Meet I @ MindSay

Happy Friendship Day Katelin !

I am here, sitting at the computer, just having a million and one things going through my mind, but seriously, all I can think of is Katelin. It was exactly one year ago today that I met someone who I never would have believed that we would be a great of friends as we are now.  She is the most perfect best friend a girl could ask for. I need to explain myself a little more, as to we met, and why I believe we met.

As some of you may or may not know, a year and a half ago, my best friend, Michael decided to stop talking to me for no apparent reason. I was distraught, broken, alone and hurt so deep, that I believed that I would be alone in this world, with no friend like that again. Of course I had Genio, he would be there for me through thick and thin, but this was my best friend. We shared everything together, but it was gone in an instant. 8 years of friendship just vanished before my eyes. Three months had passed, and I was still broken. This happened at the beginning of June, and around the middle of June, another friend of mine told me about this place called Mindsay. I had been searching around for the best place to host a website, and I had a Xanga, but was unhappy with it, and I settled here. It was a perfect fit. It was a place for me to talk. Talk to people and for people to hear me. But it was not for another 6 months that I would be alone, and with this feeling over my head that there would never be another best friend for me in the world. Deep, deep in my heart, I always believed that what had happened with him and I would just fade away, and go away, but I did not. I think a part of me still wishes that, no matter what anyone says, but that is something I have to keep hidden, and to myself. I had to teach myself to be strong and move on. So, after having my blog for about 6 months, I went this girl named Lauren. She was awesome. And I always say on her blog history that there was this person ‘seekingclarity’ always there. I instantly felt a connection to it, since it had the word ‘clarity’ in it. And that being a John Mayer song, yeah, you get the picture! ;) Anyway, I got to know ‘seekingclarity’ and more and more I found we had a general interest, and that being, the ever so amazing Mr. John. Mayer. It was not after a few weeks, it came up in the comments that Lauren was actually Katie’s sister, and I had never known that. So, really, me and Katie and friends because Lauren. I will always be thankful for Lauren for that. I was thankful for her coming to my blog, for me having the instinct of going to Lauren’s blog and then clicking on Kate’s link, and voila. I wonder where Lauren got the link for my blog? Anywho that is not the point. The point is that it was over this love we both shared for John Mayer that we got to know each other a lot more, and trusted each other more and more with things, personal, social, emotional, physical and everything shared together. It was always as if, we were two people who were meant to be. I know it might sound cheesy, but I don’t mean it in any way by that. I will make a confession right here, right now. I prayed for 6 months straight for God to give me a sign that I will be okay. I believe, in every bone of my body that He helped me, and then I met Kate. God helped me feel whole again by granting me the chance to be friends with her. My life changed when we started talking more and more, and then added each other to MSN and exchanges phone numbers and addresses. It was all so much fun to feel this instant connection with someone what you felt so comfortable with so fast. I never hesitated telling Kate anything that was going on in my mind.  I trusted her so much with everything that I was. I so needed someone like her. She is perfect.

Let me tell you about Kate. She is in her last year of high school. She has a shit load of lip glosses. She loves a lot of music. She loves John Mayer. She wants to be an eye doctor. She loves reading and she loves books. Her favourite author is Dean Kootz. I bought two books by him, just because she said that he was a great writer, and he is! She is allergic to a lot of food. She has two siblings and a half brother. She loves her Daddy. She works in a movie theatre. She loves John Mayer. Her new found hobby is taking photographs of awesome things. She never really likes having her picture taken, but when she does have it take, she turns out magnificent in them. She loves to write. She has been woman of the month for 2 months. She is extremely smart. She loves being silly. She loves the stuff I have sent her in the mail. She framed some of the black and white 8 by 10 black and while photographs I took last year in my photography class. She gets sick frequently. It breaks my heart when I hear she is sick with all them dam infections. I wish I could take them away for her. She has a tattoo. She loves food. Especially Mexican. She loves being random, just like her sister. She loves movies. She loves pink nail polish, or polish for that matter. She loves John Mayer. She loves all kinds pets. She had two dogs and a cat, which are totally adorable. A lot has happened in her life, but she is one hell of a strong person, and she is still standing and she will continue to stand because she is amazing. I could go on and on about what I know about her. But there was a time I thought I lost her.

