Jail @ MindSay

So, today was ridiculous. It started when I went down the hall to get the kids, and Z came running down the hall. Apparently E was running by, but I didn’t see him. Anyway, I told Z that we don’t do that, and he started cursing up a storm; the only way to describe the face of the little kids who were there with us was sheer terror. Anyway, so there’s cursing, and then there was him slamming his boots bag into my crotch, and then kicking me, and throwing his bookbag at me. I had to get Larry, who got him to walk down, but I told C that Z had to go to the t.o. room. We told him, and he wasn’t thrilled, but he went in voluntarily.  Wanted to come out during the movie’s ending, but we decided that was a no. Claudia went in to sit with him.
So at about this time, Robin walks in with A. I guess I looked at his face, so she tells me that this weekend he was out of control, and that she had to grab him by the face to get him back to her. I was uncomfortable with the mark, so I told Claudia, who told me to go tell Jackie. I went to Jackie, who told me to bring A down. It took some time, but I got him down. We tried to get him to talk about it, but he wouldn’t. He said mom had hurt his feelings, but she didn’t hurt his body (though she’d admitted to me she had). Then he said something along the lines of, “if I tell mom will get in trouble and go to jail” so clearly, this has been told to him before.
D made threats at A who was annoying him, lost is safe body, and then lost it further by messing with furniture and then leaving the room. OY. Rest of morning wasn’t too incident-y; Z was allowed to go to art with Parker, and then we all went to the caf. We talked to Jackie because while C was in the room with a calm Z, he had thrown books at her and stomped on her foot quite a bit. She said that if he was calm now, we couldn’t send him home because then it sent a bad message. Dammit. Tomorrow, I guess. First thing he does as assault.
I had a meeting with Kate during Erin’s reading time, and then went to Erin’s meeting for a bit. Came back to SS which took some prompting but I got Z and then A to do it (E and D were in T.O. having already done it and doing read aloud). Recess Z and I were outside, and A had been picked up early. Science was…rough start. E had HAD it with Z, didn’t want to hear about Science since it was solid/liq/gas and he ‘knew that already’, and some other stuff. Then Z started being unsafe w/ pencil, so C and P got that away, but he kicked her, so we got him to the t.o. room and it again took a while for him to calm down. He’s escalating.

i'm pretty exausted right now. my brother keeps going into and getting out of jail every week and i can't take it. when he's gone,i'm so fucking happy, on cloud nine, but then he comes home again and i fall a million miles. i go from my very best where i can laugh at anything and i don't worry about anything, but i and up as a zombie and i yell at my friends when they don't do anything and i can sleep for over 12 hours every day because i can't stand being awake. my emotions can't take it. i'm just lucky my friends understand and they don't get offended. 

i've seen the school counselor and she just tells me to love my brother because he's my family and she doesn't try to give any help or advice, but she told me that if i hurt myself she'll tell on me and she said she'd be checkng on me because she's worried. so if i avoid her she'll think i'm doing something. i've been trying really hard not to, though.

My uncles dog died yesterday. He really loved that dog and seems a bit lost without him. We all loved the dog but not as much as he. He also says that when my grandmother dies he will go back to jail. I would appreciate it if you would pray for him. That he will find salvation and be ok. And the same for the rest of use as well.

And please pray for Rs son...he is in jail again. And likely to stay there for a bit. Please pray that he will be granted a bit of wisdom and maturity through this.

And for all those folks in the flood areas too. I have some game friends up there and I don't know if they are ok or not yet. I hope so. And I guess we all need prayers for the food prices now days.

I guess thats it for now. I'm feeling a bit sad and not entirely myself. More later probably. Take care.