Headstart @ MindSay

So ... :)  I've been off wandering the highways and byways for "better" employment, and I am happy to report success!  After a steady decline in personal satisfaction in the current position with the best bunch of 2 yr olds (yes, incl Mr. NF Nemesis) possible, I re-posted my illustrious resume online and was inundated with offers!  :)  A nice feeling! 

 

I almost took a private nanny position with 2 lovely children, but just didn't have that ... "settled" feeling in my gut, so I interviewed further, and I am soooooo glad I did! 

 

I start my new position 25 Feb working with no more than 6 young 2 yr olds and an aide in a new facility ... for significantly better wages, better benefits AND the potential for bonuses based on merit!  It is a private business and the owner pays at least 50% of tuition for relevant ed courses AND Best of all ... there is room for advancement into management, if I am interested after 90 days!  :) 

 

You may ask ... WHY am I changing jobs so soon after hire?  Aside from the fact that they refused to pay me the promised (but not documented) wage, for any of you who believe men and women are EQUAL ... NOT!!!! 

 

Childcare is traditionally a women's career choice, and as such, it is filled with women of all "denominations", sizes, shapes, philosophies, etc.  It is my observation that IN GENERAL (yes, there are exceptions), men are more skilled at distinguishing between the professional and personal.  My center director, for example,  a sweet young woman straight out of college at age 25, may have the best educational credentials this side of the Mississippi, but she has absolutely NO people skills. 

 

Childcare is a "people" business ... or at least it SHOULD be.  She and her supervisors, however, are very rapidly making it more about regulations than about child & their families.  This is monumental to me, and any of you who know me understand that the kids MUST come first.  My NEW employer has been in this business herself for over 25 yrs.  The director has also spent many years educating our children.  The entire focus, visible even in the layout of the center, is kids first.  Yes, rules and procedures are important, but there is such a thing as over-regulation!

 

More happy news to come...

 

~ B

I've been at the new job for a month, now.  I have to confess ... this is perhaps my least favorite job of the gazillion I have had in my lifetime.  WHY? 

 

When a teenager misbehaves, they have made a cognitive choice to do so (influenced by others, sure, but it's still their personal choice for the most part) and can be introduced to the concept of consequences. 

 

When a 2 yr old misbehaves, chances are it's because of something they see/ hear at home.  These kids ... my God ... they've only been alive for 2 years and already they have faced more than many people face in a lifetime ... the bad stuff.  Parents in jail for any number of offenses; physical, sexual & mental abuse; and occasionally, a simple, but well-hidden developmental issue.  Sometimes, I just want to scream! 

 

Today, I had my usual 6 - 2 yr olds.  The oldest one just turned 3 and will be "graduating" to regular headstart on Monday.  I told him (for the third time) to stop running, and he looked at me and said NO.  I arose from my "story chair", and as I approached him, he began to back away, head down, "please dont hurt me ... please don't hurt me!"  My heart broke.  I just wanted to hold him and make the pain (and the memories) go away ... but he wouldn't let me, at least not for another few minutes.  He has a sweet & kind heart, but occasionally, he "snaps" and simply pounds another kid for no reason.  It's what he knows. 

 

Then there is another boy who will be 3 Dec 6th.  He picked up the "rebellious" ball, and ran with it.  Every time I asked him to do something, he said NO.  (Yes ... the first word many kids learn!)  I have very ... very few means of discipline available to me.  I picked him up and put him on my lap.  I explained that I was the adult, and he was the child. It was his "job" to listen to me, and mine to keep him safe.  I explained that it is hard to play games and have fun when kids don't listen.  He looked at me like I was the man in the moon!  What a novel thought ... kids doing what grownups say!  :)  I wish I could say, he was a NEW kid!  hahaha  NOT!  But he is trying, I think.  I just hope my patience holds out!

 

But the highlight of my day was a bonefide temper explosion!  Where are the nice, well-behaved little girls???? That's what I want to know!  I have a roomful of boys and I'll go round and round with anyone who believes boys and girls are the SAME!  NO WAY HOSE A!!!!  Anyway ... boy #3 is on his cot for nap.  He is fighting sleep, whining, crying, fussing, but ... slowly he is sinking into sleep.  His gramma does the food ... opens the door and walks in.  YOu guessed it!  He exploded!!!  Screamed, cried, kicked, punched ... anyone!!!  I tried to hold him securely, but not so as to bruise him or frighten him and his struggle only intensified.  He was wearing a sweatsuit with no T-shirt ... and he's was working up a real lather.  I was blank.  No idea what to do ... how to calm him.  I asked the other teacher ... no clue.  She had never seen him like this!  So ... I took him to his gramma who promtly took him upstairs which threw off the preschool ratio!  OY!!  So now this has become a "center" issue.  I'll speak with the Director in the morning! 

