Hugs @ MindSay 
love
Memorial Day is soon upon us, and as you may imagine, it has a fresh & heightened significance to our family this year. With this in mind, this book caught my eye ... and heart. It is a story about a child whose father is being deployed. The boy wishes to give his father something of himself to make the separation more tolerable, so he traces his hands, measures the distance from one hand to his other hand and cuts a piece of yarn that length. He sees it as a "paper hug." Anytime his Dad feels lonely, he just has to wrap the paper hug around himself and feel his son's love.
The child center where I work has agreed to share this project. We are making paper hugs and sending them to a unit about to deploy ... to any soldier who wants one, as many as we can make.
I am of course talking about the need for spiritual enlightenment! The need for a mass global collective consciousness. Peace is at our fingertips, yet it seems so hopelessly far away sometimes, doesn't it? Such an idea should, one would think, be universally welcomed and accepted. Shouldn't everyone be trying to live with the best of intentions and the warmest of hearts in an attempt to create that idealistic Utopia? That state of Shambhala? Life, as we know it, could be exponentially better!!! Our health, our homes, our relationships (intimate or not) and generally our overall happiness could be the best we would have ever known. A shift in mindset could see the development of impoverish nations, the feeding of every hungry belly, the adoption of cultural beliefs into other cultures and so forth.
Now I am definitely not the most spiritually inclined, nor am I the most positive of people at times, but as an individual, I have begun to devote myself to following a healthy spiritual lifestyle. I am most assuredly not religious in any way, so I searched for something else to fulfill that void I was feeling. I have met many many wonderful amazing people and through these people I discovered a whole world right in front of me! It's the same world you and I both live in , the same people are around me, but it is 100% different. It is a world based entirely on love and energy. A close friend, who calls himself the "Love Activist" taught me the most important thing I have ever learned to this date. No matter who we are, where we are from, what we believe or don't believe in, we all have the capability to do one universal thing. LOVE. Yes, that's it. It really is as simple as that, though I never before would have guessed it. Love is something we are born with and blessed with. With enough love, we can conquer all trials and tribulations. We can eliminate greed, and fear for with love, we need nothing else but each other. With enough love, everyone will be taken care of because that's what love ensures.
Life is hard, make no mistake about that. But with the beauty of such things as Synchronicity and Manifestation, we can start to see how our choices affect our paths, and how our thoughts are one of the most powerful tools we have. Our intentions that we set can determine our successes, our thoughts can forge a path through anything. By connecting ourselves to the beauty in everything, and embracing the feeling of love we can begin a progressive and powerful change in our lives. It will not happen overnight, and will not happen if we don't open our eyes to the truth many people have not yet been introduced to. But with time and patience, we can overcome the dramas of today, the genocides, the wars and the famines.
So educate yourselves! Pick up Celestine Prophecy, or watch The Secret. Learn the Sedona Method, learn to meditate or simply talk with those around you who may have reacher a higher spiritual frequency. There are many others like myself who know a tonne more than I do at this point. But what I do know is that the time for change is now, and that it is our movement that will encourage others to follow suite!
As Bob Marley once said, "Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery, None but ourselves can free our minds."
Dixie currently feels:
Thirsty 
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I really hate that smiley right now.
I would kill for an extra large glass of smooth, creamy Pepsi...
...We have about 1/6 of a 2 litre bottle of Coca-Cola downstairs.
My famished throat is screaming out for carbonated sugar.
I'm in a really bad mood today.
For starters, it's a Friday.
I'm always knackered on a Friday morning, and I can never wake up.
I didn't have any clean shirts, because I'd forgotten to wash them - so I had to wear one from earlier, which I sprayed under the pits with perfume.
My rucksack ended up immense once again - but today, it was bigger than ever before.
My rucksack has three compartments.
- Front section
- Middle section
- Back section
The front section is the smallest, and that's where I keep my school planner, my USB stick, my keys, and SR - if he's travelling with me that day.
The middle section is for coursework and textbooks. It's also where I keep both of my pencil cases and my art folders and English files.
