Life Is Good @ MindSay

Today, I am delighted to be living in a mythical land

 where
The sun is shining
The air is breezy and pleasant
I have food in my stomach
     clothes on my person that fit
         a job waiting for me
               time before my next class to rest my brain
                      hurts-so-good ache in my quads from yesterday's workout
My car has very little maintenance needed at present
The Current went straight from Beach Boys to Arcade Fire this morning
My job allows to wear the four different bits of metal I like on my left ear
I have comfy shoes (you don't realize how big a deal this is until you've had uncomfy shoes)
I'll get to see the other half of a friendship that's been growing stronger weekly
My Dad and I got to laugh about our iron filter this morning (you had to be there)
I have a source of income once again
I have a muffin waiting for me for lunch
I got to see Swedewolf yesterday (he's leaving Saturday, and won't be back 'til Christmas).
Swedewolf, during our lunchtime conversation, labeled me both motherly and charismatic. I had no idea.
I get to play with the Jazz Band for the first time tonight
And hey, again, I get to see Sport. I'm excited for this.
If the weather holds, I may get to go rollerblading tomorrow. I am excited. My quads are crying, but, meh, they're strong, they can take it.
My bedhead this morning was kind of wildly cute, instead of scary.
And I am in this mythical land that exists on the other side of 9 HOURS OF SLEEP!! Yeah!

A blog by Katherine Wright Desai, Ph.D. caught my attention today.
( I've only recently come across Katherine's work and enjoy her perspective. )

Living Your Joy Filled Life

What do you see around you that brings you back to yourself and your joy? What reminds you that Life is meant to be joyful? Whatever the little triggers and messages, hints and nudges - watch for them and encourage them in your day to day experiences! When you see or hear them -  let them remind you of your own joy and to bring it out and let your joy shine. It might be a bird's song, the unbridled laughter of a child, a butterfly landing near you. Perhaps the lyrics of a favorite song, a smile from a stranger or maybe even just some of the new slang words in pop culture like Sweet and Juicy and Ease. Even in marketing; "Life Is Good" has become a popular slogan. The Discovery Channel has a similar promotion with an uplifting, positive message about loving life on planet earth.

I might be a bit prejudiced toward these messages and nudges; it's the main focus of my on-line work where-ever I pop up on a search. Encouraging people to watch for the magic in their own lives, seeing how little choices can make big differences, celebrating nature and our natural world. Even celebrating the human spirit immersed within it all! It has been my passion to find ways to capture magical little moments in words or photographs when possible and share them through blogs, a website, and a variety of on-line social sharing formats (I've triedFacebook, Twitter, Flickr, Picassa, Photobucket, YouTube, Lulu, Clipmarks , Care2). I've never thought much about what I was doing, rather I seemed driven to learn how and to explore a wide range of computer applications to make it happen.

Over the years the greatest benefit for me has been the ability to see beyond all the bad news, strife and grief that permeates our society. It doesn't make me ignore it or enjoy it - don't get me wrong. Simply, I can also see that there are beautiful aspects to our world as well. There are heroes of all walks of life. There are courageous and generous people in every country in the world. There are lovers and children and grandparents. There are birds and fish, flowers and trees; there are incredible sunsets and there is unmatchable beauty and it is right here in this very same world where some people have lost sight of their joy and have chosen to focus on war and anger and pain.

There comes a time in life when you have to let go of all the pointless drama and the people who create it and surround yourself with people who make you laugh so hard that you forget the bad and focus solely on the good. After all, life is too short to be anything but happy.

My best friend of 8 years crushed me a few months ago.We were inseparable. She was my advisor and the person who kept me grounded.For years i told the world how wonderful she was to me. Her two boys are my God sons. they call me Auntie Tracia. So you can imagine how i felt when i found out just how good of a friend she was to me.

She has had a hard life. The father of her oldest son left her when she became pregnant and the dad of the second has a woman in every part of Jamaica. I tried encouraging her to be independent and live for her sons instead of men but she couldn't understand. She has a obsessive personality when it comes to relationships. Raiding phones for numbers, calling other women and so on.I completely understand how she feels. it is not easy to not have someone to go through life with when you have two kids to think about, its even worst when for the second time the dad of the child loses interest. being a friend to both him and her i was placed in the middle constantly. She has it in her head that they are a couple and he constantly tells her that he doesn't want her.

To make along story short. When she and i met i was in a very bad relationship so i guess she felt good about that. after all, we were in the same boat. I don't have any kids yet but i was strongly in love with someone that used me every chance he gets. Their are some "friends" that like being friends with you because you are no better of than they are.

I finally came to my sense and left that relationship and was single for two long years. i needed time to heal. Two years ago i met Derrick. He is the most wonderful man i've ever met. We fell in love, hard and have been going strong ever since. we are buying a home together now, opening a business and getting married and starting a family soon. I guess by now you realise that my very dear and best friend of 8 years is finding all sorts of problems with us. "i don't spend enough time with her, i'm always busy" mind you i see her almost everyday. It got to a point where she started spreading rumors on me. I still tried with her as much as i could. Derrick keeps telling me she is not a good person because she has tried to sway his mind from me but i refused to believe my friend was in all rights, a fiend.

