Magazine @ MindSay

I'm sure you've all seen the Obama cover of the New Yorker. Well, this was done for McCain. 

I am about to submit this poem to a magazine. If it is accepted, I will be paid $4.00. I have a new telescope. I wanted to see the stars. Instead, I bumped my head really hard, and felt as if I went dancing on mars.

The Cab's new album Whisper War -- Augh, so before I even get into the album, I have a few complaints. I try very hard to give you guys a little bit of background about the band or the album before I get into the music; it helps set the scene for what I'm about to talk about. One of my biggest frustrations is when bands act like they're big and then don't even have a damn 'About Us' section. And sometimes, that wouldn't bother me, but with this band in particular, it's like they're nothing but pretty faces with no personality.

I'm going to be honest with you; I'm very torn on this album. Half of me loves it and the other half is disgusted with it. It's nothing but pure boy band fluff -- pretty faces (their pianist looks like a freaking girl) with pretty voices (and they do sound really good) singing trite and angst-ridden lyrics (who is this "girl" that everyone keeps singing to?). "Vegas Skies" is an entire song dedicated to (of course) "girl", alcohol references, and lyrics that sound like the poetry I used to write when I was twelve and thought my life was OVER because I got in a spat with my best friend. But if you can manage to completely ignore the lyrics, the steady piano and the light violins in the background combined with the acoustic bridge makes it a song that could really pull on your heartstrings. "One Of THOSE Nights" is the track that is most like their city- and labelmates Panic! At The Disco, but with a really shallow boy band twist. Believe me, if you're looking for a Panic! fix, don't come here. That's not to say this song isn't enjoyable on it's own, because it does have it's moments -- and can I just say, the electric guitar solo in the background near the end made me laugh the first time I heard this song. Seriously guys, what the hell was that? And "Risky Business"? Pretty sure I've heard this before... oh wait, "London Beckoned Songs About Money Written By Machines"! Except P!ATD did it incredibly better, with real lyrics and relevant references. But now I'm just poking fun at them, rather than actually reviewing them.

Now if you're okay with a boy band that literally sucks other genres into it and spits it back out onto a cd, then these guys will be great for you. I like a little bit more substance in my music, but I'm not everyone. All in all, The Cab sound like a shallow Panic! At The Disco trying to include their *NSYNC boyfriends in an attempt to build a Maroon 5 / All Time Low hybrid album. If that sounds appealing to you (and I know of a few people that it will) then go ahead and get them. I mean, they honestly make a great attempt at a boyband, and will probably be the heartthrobs of the rising generation -- but keep in mind, this is the same rising generation that has photos of themselves in their bras and panties at the tender age of 13.

Story of the Year's The Black Swan -- Story Of The Year or SOTY as they are also referred to, come back with a bound and determined attitude to take the success they felt on their first album, but couldn't generate from their second album, and get it back. This is their first album with Epitaph Records, but they've brought back their Page Avenue producer John Feldmann in hopes of reigniting the flame of success. SOTY is to be a headliner the upcoming 2008 Vans Warped Tour and then heading to Europe to play the Groezrock festival, after which a tour of Australia is in the works, all in hopes of promoting the new album. Epitaph is brutal.

So let's talk about this. They're saying their first single off of this album is "Wake Up" but it sounds far, far too much like a cookie-cutter single to have it be worth much of anything in my opinion. Trite lyrics like "one by one the pieces fall" and "are we missing what it is to be alive?" Whether I'm missing it or not is my problem, not your's; and if I am missing what it is to be alive, I certainly don't think I should be taking advice on it from you. That's not to say it doesn't sound good, it just sounds like everything else. So if you're okay with a copy of a copy of a copy, then sure, "Wake Up" is the perfect single for you. However, if you're looking for the real gem of this album, if you'll direct your attention to "Tell Me (P.A.C.)" you might actually find something worth being interested in. While a good deal of the album sounds like itself, and this track really isn't all that different, it does seem much more explosive and anthemic -- much like their singles from Page Avenue which is really what we're all looking for. The piano interlude with his desperate voice truly is what makes this song. SOTY also tries to break out a little bit with "Terrified" where they actually play the piano and it's a little bit more gentle, a little bit more emo, but again, it just doesn't stand out enough to make it really something.

The entire album subscribes to fast and hard slinging guitars and screaming, emotional lyrics. But it really doesn't set itself apart as anything special and something that you need to go out of your way to get. A decent listen except the songs all blend into each other. They don't distinguish themselves from one another. All in all, if you want angst and guitars and screams, go listen to "F.C.P.R.E.M.I.X." by The Fall Of Troy. They do it much better than these guys.

Death Cab For Cutie's "I Will Possess Your Heart". - Who would have thought that an eight and a half minute song could be so enthralling, particularly when the lyrics don't even begin until after halfway through the song? Apparently Death cab For Cutie did, and personally, I think they got this one just right. It's hard to imagine this song without the beginning being so drawn out and sprawling; I'd call it an intro but it's so much more than that. It's the steady climb of levels and sliders and slightly out of focus riffs until it builds and then tapers off into the perfect volume for Ben Gibbard's deliciously mellow voice as he strikes the same bargain that I often strike with women: Just give him a chance. Some have called this single 'creepy' or 'desperate'. I call it honest and sincere and really, it just hits the spot on all of the things I've wished I could have in a song.

"How I wish you could see the potential, the potential of you and me..." Give adorable Mr. Gibbard a chance - listen to his new single. I promise you won't be disappointed.

[Edit!]: Just got my hands on the radio edit of their single and oh, Mr. Gibbard -- why would you let them get rid of that delicious sprawling that gave this single so much volume and strength? Rather than the climactic buildup we are simply launched into a song that just seems... empty and flat-line without the introduction. *Sighs* Such is the way with radio sometimes. I'm really grateful that we're moving towards music becoming entirely online -- it means we have to destroy beautiful songs less.[/Edit!]