High School Friends @ MindSay

Desperation
There's danger in frustration
Complicated words slipping off of your tongue

and ain't one of them the truth
I'm still desperate for you

You were too caught up in giving too much up

and not doing what you should have been

I spent until 2am last night talking to Jason.  It was like a major healing thing for me.  Because we talked about old memories and how much our high school sucked cause everyone in our graduating class pretty much sucked. and he told me how he remembers when my twin was in a coma and in Biology i cried my eyes out and ran out of the class. i was like wow, you remember that? Talked about the crappy friends I use to have and Jason told me they all still act like they did in 8th grade. hahaha.  It was great for me because things of my past I dont talk about especially the ones that cut me skin deep and having Jason there to talk about things that happened, was a major healing process for me.  Cause the only way to start healing is by start talking about it.

A good friend from mindsay actually IMed me last night too.  I dont know if i can say the name so i'll keep it annoymous. but It was great having that conversation and letting all my fusterations with Ryan out and having someone there to listen and encourage me and give me a little faith that it'll all be okay by giving it time. Thanks a lot by the way.  Most of my friends just yell at me 24/7 about it.  Except Heather.  She actually asks me how i'm doing and dealing with that cause she said she knows how much I liked him even though at the same time she really wants me to date her brother.

On a different note, since the tornado came yesterday and a severe thunderstorm, a tree fell and split a house into 2 and it fell on a guy that was outside and he died.

Jason: thats what ppl did a lot at our school. like when someone would die the entire school was suddenly best friends with the person

So the whole "do something productive" plan did not happen. I ended up watching a movie and then going out with my aformention friend. We went downtown and to the Cereal Bar for coffee which was fun and turned out to be fairly interesting. We ran into some old friends that we hadn't seen in awhile and it was good to catch up with them. It seems like when you really connect with someone then that connection is never broken and no matter how long you two go without speaking, everything seems back to normal once you see each other again. I like that alot and I hope it holds true for all of my friends from high school. Tonight got me to thinking about how much I will miss everyone that I see at school. Also, about how I take seeing my friends, and even people who I am only just aquainted with, for granted. Like this one girl who has a locker near mine. I don't know her name and after school I will probably never see her again... Maybe I should use the remainder of the semester to get to know everyone better so that I don't miss out on making friends with some potentially cool people... Hmm.

     Hi, this is my first post on this blog. I've blogged before but I think I'm actually going to use this one to speak what's really on my mind. For instance:  I really have no idea where my relationship is at with my boyfriend. I know lots of girls use their blogs to gush/complain/worship/rant about their boys but hopefully mine will not be like that. Anyways, other things that I want to talk about on here:  my friends, my family, my life, school, work... Just everything I guess which is really what the point of a blog is... Sharing your life with random strangers... Soungs extremly weird to me but here it goes.

     So... I will start with telling about myself, I guess. I am a senior in high school and I cannot wait for college. I am going to be an english major and I am planning to room with my bestfriend. She and I are like sisters but here recently we have begun to grow appart... It makes me sad to know that she wants space but I understand it... If we continue to be joined at the hip then come this fall when we have to live together we will probably be at each others throats so we decided to try spending time with other friends. Moving on, I live with my mother and father and I have a little sister. I was adopted when I was three months old and my sister was adopted when she was three years old. She and I are four years, six months, and two weeks appart. I do not know why I put that into such detail but there it is. I recently started working at a daycare near my home and I really enjoy my job. I want to be a teacher and so working with small children seemed like a good way to prepare myself. Anyways, I've got to run now because my sister and I are home alone and I need to get dinner started. I will most likely be back on here later tonight to continue my post and also to avoid my required reading for school. =]