The back section is where my lunchbox goes - my hooded jacket, if I was wearing it - and my PE kit, if it's a Friday or a Wednesday.
Seeing as how it WAS a Friday, I had to walk the full way to school, with my black Converse in the back section pressing on my lunchbox - and having a corner of a sharp tuppaware box digging in my spine.
Not fun.
...I've just remembered.
I took a quid this morning to get myself some junk food from the paper shop on the way up.
I bought two bars of 15p Cadbury's chocolate - which I break into three small strips and munch before we even get out onto the main road - Normanby Road.
I also bought myself a 50p can of fizzy Vimto - and if I'm not mistaken... It's still in the front section?
Aaaah...
Yes it is. 
It's not even that warm, considering it's been inside my bag all day.
Okay so...
First period was ICT - which flew by.
We're making fictional companies and databases on Microsoft Access to go with them.
I've made a stock sheet, a customer list, and a bookings list - because it's a holiday company.
Today I made the stock sheet, and I was just writing down all these foods and drinks that came to mind.
Alcoholic drinks and gourmet food, mainly.
Oh, and some spa treatment stuff - like body butter and massage oil from the "Lush Spa Services Suppliers".
Second period was PE - in which I did nothing.
I'm well known in our year at being an expert on sexual slang and sexual things.
I honestly don't know why either.
I've never once had sex, hetrosexual or homosexual - but, I read.
I read websites, I read blogs and articles, - I find out thinks that nobody else will ever think I'll know.
So Mel asked me what a "slobberdash" and a "donkey punch" was.
Of course, I defined them both instantly.
Her boyfriend sounds like a right sort... Jeeeeeeeez.
At break, Carl had a packet of Bourbon Creams and he shared them with Sam, David, Thomas and I.
I took one, and it was nice.
I prefer Custard Creams to Bourbon Creams, but. A free biscuit is always nice.
Third lesson - Science.
All we were doing was balancing equations all lesson.
Fine, don't get me wrong - I'm a straight A in Science.
But there's only SO many times I can write:
"2Na (s) + 2H2O (l) ---- 2NaOH (aq) + H2 (g)"
Okay, so sorry for incorporating CHEMISTRY into my blog.
Please forgive me.
Fourth lesson was Music.
Last term, we all did solo performances on whatever instrument we play - and we were filmed.
It truly is humiliating, watching yourself sat at a keyboard, trembling - playing everything right - but looking like you're about to faint.
I've never been a good performer.
During lunch break, I went to the library as normal - everyone was arranging flowers.
Our librarian likes to liven things up a bit by organising strange things for everyone to do.
I didn't feel like arranging flowers - I'd had enough of that when I went for my week's work experience in Parkfield Florists in Eston.
Honestly - they made me condition SO MANY flowers - with no gloves.
After you've de-thorned your tenth rose - WITH YOUR BARE HANDS - you'd be quite annoyed too.
Last lesson was English - and we read another two chapters of "To Kill A Mockingbird."
I was made to read it in year eight - and I despised it.
For some reason, I now love it.
We're watching the 1960's black and white film too.
It's quite good, exactly how I imagined Maycomb County actually looking - but Mary Badham, who plays Scout - who was ten at the time (I looked that up too. 
) - has the most annoying squeakiest voice in the universe that REALLY grinds on you.
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Aww, I don't have any more Vimto.
And I'm STILL thirsty!
ARGH.
In the library after school I felt sad.
I sat down beside the photocopier and had a little cry to myself.
Then I put my glasses back on and walked over to where Claire was - sat talking to my learning mentor/miniature counsellor, Julia Parry; only I just call her Parry.
Claire was facing away from me, so I put my arms around her back and rested my cheek on her shoulder.
She got annoyed with me when I was breathing hard on her back.
I've done it before - if you breathe heavily through fabric, it really burns the skin underneath.
So Claire was snapping at me, saying it was too hot - to get off her.
That made me sad.
I don't like to annoy people who I like.
I stopped breathing on her and I cried on her right shoulder.
I didn't make a great deal of noise, other than the occassional sniff - but, Claire seems to be rather sensetive to anything - she could feel my tears absorbing into her jumper.
