Monday @ MindSay

                                                     

 

I haven't been sleeping well the last few days because I am anticipating Monday since it is my therapist and my last session.  I have already been crying about it and I know I am going to be an absolute mess after our session.  I am doing my best to keep it together but when you grew up with abandonment issues like i did, for me, it feels the same.  So, I would appreciate all the good vibes and prayers you all could give me.

So far the day's gone by pretty quickly. This morning I had fixed a cup of coffee and began reading e-mails when my boss popped into my cube before she even got to her own office, wanting to know how the wedding went on Friday. I spent a good part of the morning showing and re-showing my photos to various co-workers. By the time I actually began working it was nearly lunch time.

 

Oh, wow. I just looked up and out the window and there's a torrential downpour outside. Definitely wasn't like that five minutes ago. Yikes, I hope this doesn't spell trouble for Lauren and TJ... their flight leaves this afternoon. A delayed flight is not the way to start a honeymoon.

 

I really have a case of the Mondays today. I was able to make some headway with my project insofar as making sure that other people have what they need in order to do their parts, but beyond that? Nada. It feels like my thoughts are caught in a really thick fog... they're there, I know that, but I can't seem to find one thought to grasp onto for more than a few minutes at a time.

 

I partly blame this on my apartment building's industrial fire alarm, which went off this morning at 3:00 a.m. I woke to the shrill crys of the alarm, jumped out of bed, turned on the light in the living room, and rushed to the front door to look out the peek hole. Not sure whether this was a false alarm or the real deal, I was caught in that half-awake terror of trying to decide whether to go back to bed or to attempt at rounding up the cats. A few of my neighbors were chatting on the front steps outside my balcony, so I opened the door and asked them what was going on. A police officer had already shown up and had determined the situation to be a false alarm, which was a relief in many ways. It would have been fun trying to corral the cats (Ollie was cowering under my bed, and Chloe under the couch) into a broken carrier.

 

Of course by the time a member of the local fire company came to shut off the alarm I was too keyed up to go back to sleep. I laid in bed and reassured my two frazzled furries until they both curled up tight to my sides and drifted off to sleep. Then I did the same.

 

Haha, just listened to a voicemail from TJ about setting up the Dark Knight theatre bum-rush for the 18th next week. Don't worry, TJ, I'll have it all under control. :)

 

All right, guess I better start working for real. At least the rain stopped.

 

 

iFeel:  apathetic

iTunes: co-worker on the phone

This intriguing woman wrote to me on one of the dating sites that I peruse from time to time.  I have tried yahoo personals, and it seemed like all the women wanted someone who made over $50,000 a year, and a fattie wouldn't be their cup of tea.  I also tried Eharmony, and told them that I went to church on a regular basis.  I got every Jesus loving woman in America write to me, many from places I would not even want to visit, much less move to.  I wish they would have told me of everybody local, and let me pick my own person.

 

 

Anyway, there was a woman from a town near Columbia that I wrote to.  She had said hey there on one of her opening lines free from the company, and I said that I would like to talk to her.  She wrote back that she would like to talk to me too.  I called the bank line telling you how much money you had in the bank, and they said enough to cover the first month, so I said yeah, boyyyy.  I wrote to her last night.  She wrote to me, and I'll just take it from their.  Darryl met his current girlfriend from there, and although she is cute, her and Darryl really aren't a great match.  But he is currently happy, while looking for other women to date.  He goes through women like I go through underwear, a new one every three months or so.  (Just kidding.  I change every day or so, whenever I shower.)

 

Anyway, I was thinking of moving to Columbia, and since she lives near there, I figure why not write to her.  I did, and I gave her my Yahoo mail address, and phone number, but she just wants to converse using the web site, whiich is okay with me.  I try not to go too fast at times, because I don't want her to think I am desperate,  which is a trait that I DO like in a woman.  (Just kidding.  But, I do like the women with lowered expectations.  If I were rich and good looking and a good dancer, I wouldn't have trouble meeting women.)

 

Well, we have had rain all day.  We cancelled the picnic at church today for the park, and instead had it down in the basement of the church because of the heat.  A big rain went through all afternoon when I was sleeping, and I woke up and it was 68o on the bank clock.  It was really good.  My brother had a cookout, where he cooked ribs and pork steak, and Caron and Darryl's girlfriend said that they almost needed a sweatshirt.  I told them to enjoy it while they could.  It will be nice Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, then it will be a little warmer on Thursday and Friday, and in the upper 80s on the weekend.  At least we haven't had the problems that Cedar Rapids and Iowas City had over the last week.  I have a friend who used to live in Iowa City, and I visited him there, and we went to a minor league baseball game in Cedar Rapids.  Minor league baseball is something like the Royals and Pirates have, but without the big salaries.

 

Well, I am really watching my money until I get my check from the George Bush re-election fund.  I have heard a lot of people only getting $300 each instead of the promised $600.  I owe a phone bill of a hundred dollars, and have to get my truck licensed in July, so that might take a lot of my money.  I was planning on having the extra money so I could spend a little that wouldn't be absolutely necessary, instead of having to borrow money from my brother to get by the rest of the month.

 

Well, I cleaned my house, sort of.  I listened to Joel Osteen on TV while I cleaned the kitchen and the bathroom.  I straightened up the front room while I was watching Siskel and Roeper.  It is still sloppy looking, but not filthy.  I got three bags of trash from the front room, mostly stepped on Newsweeks and Times that were on the floor.  I picked up two Kmart bags of trash from the front room.

 

Speaking of Kmart, I bought three pairs of pants in my usual size, and I couldn't fit into them.  Gosh I need to exercise.  Darryl gave me a bike that he had bought so he could ride with one of his ex girlfriends.  They need tire work, but I'll take them over to Brother Harry's, my friend from church.  He fixed an old bike up for me, and it was okay, but wouldn't go into low gear.  I could ride for about a mile, but couldn't ride across town to Caron's, which is about five miles away.  I figure that if I ride a bike around town, I will get in better shape, while limiting my gas spending.

 

Well, this is a rather long slice of life, so I'll say goodbye.  Tata for now, Dougie Fresh