Mikko @ MindSay

Today was Mikko's 18th birthday^_^ :D it was alot of fun. Today started out with Chris's mom calling me at 11am ish telling me the plans for later on (will get to this later on). I then got up and called mikko, and told him I'd call in an hour for him to come over. So, then i got some breakfast, and hurried to finish the scrapbook. Once i was done, i called him up. After he called me, cole then asked if she could come over, and she did. before mikko came over, i grabbed a slab of cake my mom had made the other day, stuck some candles in it, and waited for mikko and cole to arrive. Cole arrived first, and mikko came moments later. before he entered my room, cole made him stop in the hallway so i could light the candles:P once they were lit I sang happy birthday and he blew them out:P for an hour or so the 3 of us just hung out, ate cake, and i gave mikko his present^_^

at about 3:30,  cole left to cassy's. Mikko and I couldn't go over to chris's yet, so we just kinda cuddled and such. he wanted to leave at 4:30, but i made sure we didn't leave till after 5, because that's when everything would be ready at chris's. Once we got to chris's, we (samara, kyle, mitch, chris, chris's mom and I) all shouted surprise and sung happy birthday. Then we had pizza, and saved the cake for later.

About an hour later at 6, we went to the movies and saw Never back down, which was good. we had an hour and a half we had to waste before the movie, but that's okay. We all got back at chris's at 10:20, and I left around 11, and now I am at home:P

So in all it was a really good day. He liked the scrapbook, as did everyone that saw it^_^ And I promise i will add the pictures of it on in a few days for everyone to see.

anyways, im kinda tired, so off to bed with me. Nighty night.

-:DKristal:D

so earlier, i blogged saying I was feeling like shit, wanting to cry, and such.

That, was just me having a paranoia moment. Basically, me being like "is he going to come over today? does he still love me?" etc etc. Even when i was being paranoid, i knew he still loved me, i was just worried.

And yes, he did come over today, and it was great just to hold him and hug him without a single bad thought in my mind...

*sigh* to be 19 right now....

-:)Kristal:)

P.S. apparently, when im really really happy, my eyes are gold:)

So, its the easter weekend. I really don't have much planned. Basically I plan on doing a bunch of stuff that's on my "To Do" list that I made up a few days ago. Mikko was supposed to come in town, but because everything's closed on the days he wanted to go places, he decided to re-schedule until next weekend.

For the last little while, I've been just making copies of CDs I have, for Mikko, because he's been wanting to add some Cradle of Filth to his MP3.

Speaking about mp3s, I don't know if i mentioned this or not, but both of mine are broken..I get a new 4gig  within the next couple days for free due to the warrenty, and as for my 16gig..they clamied that i sat on it (which i didnt) so I have to write a letter to the company in order for me to get a new one, even though its under warrenty:|. Meh, oh well...

Tomorrow I'm going to run around town handing in resumes to different places, because I want to actually get a good job as soon as possible. I'm sick of flyers..and I'm not volunteering anymore because I don't really have the time anymore, plus everythings changing around there....

That's pretty much all the news I have for now:P

-:|Kristal:)

today is 3 months for Mikko and I

^_^

yay!

I love him<3 <3

-:DKristal:D

*Mikko looks into my eyes*

Me: "I know i have transparent eyes...its because my soul was taken long ago..."

Mikko: *shakes head* "No...thats not what it means at all. Your eyes are the gateway to look into your soul, and I can see everything. They are transparent because your soul is trying to break free and unleash itself of a burden"

Transparent eyes..transparent eyes......it kept on echoing and echoing as lines in a poem....

This was my dream last night. When i opened my eyes this morning, "Transparent Eyes" kept on echoing in my mind. I could not remember the poem that was in my dream, but i did remember the conversation between Mikko and I in the dream, and the phrase "Transparent Eyes." I then got up, ate breakfast and as i just got breakfast, Mikko phoned me. We then made plans to hang out for the rest of the day. So hours later, we were at my house, laying down watching tv in my bedroom. I was kinda just looking at his face..not really his eyes, but at his face (as odd as that may sound). He then looked at me.

"Hum?" I asked

"Nothing, just admiring your eyes" He said

We then just continued laying there, watching tv. About a half hour before he had to go, we got to talking about past relationships (very vaguely..not in detail..more like the heartbreak of it and comparing it to our relationship now). I then got to talk about my depression and the hardest times in my life and everything, and about how i thought i was in love before when in reality it was just strong infatuation.....So basically i just ended up opening up (no sexual reference..trying to be serious here) to him a little bit more. Sure, he knew things before, but i now got to go into detail. I guess you could say, a little bit of my soul was finally unleashed to him.

Was this just a dream? Was having transparent eyes just a "What if?" question in my mind, or is it a reality? Did he look into my eyes, see my soul and get me to break a part of it off to releave myself of a burden i had on myself? Because when i woke up this morning, i did have this feeling of heavy emotion which i had no clue what it was...

- Kristal