Midterm @ MindSay 
school
Working at the department store is giving me some good perspective about my life and its trivial problems. A number of shoppers are accompanied by mentally retarded people, and yesterday one couple was pushing in a wheelchair a young boy who seemed to have some sort of palsy disorder or something, and he had a piece of cloth stuck in his mouth like a gag. Seeing people like this makes me really appreciate the fact that I am physically sound, and even though I have bipolar, it is a mild case of the disorder, and aside from that I am mentally sound, with a high IQ that I should be grateful for. Compared to what some of those people go through, my problems are nothing.
Either way, life is fun. I'm ready for break. Except my mom recently decided to bully me from like 2000 miles away. JESUS H LEAVE ME ALONE! Yeah whatev.
Today has not been a good day for me. Not a good day at all, and it's partially due to a certain someone.
Have you ever heard the quote "Too many chiefs not enough indians"? Well in this case, when you get two leaders working together there is bound to be some brunting of heads. And in this case, I just don't give a fuck. so fuck it!
I stayed up all night monday at the library working on a 10 page midterm essay, as well as my share of the work for the canadian literature conference....I put a whole lot of work into this project.
Today while in my german class I get a message from my partner "Hi Kevin, this is 'R.....' I just wanted to let you know I finished the power point presentation and printed out all the handouts. If there is anything you wanted to add that would be okay. I'll talk to you later." Click.
WHAT THE FUCKING HELL!?!?!?!?
How the hell could you have possibly finished the damn powerpoint presentation when I haven't even given you the damn notes I took the time to prepare?? WTF?
Why even bother having my name on the damn introduction slide with hers?? it's not like she even gave me a chance to contribute anything. In the begining of our preparation I got so damn tired of having to chopdown and concise her sentences it became a prison term. She was totally missing the big picture for our topic, because she so fervently went on tangents that had no real bearing on our mission...it was rediculous...All I did was cleanup after her stupidity...
So after about 10 minutes of rage, I simply decided fuck it. I just dont' give a fuck. I sent an email to the professor bullshitting some thing about having some sort of huge exam that I couldnt' miss this thursday and I wouldn't be able to make it up. So I dropped out of the conference entirely. She replied back with a "dissapointed" tone in the email. It kinda made me feel bad, but then again FUCK IT!
If my so called partner wants to create the worlds crappiest presentation then by all means, she can ride that one way ticket to hell herself. Obviously she never really needed my information in the first place. I really hate that about this girl.
She has this attitude of superiourity around her that she just loves to so innocently flaunt, when in reality she's dumb as fuck. She is failing all her courses, and both classes that we are in together. She's the kind of person that you just can't handle for long amounts of time without the want to cut yourself...
I've really had enough of her this year, and I would hope our 'friendship' slowly dies off the next year....
Please allow me to rip my hair out of my head right about......now.
Words cannot even begin to describe the amount of stress surging through my body right now. I'm not even joking this past two days has been absolutely destructive to my general well being. I am sitting in the library right now typing a ten page midterm essay on three different topics...and I had to just pick the hardest ones, right?
1.) Why is Stephen Crane's "The Open Boat" an example of Literary Naturalism? What ironies in the story contribute to its themes and what kind of ethic does Crane offer in the aftermath of Darwin?
2.) "Stopping by Woods on A Snowy Evening" is one of Robert Frost's most famous poems. If Walt Whitman had composed the poem, how might he have ended it and why?
3.) Is Edna a vile woman who perpetrates a set of dangerous cultural attitudes in The Awakening or a heroine who shows America how the world of Victorian values is incompatible with a woman's desires for a happy and satisfying life?
Yes, I have decided to answer those 'short' questions for my midterm essay. I even thought those were going to be the most easy, but alas I was wrong. I am wracking my brain over this right now and it doesn't help that this godforsaken dungeon of a library has the heat on so damn high.
But this isn't the extent of my night. Oh no. I still have to prepare the rest of that presentation for the Canadian Literary Conference this thursday. And my partner is not exactly helping the way I would like her to. The problem I feel is that we are both Leaders and we all know what happens when you get two Leaders and Not enough followers. This is an Academic Conference not some highschool presentation. There are going to be Professors from different countries as well as Grad Students and Counselate Members. This is not just some leisure trip.
Or maybe I am putting too much effort into all of this....I don't know right now. I just feel incredibly stressed...
I need a beer....
I just left the welding lab at school after doing the midterm. And I'm not too happy right now, in fact I'm kind of dissappointed with myself.
I didn't pay close enough attention to or misread the diagram of all the welds we were to do and I just got in a hurry and welded one of the welds in the wrong position.
I was so sure that I had passed and was so proud 'til one of my classmates pointed out the mistake. I asked Roger, our instructor, about it and he said it will probably cost me a half a grade point.
So, now I am thinking I probably got a two-five or lower, meaning I might not have even passed. I think I'd be very lucky to get a three-point on it.
God, what a freaking bummer. I got myself all worked up about it earlier this month, I should have known I was going to fuck up. Everytime I get excited and think something good is going to happen to me stuff like this happens. Why do I even let myself get excited in the first place? I mean I must have ginxed myslef or something.
And on top of that I burnt my thumb and middle finger. I'm really feeling kind of shitty right now after all that.
I could use a drink right about now.
AGGGGHHHH FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mark
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