My Good Friends @ MindSay

Wow, so much to update on. I know I told Amber I would tell her what I was talking about when I sent that random text. I really thought I could give us females credit, but, some of us are just dumb. I've only lived here forever and I know almost everyone here. If I don't know you, well then I know about you. I knew that these boys weren't good guys to start "talking" to or getting in a relationship with. Let's just say this female didn't get in a relationship, she just cut to the chase, if ya get what I'm saying. She's been here less then a month. But, she's one of my friends. I'm more disappointed then mad at her. I told her she should have listened. She says she regrets doing what she did, but, she still stands in the halls and talks to him. But, I won't bring myself down because she wouldn't listen to me. All I did was try and be a really good friend.

As for this other girl. This happened before ^ that one did. Ashley started to date Grant and you know I kind of was happy for her, but then things got weird. In the first few seconds they were dating Grant was all up on her and I didn't think that was really appropriate because Ashley is a virgin and he just practically met her and was still getting to know her! Well, the way he would touch her in public the way he would hold her ..I know what he wanted. Now, he won't even talk to her. I looked through his phone on the 4th of Nov. and they started to date the 2nd. There was a text from a girl named Misty and it was on the 4th. It said a bunch of stuff that I didn't like so me watching out for my friend, I asked him who Misty was right in front of him. He freaked out! Like, he grabbed his phone and was like I swear she's my ex. I swear! I was like yea whatever. I come to find out he's dating a girl in GA. He doesn't want to be with Ash and is ignoring her kind of. I don't know, I mean if I was her, I'd end it and me and Morgan being good friends, we told her what was going on. With Samantha who doesn't care about Ashley's feelings at all.

I don't know, like I said I'm not going to jump for these two.

Anyways, Ashley has a good head on her shoulders and I think she'll make the right choices.

I've been hanging out with my friends lately and sometimes we don't include all that we should because my friends aren't friends with eachother.

I need to talk about Anger, I have so much anger built up in me. Last school year ended crazy. It was a rush and now I'm here with so much anger. I guess my brother lied and told Wanda that I said hi to her. You know me. I wouldn't talk to her if she was the last person on earth or if I had to, to live. I don't like her or want anything to do with her. She's worthless. She didn't do me any good. I'm not making peace with her because I really don't need to and I don't have to. Yes, I'm stubborn, but, you would be too if you was me. You wouldn't make up with anyone if for the past 17 years your life was a living hell and now you're finally out, or you feel you made it almost all the way out. She disrespected me and I have a right to be angry.

Ha!

I know most people think it's awful to act like you don't have a mother. But, I don't. My grandma was the one that took us all in and I was the one that left. I was the one that just walked out and finally I was the one who stood up for myself. You are losers if you can't just up and leave. I tried...I know how hard it is..but its' like I took a deep breath and held it in up until she found out. When she found out, I let it out because then...I had nothing to lose.

I'm trying to find myself...

i was surprised that i got so much stuff from my friends!i don`t have a boyfriend but i think having alot of friends is more important thhen finding a bf.besides it`s not worth getting ignored and worring about if he likes what your wearing blah blah im killer hungry all i`ve eaten today was chocolate and junk.and swim suit season is comming soon!lol...

Jacqui and Tom are my friends of mind and spirit and that is why I love them.  Not in a sick way or anything.  They just make my life complete.  They accept me for who I am and what I believe.  I don't have to pretend around them.  Hell, I don't even have to wear my good clothes.  I can be down on my luck with no money in my pocket and all I have to do is wait for them to come up behind me and whisper in a freaky way "listen" in my ear and I know that I am safe.  It's funny how one word protects you from your worst fear.  My biggest fear is being alone and I know that as long as one of them says that to me, I won't be. 

Growing up is scary.  It's also amazingly fun.  When you are younger, you tell yourself that you are never going to do certain things.  What a load of crap that turned out to be.  I told myself that I would never go to Australia.  I'm saving to go.  I told myself that I wouldn't be friends with the pretty people.  Look at my friends.  I told myself that I would never go to the university of Alberta.  Guess who is there right now!  I told myself that I was gonna be an elementary teacher.  And then an actress.  And then a drama teacher.  Now look at me.  I'm gonna be an english/religion teacher.  My point is that life takes us down unexpected paths.  And if I had gone to school elsewhere or was in a different program, I would never have met all of these amazing people.  Especially Tom and Jacqui.

You might have noticed on tv shows (aka Dawson's Creek) how they talk about soulmates...well, these two are mine.  I can't wait to be their friend forever. 

  wooooow, i haven't posted in like forever. :(:(:(:( today was interesting. My whole family went clothes shopping, and I got a sweater that i really, really like.  Navy blue with rainbow stuffs.  it was kinda from the adults' section, but that okay.  it's for petite, so it works.  Didn't like much of the stuff in my section, anyway. I also got a camera that I was supposed to get for my birthday several months ago, I just never got around to picking one out. ^^;  so I'm happy about that.  yay for pictures! :)

  my new middle school is doing pretty well. it's basically right next to my old elementary school so everyone goes there plus a ton of new people because it's really big. and my old school stops at 5th grade, so at least i know i couldn't still go there even if i wanted to because then i would feel bad.  it's better than before, anyway.  And a lot more interesting.  But one thing kind of bugs me... I've met a few friends, but I really wanted to meet more... i wanted to stop being so darn quiet and just be open and talkative. but even though i'm trying it isn't happening!!!!  well, maybe I was just meant to be an introvert?  It's not so bad, you get a little lonely occasionally, but you still have good friends, at least, I do.  Luckily my friends and I do enough stuff together so I'm not always just sitting home alone, which is really good. :) oh well, all good things come in time, right..? but all the people from my old school have met like 100 people and i haven't!!!! ohh so confusing.  i need to join something, i don't know what though. i don't really like sports. i'm usually in the school play, but that doesn't start until december....oh well, i guess i just hafta wait. *sigh*

oh my gosh this is so long!!!!! wow!!!!