 

So ... I'm in trouble already!  Sheesh!  Didn't take me long, hmm?  I spoke with the Family Resources Director this afternoon and basically asked ... What SHOULD I have done???  No answer ... just handle it!  I haven't been there long enough to have had time to actually read the procedures manual ... but it seems it doesn't really matter.  There are no "procedures" for handling multiple kids who are doing the mobb thing ... "No, we don't want to walk.  We want to run and if we fall it's YOUR fault and we'll tell mommy!"  So ... I rearranged the room ... again!  :)

 

I'm frustrated, though!  I cannot discipline the kids to teach them to behave.  It's obvious that most of them get their way completely, with only a few exceptions, and that angers me.  As if these kids don't have enough going against them ... and there's an entire generation like this!!!  God help us!  I'll survive this day and grow from it (I hope), but will they survive???  Will they make it to adulthood and learn "right" from "wrong"?  We can only hope ...

 

~ B

So ... after 2 weeks at my new gig, I thought I'd try to give a sort of ... report.  Let me preface it by saying that I have never been particularly drawn to young children.  As a teen, I never babysat because I didn't like little kids.  I dealt with my own when they were small, but that was a little different.  :P  My problem is that ... well ... remember Counselor Troy from STNG  (Star Trek Next Generation) ???  Well, I guess I'm kinda like her in that I "feel" much of what other people "feel," and when it comes to kids, espectially little kids, the issues belong to their parents and it makes me CRAZY.

 

For example:

• 3 and half year old boy; mom in jail for attempted murder; no dad in the picture; in foster care with his mom's mom's sister and her husband who are trying to adopt him.  Adorable, sweet boy...
• 4 yr old boy; both parents in jail for dealing drugs; middle child - older brother kicked out of every daycare/school in town for physical violence.  This boy is well versed in manipulation.
• 4 yr old girl - always smiling; mom just released from jail last month; no dad in picture.
• 5 yr old boy watched the FBI take his mom this morning from a prone position on the floor. 
• 4 yr old girl passed around to 7 or 8 different people.  No stability; no security.  She has a mom, but is usually with a sitter - one of several. 

I could go on ... It tears me up.  And even in a few of these little kids, the manipulative, power play attitudes are already present.  Neither parent working(if there are 2 parents), although from all appearances, healthy (I'm just talking about the ones at our center.), yet often, they are still sleeping when the bus arrives for their student.  These kids are all too familiar with violence, drugs, and loneliness.  <sigh> All I want to do is love all over these precious little ones and pray that they will somehow know ... that there are other choices! 

 

I don't get it ... How can people behave this way?  How can moms and dads be so irresponsible with the precious children they've been given? 

 

~ B

So, today I was informed that as of September 14th, I will be laid off for an undefined amount of time. I am so pissed off. I look at it this way though:  they gave me two weeks notice. Generally, if a layoff is due to budget issues, you would think the highest paid person would get their letter, right? Not in this case. Of the five TAs who were up for layoff, I have been there the longest and am the lowest paid (due to previous experience before coming into the company, not education). Something seems a bit fishy here!

TNT asked me to resign my position today. Great eh? Isn't it odd that they happened to have a new employee there today training as a 'sub' teacher. Yeah, uh huh, totally believe that one. When I had left there two weeks ago on a 'melt down' they ended up posting my position online. Odd that this person magically appears on what turned out to be my last day. Upon my arrival home, I got out my state licensing book for group childcare centers and found every single violation that I could recall, wrote them down, and called the licensing office to report the violations. Payback is a bitch!

 

Timing couldn't be better for this. Friday I had gotten a call from HeadStart and I was to call her back Friday before 3:30 or Monday morning. I didn't get the message on Friday until 5:30 and so I played the waiting game all weekend. Called this morning at 7:45ish and had to leave a message. She called me back to offer me the job that I had applied for. Considering that I am currenly unemployed fulltime, it was very hard to not just be like "I can start tomorrow!", but there are conflicts with my nanny job and there was also another job I had applied for and had the interview on Thursday as well.