"You better not be crying on me."
- Claire goes.
It didn't sound threatening, but more of a concerned tone.
I stopped after a while.
Claire wanted to remove her purple hair extension today.
She held her hair back at the side and asked me to pull it out.
I didn't want to hurt her, so I pulled it gently.
She still winced, though.
I've kept a bit of her hair.
I put it inside a clear plastic wallet inside my artwork ringbinder.
Claire's hair is like a burgundy-purple-brown.
It's a bit odd, but it suits her.
I got to watch Claire, Sammie and Ashleigh all running like loonies down Normanby Road for the 64 bus to Grangetown.
Now imagine this - Claire is really small, she's a few inches smaller than me - and her electric guitar she carries on her back is almost as big as she is.
So imagine her with the guitar, with files and music books in the front pouch, a bag over her shoulder, and a mini guitar amp in her left hand - RUNNING for a bus.
Miraan and I laughed - she stopped and put two fingers up at us.
She knew how silly she looked though, bless her - she can't really blame us for having a little giggle about it.
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There's a building site around the corner from my house.
They're knocking down old, deralict housing.
It was raining and windy as I walked past the cranes and demolition lorries.
I was trying to hold my breath - I have asthma, so it's difficult to breathe when I walk down that road.
They're always burning something in an oil drum, or there's brick dust flying about - there's always something. It's been that way every morning and every afternoon since Monday.
So, there was a crane lifting a huge load of rubble into the back of one of the lorries.
As I became paralell with it - the wind blew directly in my direction - JUST as the crane released its load.
So I was instantly bombarded with a cloud of brick dust - which covered me entirely, coating my face, sticking in my hair, clinging to my clothes.
I coughed, as I'd inhaled some - and a lot of it had blown past my glasses and gone into my eyes.
So I couldn't see, I couldn't breathe - I was being pelted with dust, rain, wind, grit - everything.
As I turned the corner, out of harm's way - I tried to wipe away some of the dust from my eyes.
I got inside - drenched from the rain - clods of dirt and grit all lodged within my hair.
My uniform is also black - black jumper, black trousers, black Doctor Martens. - Everything was covered in brown dirt and red brick dust.
I sat down on our white cream sofa and grimaced as I wiped my face.
All the dust seemed to have glued itself to my wet skin - entwined in my eyebrows, collecting in the creases of my face - like beside my nose - and there were even grains of it stuck inside my ears.
We're looking after my mam's friend's dog - Gina - whilst they're in India.
Gina barked at me, waving her tail in my dirty face - wanting to be taken out.
I growled and snapped at her - telling her to go away, it was too cold, it was raining.
She wouldn't leave me alone, so I put her lead on and let her out the back alley gate onto the field behind our house.
She took her whizz and then spent the next five minutes sniffing the fenceposts.
Her legs were shaking when I took her back inside.
I think she might be afraid of all the demolition noise outside.
I was tired after that, and I was asleep on the sofa - next to my mam - when she came home, that is.
I came up here at about half six, and fell asleep on my bed.
I woke up at about ten. I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight.
Not for a while, anyway.
I need to clean up my room.
A shower would be a good idea too, to get rid of the rest of this brick dust.
I heated up a can of meatballs in gravy after I'd brought Gina back in.
I ate them between two white bread baps.
Sort of like meatball sloppy joes.
You only get fourteen in a can. I'm still hungry.
I really want to eat one of those frozen pizzas, but is it too late?
Oh, the dilemmas of life.
lol I didn't tell her about Ira (after all, I could totally see her letting it slip and saying something about him to me while I'm in drawing or something and he's around) but I did tell her about the issues I've been having with Ryan and how Cory has been acting. She seriously wondered if I'd never date Cory.
Funny how people don't get that sometimes I don't like people....I just find it fun to mess with them. No, I am not a tease.
