Inspired By Conflict @ MindSay 
Hey, here I am again. I noticed that both Mario and Hoz have been putting in more than their usual amount of posts lately and I want to complete the trifecta (or shamelessly try to include myself in something without being invited. potato, potahto). To catch you up on the last few months it's 2007, Mario has a baby, someone else is now expecting (secret?), and I am inspired to jump on that bus. What.? At this rate by the time I get married and have a kid these other two will be in their 7th year of college, so I asked Katie if she would mother my child. She agreed and with that one fell swoop I will both give my mother the grandchild she won't shut the hell up about and ensure my kid will have a few friends around to describe to him what far away objects look like (see, I'm a good father already).
To continue Tanner and I took a small tour of southern New England and surrounding state this past weekend. Not only was it fun but I got to wear my wristbands and now I feel inspired to go somewhere else. Yup, I wrote that. If there's a free place to stay why not? I'd put up any of my friends from out of town (or persuade my parents too, rather) so I figure it's time to impose on you, even if you haven't yet on me (ahem, my parents). Next stop . . . who knows but I'm sure I won't have a problem finding someone to come along. And I'll probably use your soap. Sorry, but that's the last thing I ever, or ever will, think to pack.
Inspiration. That is my theme this evening. And it was all inspired by an away message I wrote, "Do I need to be more proactive?" At first it was just something I wrote, few of my away messages have any inherent meaning and this one is (or was, depending on when you read this post) no exception. I've tried it a few times in the past, being proactive, but usually only when I felt very strongly about something. The little things were pretty hit or miss. I'd usually rather be not cleaning my room or at the bar. But then, while showering, "Do I need to be more proactive?" got me thinking. I'm not usually one to take initiative and do new things, right? So what if I were? . . . That's it. Did you expect something more profound?
And with that I'm feeling inspired to sleep.
Leave a comment.
Inspired to do what? Inspired to do next to nothing.
....
That's right. And tomorrow I am going to take that retarded performance test for trombone because I cannot handle concert band music on this crummy flute I have to fix in the middle of playing. And I am so scared because I don't know... I feel so dumb lately. I found out that I have a 21% chance of getting into the college I really truly want to. I mean, getting into this college means moving away from everything and going to Utah or staying here for family visits at least four times a year. With my crummy luck and crappy performance this marking period, I better start packing my bags for Utah... I doubt I will get accepted.
My father said that now is the difference between--not getting into college--but the one I want.
I don't know why but I just can't keep up in Spanish class... and I think I'm going to flip. I used to do so good. And now I can barely understand what in the world is going on around me.
So that's how it's going for me right now.
I hope the PSATs are available in the spring.
I have learned that at least one of my "major" life lessons is about setting limits and understanding that I may set limits, as a matter of fact, that it is necessary to set limits. That I needn't allow into my experience, that which is not of a vibration that is comfortable to me. Doesn't matter what that might be, just that I do have the responsibility to myself to ensure my own "comfort zone".
My "sixth" senses have developed much this summer and my ability to practice discernment when approaching my day to day experiences is improving exponentially, that's where a "gift" appeared, embedded within a confrontation I experienced just recently. I call it a gift because the learning experience is something I will truly benefit from as I have a great reminder now that will make me ask the question when I am experiencing a vibrational dis-harmony; "does this serve a purpose?" Using my intuitive senses of discernment to "check" the vibrations of a situation and determine if it's an "energy" or "frequency" with which I choose to participate and to know it is okay to choose not to participate if that frequency is not comfortable.
The refinement of my intuitive abilities and a new creative streak in a form some people might call "channeling" has been the focus of my summer and there is something to be said for learning to get used to these feelings and sensations...it is awkward...similar to a baby learning to walk...I know it's possible. I know I can do it and I do feel quite wobbly, yet, in this new experience!
Having reached this "point" I began to ponder the concept and purpose of dialogue, in particular how it relates to design and idea development. What came to mind when I asked myself the question; "what do people expect with regard to entering into a dialogue?" may be of interest, and so I will share;
While each and everyone of us are entitled to our own opinions there is a "place of interchange" called dialogue where we humans attempt to express our ideas and in some cases even attempt to combine and refine concepts together until the subject being discussed or "worked on" comes to a concensus...
In my past experiences in design work I found this process fascinating as it can seem to take on a life of its own. When there are solutions or answers to questions sought in the design process much effort will be placed in "kicking the can around"... Any designer is familiar with that concept. In other words through dialogue between the designers and whoever else is on the team all aspects are hashed out and observed with an eye to reaching a conclusion or solution.
Sometimes this dialogue can become heated as various arguments will be presented for and against specific aspects of "what's going on" or "what can be accomplished". This is all part of the dynamics of the process and is a beautiful dance of individuals and ideas in flux and flow. Designers and people in general all have egos and they are best left outside the design lab or dialogue format if an honest assessment is desired. Ego can taint the mix and upset the dynamics, stopping up the process like a clogged drain! The result at best will leave a "good" idea in the wings and at worst will result in having to restart the entire process.
It seems to me ideas aren't really something we "own" per se...where do they come from - the ethers...some "insight", what have you? Ideas are something that run through us like a brook through a meadow...often many people get the same or similar ideas about things. So the one who registers a patent first - because we are so bent on ownership in our western culture - gets to "claim" some prize, money, fame, etc. etc.. Meanwhile six (arbitrary number) other people had similar ideas and simply never followed through with them. Not that it matters, it seems to me the ownership issue interferes with the process some.
It would be interesting to consider how things would have developed here in North America if those who would "impose their rule" and force the laws of other countries (our ancestors!) onto this fair land had chosen to learn from those who already resided there and contributed to their experiences...for the land knew no "ownership" previous to the arrival of the Vikings and Columbus... If you can imagine for just a moment how much better off democracy could have been if it had been enacted without all the fighting and hatred and mistrust and obvious disregard for other beings that occurred in the births of both the United States and Canada!
Currently there is a drama unfolding in Iraq, the birthing of a new aspect of citizenship and democracy in a nation where this concept seems desirable in design to some and threatens the notions of others who wish to avoid change. My heart goes out to those people! Putting aside the why's and wherefor's of who's there militarily or why they went or if it's good or bad...we cannot reverse what has already been done. We can move forward and all people can be well served to encourage the Iraqi people to stay with the process, to not give up and to be willing to give a little in return for getting a little. Hopefully they have learned from our own mistakes and with patience and persistence they will look back proudly on the effort they have made to re-create themselves!
The future can appear much brighter than some may be in the habit of believing!
It is ours to create and as we all "kick that can around" may we work together co-operatively to create a future we are all proud to be a part of!