very creative and don't deviate much from the strict internal structure that is associated with pathology. They ONLY react in certain ways so it's pretty easy to predict.
Once you are able to understand this, you can predict his sad/ silly/ stupid reactions to a break up (or exposure).
Since they live off of your emotion and NEED it, the sooner you starve him out by having no contact (unless you have to because of your kids but you adhere to no words exchanged and no emotional content on your face), the vampire will flee to the next available source to be fed.
When women don't disconnect once they understand the feeding and maintanence of pathologicals, they are doing it becuase SHE wants to remain. The ball is then in your court to figure out where you are still hung up so you can disconnect.
This is not a judgment about women not being able to leave. It is a POINTER to a place where the disengagment has hit a snag. Simply notice where the snag IS so that something can be done.
FOR MORE CLICK HERE
http://clearblogs.com/theexposer
They don't have the normal empathy the rest of us take for granted. They don't feel affection. They don't care about others. But most of them are good observers, and they have learned how to mimic those feelings remarkably well.
http://www.narcissism.operationdoubles.com/
So that the narcissist can think he seems grand, he must make you seem insignificant by comparison. This is why malignant narcissists act as though it would kill them to compliment you, to thank you for anything, to tell you they love you, to listen to you, to say they're sorry for something, to give you credit for being right about anything, to put their arm around you, to take an interest in anything you do . . . and let's just cut to the chase: they act like it would kill them give you one bit of gratification. They won't even look at you: they pay more attention to a fly on the wall.
but they're not even grand....!
They gotta have it all, you see. Nobody ever taught them to share.
uh?
Find out what narcissists don't want you to know. Get What Makes Narcissists Tick.
But treating you like you're nothing is just one of many ways they act out their fantasy that they are so grand that you are dirt under their feet. So, look out. Delusions of grandeur are hard to maintain and are constantly challenged by reality.
For example, do you have a fine reputation? Look out, that threatens the narcissist's delusion that he is the greatest, so he'll have to fix that fine reputation of yours.
Do you excel at something? Look out, that threatens the narcissist's delusion that he is the greatest, so he'll have to sabotage your work.
Do you have an outstanding personal virtue? Look out, that threatens the narcissist's delusion that he is the greatest, so he'll have to drag your virtue through the mud, attributing it to himself while he portrays it in you as a vice.
Yes, Pathological Envy is one of his middle names. I soooo agree!!!
But treating others like nothing and destroying them aren't the only ways narcissists act out their fantasy and maintain their delusions of grandeur. Those delusions evaporate without constant reinforcement, so a malignant narcissist needs to prove he's God Almighty by trampling someone about as frequently as most other predators need to make a kill. It's just more of the same. So that the narcissist can think he seems grand, he must crush you like a bug underfoot.
Therefore, if you are down and out, look out, you're going to get kicked.
Can he get away with abusing you behind closed doors? Look out. And if you try to complain, you'll be sorry, because he'll have the whole world conned ahead of time into viewing you as the malicious one who's imagining things.
Yes, Diabolo is another one of his middle names.
So right!
what's boggling though is why people believe these narcissists.
they are but self-proclaimed lords and queens of the underworld , they just thrive on delusions (yet have the gall to claim that those who have actual claims to accomplishments are the ones living in illusion).
why don't people see that without the connections and fanatics they were able to lure, they really lack the things that they so envy in other people?
is this because they have the knowledge of human emotions but they just don't have the moral boundaries to stop them from taking control of others' spheres?
are we prone to them because we have the capacity to feel guilty and they don't - and they know this so they can go at all costs without bounds, while we, we can't play the game they set before us because our conscience stops us from doing so?
how then do we stop such people from harassing us?
what if we already made sure we stay out of their way so our relationships, accomplishments, or our mere existence will not irk them (although obviously, we don't even have to do anything to annoy them)?
What if they're too afraid of the shadows they made that they continually have their loyal narcissist-wannabes haunt us and taunt us just to make us feel we're nobodies, losers ? (by their definition)
How do we even pound some sense into these people?
how can we even send the message across that we don't give a hoot whether they brand us a loser, a wino, a weirdo, a whatever?... that we just wanna be left alone. (well, if they're the benchmark of what being winners are, of what being sensible and sane is, i don't know about you but i, i'd surely wanna be on the opposite side of that spectrum.)
why are they so hell-bent in proving that we're nobodies when we don't even spend time thinking whether others consider us as "somebody".
truth be told, the tags only gain traction because of their constant reference to these boxed perceptions: "she's not somebody, she's not the person you think she is, you're the only ones who think she's somebody, blah- blah.."
somebody. nobody. anybody.
blech.
call me nobody anytime.
just leave me alone.
A predator/ narcissist is complicated but simultaneously transparent when confronted with exposure of their motives.
They are always about the next fix, so if a situation becomes difficult and they find that it is not making them feel good they will blame shift and start looking for the next target. They will never admit and are incapable of realizing that 110% they did it to themselves!
Next time they will be more careful not to get caught or figured out. And the next target gets to be on the receiving end of the heightened game.
But what if they have been EXPOSED?
The script has to change now. What does that mean?
Effort. Now they have to work harder to keep up the lie. Reputation, ego, image, humiliation. Now their avenues for prey have been depleted downward.
Now the blame shifting has become their only weapon. Make it the other person's fault, but don't stop there. Do it up big. Make themselves the victim . Turn it around and play the "poor me" card.
Always notice that at no point do they think about who they hurt, stop to feel bad about the pain they caused someone else or see that they need to STOP and realize that if it has gotten this bad, it is time to reevaluate themselves and get help. No, narcissists are incapable of this moment of self awareness.
Even though its time to wake up and THINK!
But this doesn't happen because in their eyes they are superior to everyone. Oh, they may apologize to the wife/husband/partner - but those they preyed on? Well its THEIR fault isn't it?
Then they keep finding outlets, ways to escape reality.
Being Exposed is an Intervention. Our Intervention for them. And they will only see it as a full frontal attack.
The way they respond confirms the truth that's exposed all by itself.
(here's a perfect example of how one exposed predator responded to their intervention)
x-posted to THE EXPOSER
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