People at Subway are beging retarded. So are the customers. Oh my gosh, I was seriously ready to kill about half of the people who walked through the door. One woman was super snotty when I asked her about her veggies and was like "I want it the same way as the other one!" at which point I had to clarify to her that I had not made her previous sandwich. I had just come onto my shift and the MALE to my left had been the one who had made her sandwich. Had her head not been so far up her ass she might have made that connection without my assistance. So, yeah...If I could work at Girls Inc. I totally would. At least I could deal with people I relatively like and not these morons who don't appreciate what you do for them. I mean jeez, on one had you've got customers bitching about this that and the other whereas on the other hand you have little girls hugging you and saying they love you. Yeaaah seems like and easy enough decision to me. Damn my lack of wheels, though. Never the less, Subway days may be coming to an end soon. I'm beging to remember my reasons for quitting the first time around.
Don't get me wrong, I don't believe in signs. But if I did, wouldn't you say that me being in one car and a potentical love-interest randomly being in a car beside me and me turning one way and him turning the other would be a horrible sign?...or that after weeks of searching high and low for citrus tic tacs (which have a certain connection to someone), my mom suddenly sees some at a grocery store we frequent and buys them for me just when I've given up hope (hope for someone, not for tic tacs)?...luckily, I don't believe in signs...
Oooh, also, Ira played some freakin' awesome music in class on Tuesday. Stuff by Andrew Bird as well as The Boy Least Likely To. I've become entirely addicted to the latter, and cannot wait for some cash to grace my palm so I can snag one of their cds. Here's one of their music videos:
Sorry for not blogging earlier, i know some of you have been anxious to know how my first few days were but ive been busy with so many things that I havent gotten the time. So anyways i guess ill start from the top...
The first day was quite insane I must say. On the first day i found out that one of my best friends (of which ive known for 10 years) is moving down to Dallas, Texes within 2-4 months:( I also found out that day that the guy I like is "in love" with another girl and went on a date with her:( However, that day I met a guy that was errily similar to be in many ways. For example, we both had 2 older brothers, our birthdays were 8 days apart, we both get ridiculoed all the time...etc. Point is I was going to date him, but by the second day I could see that his "honesty" was a bit more than honesty..he ended off telling off a kid that i knew was a drug dealer, just because he asked one of my friends for a smoke (im not getting into much more detail besides that). It was for that reason (and because I'm still getting adjusted to my new classes, im still trying to get over the guy I like, and Im really upset about on of my best friends moving:() I'm not dating him, and I feel bad that I had to make that kid's first week of school so shitty, but hey what can I do? I guess I just gotta learn not to jump into relationships after 1 day of meeting someone:| It really makes me look desperate, but in my defence I thought i did like him the first day..but w/e its all in the past now...
Anyways besides the drama of going back to school and talking to people, there has been some good. The first day going back all the people I hung out last year in the tech wing (i probably not have mentioned most of them before: Mikko(aka Shugo), Michelle, Sam, Sean, Ryan D, Ryan W, Jordan, Deirdre...) were all glad to see me and i recieved a lot of hugs:P It really suprised me and made me feel sad though that I had forgoten about them and forgotten what great friends they were. I hope I never do that again
But anyways, I havent said much about my classes. My schedule is:
Semetser 1
Period 1: Science (Acedemic)
Period 2: Civics/Carrer Studies (Open course)
Period 3: Lunch
Period 4: History (Acedemic)
Period 5: Gym (open girls course)
Semester 2
Period 1: Foods (open course)
Period 2: Math (advanced placement)
Period 3: Lunch
Period 4: English (advanced placement)
Period 5: Dance (open course)
Taken that into account, my schedule couldn't be more well-balanced. To most people, 2nd semester would seem like the "harder" semster for me, but to me semster 1 is and im actually glad its like that. I always tend to work harder semester 1, and because i have more classes this semster that you regularily get homework in, i should be more succesful than if i had more "harder" courses next semster. Sure I have those two advanced placement courses 2nd semester, but each course I have next semeter are all really intersesting and fun classes to me, so its all good:) Im not saying though that my classes this semester arent interesting, but im saying that ther just not as interesting as others could be.
Anyways I am babbling. Im not sure when ill blog next, but it seems to me that ill probably be blogging 1ce a week or so..at least thats the pattern that it's going at now. So anywyas byebye for now.
-:)Kristal:(
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