Moving Back Home @ MindSay 
back home
We had a meeting today, sort of a "back from vacation" thing. I got to see all of my co-workers and we got a chance to talk about this and that. I told some of them that I was going home in November and they seemed to think that was pretty cool... but the weird part is that many asked me when I was coming back. One in particular, an older, nice guy that I have spoken to on many occasions, had this dialogue with me:
"Going home in November? Must have found a new job huh? So when are you coming back to Japan then?"
"What?" I asked, "um, never. I'm going home for good."
He looked at me, somewhat shocked, "Really? You don't want to come back? You want to live in America??"
As the word "America" was said there was a bit of a shiver to the guys voice. Like it's such a bad thing. It reminded me of how I used to think, and it made me realize just how proud I am now to be an American. Now mind you, I won't go waving the flag around, buying black velvet paintings of eagles crying or voting republican... I'm not that kind of American. But I will say I enjoy the freedom, the space and the general attitude of the country of my birth. It just took a little while for me to realize it.
Back to my conversation, I was then asked what I planned to do when I got home.
"Well, I plan on being with my family and friends."
"Well, what about your Japanese friends?"
I did tell the truth. I said "They'll be fine, I have all their info and they want to visit me in the states!" What I didn't mention is that not one of the friends I have made out here is actually Japanese. Sure, I met these new friends in Japan, but they are all sorts of backgrounds... Asian and European. But no Japanese. Not one. I know more Japanese people in America then I do in Japan. And that's another reason I want to go home.
"But what about all the things Japan has to offer?"
I started to feel like he was a spokesman for the Japanese Consulate of Foreign Workers or something. I basically said that it would be best for me to live in America. Both me and my girl would prefer it (yes, I had to explain how my girl is Japanese but born in America and likes The USA better and so do I etc...)
He digested what I told him for a moment and finally said "Well that's cool. I kinds wish I could move back sometimes too... but I haven't paid taxes in the USA for over 40 years. I really can't go back".
So now I understood the disdain. Still a pretty cool guy by my standards.
For me, Japan used to mean a freedom from everything that I was used to. No more mundane, day to day routine, but instead an exciting and interesting new world to explore. Now, it means nine hour work days, low pay, high taxes, people who are constantly "too busy" to do anything (I will explain that in more detail in a later post) and long, loooooong commute times.
America used to mean boredom, no opportunities and stifling family members and friends that would keep me from doing what I wanted to do. It was too cushy, too easy, too drab. I needed to get away and do something on my own... but now, just like a painter stepping away from the easel, I can now see America for what it really is to me. Opportunities abound, free stuff all over the place, personal transportation so you can go wherever you want whenever you want, 24 hour everything, food from all around the world (and cheap), a house or very large apartment and most importantly, foreigners.
In America we are all in the same boat. We are all foreigners. America is this grand social experiment, and we've managed to all get along well enough to form one of the most powerful nations the world has ever seen. I love that I am a part of that. Anyone can be an American, but only natural born Japanese can be citizens in this country. I like our system better.
Anyways, I really do only have roughly 7 weeks of work left, so I'm going to spend most of that doing very little, especially after I give my notice of termination. This is going to be a sweet two months...
-Maru!
Summer vacation is almost over and I have to say that I am relieved. Everyday has been kind of dragging on lately and I just want to start getting my plans to go home underway. I guess I should be taking advantage of my last two months here in old Nippon, but there are two major things standing in the way:
- Cost of transportation
- I've been everywhere that I care to see in Kyoto and Osaka
It costs way too much to go places here. Getting to my girlfriend's apartment in Kyoto from my apartment in Osaka takes no less than two hours, 1,000 yen and involves changes trains and busses multiple times. If I wanted to go to Kobe or Wakayama it would cost another 2,000 yen round trip and frankly, I'm very broke at the moment. I have had to use credit just to buy food lately, so travel isn't much of an option.
Okay, so why not go somewhere local, right? Because honestly, I've seen everything I want to. Oh sure, there are more temples and stores and such, but (aside from the fact that they all cost money which I don't even have at the moment) I'm not that interested in seeing another temple or shop. Shops are only good if you have some cash to blow, which I believe I have firmly established that I do not.
As for temples, I am not a very religious person so I view most temples, no matter how beautiful, as a waste of resources. I've noticed a tendency for people who were raised Christian but no longer consider themselves as such to have a reverence for Asian religions, citing them as more spiritual. I personally view Asian religions o be just as silly as their western counterparts, but more wasteful in terms of land and materials used to build the shrines and temples.
So I've spent the pat week playing "Heroes" with some friends in Kyoto and watching the Olympics. The past two days sleeping exceedingly late, but the rest does feel good. School starts again on September 1st, so I guess this post is also a prediction for my activities next week as well. I have 11weeks remaining in Japan, 6-8 of which will be spent working and 2-3 which will be spent cleaning and moving. I will try to post an article about moving back to one's home country about the middle of October, as that is when the bulk of my moving adventure will take place.
Anyways, I'm getting super excited about going back home. But for now I think I'm going to take another nap.
*yawn*
-Maru!
So, this whole moving to Houston thing isn't working.
Financial aid wouldn't even begin to cover the cost of tuition at the college I wanted to go to. Therefore, I can't enroll because I can't pay for it.
This means Rob and I are moving back to Carlsbad, here within the next week.
This sucks. Big eggs.
Oh well, though, cuz financial aid and scholarships back home pay for all my tuition, books, and fees and still leave me with over 2 grand in spending change.
Gotta admit, I will miss freeway driving now that I've gotten the hang of it.
I love music, always have and always will. There is something about shedding your pains and picking up your joys and you can do both through music. I heard this song a couple months while I was driving home from work....it usually takes no more than 10 minutes to get home, but this day it took almost 20 minutes.
If you fast forward past the Steve Harvey intro I think you will enjoy it. The artist is very soulful and inspiring. As tears fell from my eyes I thought about what life had been for his family in comparison to my mothers and as horrible as I thought it was Mommy and Daddy went back home. They not only went back home on the river but they were able to take Moms mother.
There is one specific line "i held my breath when they diped my head and I came up shiny and knew"... that touched my more than others the realization that sometimes you not only have to let go and move on but remember what you have. I never thought Mississippi was meant for me, but I don't know how much longer it will be before I either move there to be with my parents or at least closer. Im ready to not only sit by the river but jump in for a dip and starting new.
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