About two months ago she sent me a text saying that she don't ever want to speak to me again becasue i was never a good friend to her and i don't see her anymore. this is someone i gave my last to at all times. When she had no where to go i moved her into my home for almost a year expenses free. I couldn't believe what i was reading. I texted her back. NO PROBLEM. Months passed and i didn't call, text , see or even think about calling her. i was so hurt. when she realized i wasn't showing any interest she told a mutual friend of ours that as soon as Derrick leaves me, which he will, i will come running back to her. I called her and let her have it then. Now she keeps calling and texting me trying to patch things up. I'm i wrong for wanting nothing to do with her? How can people you've known for so long turn around to be your worst enemy? One things for sure, i'm never trusting or investing my time in any more friendships the way i did with her. It's not worth it.

Howdy Howdy all!

I know, I know it has been forever since you heard from yours truly and for that I am sorry. I will say that I have missed blogging a little. I really miss reading everyone's thoughts and such the most. I have been in-cog-Negro (yes I still think that is funny Myclette ) because I have been working some crazy lovely hours at the Bookstore as the Merchandise Manager and let me tell you the book signings alone are enough to make you rip out your hair. The authors range from extremely nice and independent (they come equipped and ready to sell their books rather than just sitting there waiting for people to spontaneously become interested in their take on the great American novel) to the lousy ones who are so dull that people pass by their table and nod off unexpectedly or they are so abrupt that folks literally block their faces in anticipation of a slap.

Anyway, since my readership has dwindled due to my own absentia I suppose I am more free to just write without constraint.
It was not my intention to take such a long hiatus but life outside of these cyber-walls beckoned and I had no choice but to answer the call.
My dream of living the writing life is being realized and I have been spending countless hours of my life submerged in that reality.
The good news is that with all of the work and research and sweat that comes with that life I still know unequivocally and without a doubt that it is the life I want.
Better news is that the shell I wore for so long has dissolved under the solvent of my new existence.
Contentment is a hard word for me to use in connection with my life sometimes. Not only because it seems so elusive sometimes (what with me feeling as though I never have enough of what I want) but because it signals the apex or phoenix of good things, good times and good people to come. So no I wont say that I am content in the sense that I have all that I want or need. I will say that swimming through my own psyche and acknowledging who I am has brought me a measure of spiritual and emotional contentment. For that I have to be eternally grateful to the world around me that has allowed me to slow down and find myself in the great big show that is ME.
I know this may seem like a bunch of mumbo-jumbo to some but to others it will be a mirror of their own thoughts and emotions.
So here I am, a published writer (short stories in small magazines right now but keep your eyes peeled for the Sovereign Chronicles), a good person with big heart and honest nature; a flawed individual, unafraid to admit the wrongs I have done and the people I have hurt. In turn I have forgiven a number of people who have hurt me. I can honestly say that I have let it all go.
Dont get me wrong I committed some acts of revenge in the beginning and oh how those acts will affect those people! I am not proud of my behavior and I wont even say that I wish I had not done it. I will say that I wish I had been a better person then and better equipped to deal with what had been dealt to me, but at the time I most assuredly wasn't. So I took a break and looked completely at who I used to be and who I had become and here I am.
But ultimately I didn't compromise my morals, I stayed true to those I committed myself to and most importantly I did not Settle for what I thought was the best I could do--thinking back now I cant even remotely believe that I was going to stop where I was now that I am here...whew! Talk about dodging bullets!
Anyway I am going to be back to writing my healthy living nonsense over here at The House of Environgirl and giving my 2 cents on the ways of the world and for anyone who stumbles over here I would like to say that you are welcome and if you say howdy I will most certainly say howdy back!
Be safe be true and honor your commitments, Karma will let you know what they are!
Goddess Bless

Freshman year of college, one of the most enjoyable things most of the guys in our dorm discovered (the straight guys anyways) was the absurdly fun network multi-player shooting games, such as half-life.  Such a good game, and I was damn good at it too, to the point where people would play under a name similar to mine because you could cut their jealousy with a damned knife. 
You know what else has a half-life?  My handwriting.  It is so goddamn hard to read what I have written a few months after the fact.  I stumbled across a note I had written myself a few years ago, and seeing as how what I had seen is now lost on me, I could barely make out the point I was trying to get across to myself.  This is understandable, because most of the time I don't make any sense, regardless of the situation.  However, the fact that the subject wasn't fresh in my mind made my handwriting all the more impossible.  If I wrote something two weeks ago, I would still have a notion of what it was about, with the handwriting just jogging my memory of what I was thinking, not so much as telling me.  This is not entirely bad, as words are just agreed upon descriptions of various things and ideas.  However, my writing itself has a half-life, it is not eternal, because the farther I get away from the point of writing, the less I can make out what the hell I was thinking or trying to say.  Also, when writing off the cuff, I find that it is easier for me to do so with a pen and paper, as the words flow better, I am taking my time a bit more, and things tend to be concise and better developed.  With typing I jump all over the place, rush thoughts, and generally don't make sense.  But at least you can read what the hell I wrote a few months later.