Life Update @ MindSay

HUGE RANT WARNING

I know this is a rant, but if I don't disclose it all here, I'm going to explode.

The week has made me want to take a dose of shotgun mouthwash. Worst of all, it's not even over. I was scheduled to work Thursday thru Sunday until I got a call at 9 PM on Tuesday by a manager, being asked to close for a sick co-worker. I needed the tips so I went in. I wasn't told literally none of the closing duties had been done. Needless to say, I was there until 3 AM. I stayed up literally all night on Wednesday night to help my Fiance study for a test she needed to pass, in order to pass the semester. I got about 2 hours of sleep today, Thursday, before going in to for my closing shift at work, getting out at 3:30 AM because it was extremely busy due to homecoming week. I have classes tomorrow that I have to attend if I want any chance at succeeding this semester. I also have to work the 8 hour closing shift tomorrow through Sunday. I get paid tomorrow but it has to go straight to pay rent and bills.

That's not even the half of it, though. My Fiance's sister, who is up to her eyeballs in debt for a car she couldn't afford, and her boyfriend are staying the night at our apartment tonight because they didn't pay their electric bill. Speaking of electric bill, let me interject here, I pay the one for our apartment, and yet I get yelled at when I tell people they need to turn off the lights, computer, TV, etc. when they're not using them, and furthermore, the repairman from our realty company came today, without warning, and winterized everyone's A/C and pilot-lit their gas heaters in our entire complex. It was 80 degrees outside today. I was about to burn down the Realty Office, to say the least, if I didn't have to go to work. It made me decide not to renew the lease when December comes. I will be looking for a small house to rent.

Anyway, I was told they would not be staying another night, but not because my Fiance told them they couldn't, it's because my Fiance's younger brother is coming down to visit for the homecoming game and "we" promised him a place to stay.

I'm pissed off at this for a few reasons. I was never formally asked about any of this. It was always "(Fiance's sister's name and boyfriend) are staying here tonight" and "It's okay if (Fiance's little brother) stays here for the game, right? I don't want him to stay with (Fiance's sister and BF) because they might smoke pot with him there."

Interjecting again, this ties into something else I realized. All my "friends" here are actually just friends by association of my Fiance. I really don't have any friends in this city. But it pisses me off that the largest social gatherings here happen while I'm working, and I'm tired of being lied to that "they're you're friends, too." They never voluntarily initiate conversation, electronically or physically. A recent weekend when my Fiance went out of town, I spent the entire weekend working, sleeping, and cleaning. Not a single "friend" of mine ever contacted me or showed up at the door the entire weekend.

Back on subject, my answer should have been: No, they're not staying here. They still fucking owe us money. I don't give a shit. AND Who cares? I like to smoke pot. Maybe he does as well.

A small note, here. I do smoke marijuana occasionally. I am very sensitive to it, unlike my Fiance, who doesn't get a high from it at all. Even with shwag, it only takes me a few hits to feel good. My Fiance and I got into a related argument over it this weekend. She's fine with me smoking, but doesn't want it anywhere inside our apartment. I can understand this, but I believe I should be allowed to keep a very small amount for personal use. I'm not going to lie. I feel much less depressed and more energetic for days on end after I take a few hits of something. I'm just going to have to concede that she doesn't understand it as I do and get over it.

To sum it all up, here, I'm just feeling used, rushed, fractured, and I'm literally sick (flu) on top of it all right now, and I hope it'll get better.

So its defintly been a while...what's new with me? Well i finally moved abck to Sault ste marie, working full time, and helping out with the iscf in two high school that my youth pastor just started up this year. I'm going to in april be see hillsongs united, hawk nelson, casting crowns, and a few other big bands live for aquire the fire, and will see the grits, amanda falk, rebecca st james, and others live in winnipeg for yc in may. I'm going to urkaine summer of 2008 for a missions trip as well, am starting school here at the college for ece, and am taking corresponents for central bible college for childrens/youth pastor. I am going out, with a great christian guy, and just love bing back, catching up with friends i grew up with, and just hanging around.

old memories have come back, expeccially with the bon soo, the annual winter carnival every year, happening right now. I'm enjoying hanging out with cousins and my grandparents all the time as well...and beign an only child is nice. Things have been busy here, but at the same time having awsome times, meeting new people, and just helping out with everything. I'm getting a cell here on sat while getting nails done and having a girls day with a friend, then going to great grandma's 90th b-day celebreation, so it'll be an interestingly busy day. today (tuesda) and thursday i'll be the guest speaker at iscf, then wed have drama practice, and fri youth are hosting a valentines banquet for the urkrain missions trip fundraiser.

God's been so awsome in my life lately and has been helpign me to slow down, see life fro ma different point of view, and just helpign me to breath and i'm so pumped for what the future holds

i should be getting some sleep b/ have to work late tomorrow...l8er!

At long last, I update my life.

 

So much has happened, but I shall focus on my life as of this moment.

 

While trolling thru many multiple scholarships on a database, I have found that there are very many scholarships for writing.  Particularly sci fi. All of which I am applying for.  One is a book deal, which would definitely pay for my college in its entireity. Or so I hope.  If  I get it.   If I just get one, or even a few, that would be a major help. 

 

Now, to get writing....  

ok well I graduated Saturday and now i'm in ohio it is so frickin awesome here i'm gettin to see my family and i'm stayin at my aunts she lives on a huge party street and she has a pool in her back yard so i'm kinda sunburnt but it's all good cuz I had to swim cuz it's been so frickin hot here.. and Eric is moving back to Bristol Friday and i'll be back in Bristol about a week after that....

Sorry I haven't posted anything lately. I received a phone call from my mom at around a quarter after 8 Friday morning. My grandpa had passed away. So I had to throw things together, shower, and leave for home. My dad, his brothers, and my grandma are doing their best, but they're taking it pretty hard. The funeral, well, actually, it was more of a celebration of my grandpa's life and the knowledge that we know we'll see him again some day in Heaven, was yesterday morning. I just stopped by the community college here at home to check e-mail and give an update while I was here to pick up my sister. It's hard and I'm going to miss him a lot. And I love him. I just wanted to think everyone who had kept me and my grandpa/family in your thoughts and prayers. It was appreciated more than you'll know.

 

Now I have to go get my sister and go home and pack up to head back to school this afternoon/evening. And I have a midterm tomorrow.

 

Life goes on . . .