It was around the end of April of this year, and early May. Some stuff happened over there, in her life, and it was a not so good time with her. I tried everything that I could to be as much as a friend to her as I possibly could. She birthday is March 19. I had not sent out her birthday gift yet, since I was still searching for all the best and awesome things to put in this box to make sure that she had one HELL of a birthday present.  So, anyway, she stopped talking to me. I was devastated. I could not believe that it was happening to me again. I was so broken by Michael, that I never wanted it to be with her and I. I did everything that I could to get her to talk to me. But nothing. I felt the pain and the sadness in my heart. There were only two people who knew about this, Genio and my friend Jade. No matter what anyone said to me, this was something I had to battle, and try to win. But I felt like I was getting nowhere. My birthday is May 31, and I thought that maybe, just maybe she would send me an e-mail for my birthday, but nope. I was about ready to explode from the feelings that were inside me. It was getting to a point where I could not handle the sadness anymore. But I always put on the strong face for everyone. But there were times where I just broke down crying in Genio’s arms because I did not want to lose Katelin. So, within that time frame, I had finialized her present and I had it sitting in my room in the box and everything, ready to send it off to her. But I was afraid. What if I send it, and she throws it in the garbage? Or her Dad sees it and says who the fuzz was Danielle. So many thoughts were going through my mind. But, I sent out the package. I had mixed feeling. But I waited and I waited and I waited for word from her. Then, one day, I checked my e-mail, and there it was, an e-mail from Kate. I saw the name in my inbox and I began to cry. I was listening to Kelly Clarkson “You Found Me” at the time, and I found how the lyrics fit so perfect to what we were about and how I found her and how she found me. I read the e-mail, with no word of a lie, millions of tears streaming down my face. I finally had heard from her. I tried talking to friends of Kate’s friend who were on Mindsay. I tried every measure to get to her to let her know I missed her so much. It was a difficult time, and it took a few days to get back the sadness that we both had. When she started to talk to me again, I was so happy. I got the one person back into my life that helped me learn to be strong. I only wish I could do the same for her.

I care about Kate so much. People frown down upon long distance friendships like this. I know that my parents at the beginning could not believe that I was giving myself to Kate and telling her things that I had not told anyone before kind of thing. I told my parents about Kate and how we had made a close relationship and that we had been talking for a long time and that we wanted to exchange addresses. I had to ask. And I did. My Dad was like “are you sure you want to do this?” and I said “yes, with all my heart. She is my best friend”. He said alright, and there it was. I talk about Kate in my house all the time. My Mom asked about her, Krystyna asks about her and Allie too, and my Dad too :P I always wish that Kate could live next door to me. But then again, when I think about it, I would never have the chance to miss her so much that when I see her online I just right out of my skin. I would wait for hours for her to come online, just so that I could talk to her. Talking to her makes me so happy that I want to scream at the top of my lungs. (ten points for anyone who can same the song that lyric is from) I can recall the first time I talked to her on the phone. OH her voice =) it’s just too precious for words. It was an incredible feelings having her live, right there, sitting or standing and just talking to me. She took the time out of her day, to be there and talk to me. It was an incredible feeling. I love really talking to her. I love the way she says my name. I love her laugh.

I love you Katelin. I love all of the great stuff we have done. I love all the great stuff we are doing. I love all great stuff we will be planning to do. My life has changed so much in one year, and one of the things I am most proud of is you. You are a beautiful girl, extremely smart and amazing and just so warm to everyone. I can sit here and tell the world how much I care about you, and just how much you mean to me, but I will say this. You are and forever will be the best I go to when I need laughs, love, support, someone to make me smile, to cry with, to be a girl with. One day, when the time dictates, we will meet. And I will be able to see your face right in front of mine, and I can do the one thing that friends do all the time and underestimate it… is hug. One day I will hug you and everything will just melt away. And it will be you, me and John Mayer playing in the background with the smell of our 7 thousand cakes in the oven. God has blessed me with an another angel in my life. You. You make me so happy, so proud, so loved, so everything. You are my everything. You are everything a girl could want in a friend. No matter what has happened to you or me or us, I want you to know, I will always be here for you, no matter where life takes you. Even if we don’t talk to days or weeks or months, it never means that I don’t think about you. I think about you all the time.

I know in my heart we will see each other face to face, and it will be the most amazing moment ever. Why? Because I get to see my best friend in the whole wide world.

You.

Happy Friendship Day!

I love you so much beautiful!

Have a great day and remember…

lulas family always<3

-Dania

p.s-- here is her entry =) http://seekingclarity.mindsay.com/happy_friendship_day_dania.mws

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and now for the awesome pictures =)

and so many more =)