Good Things @ MindSay 
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I guess it took the sound of rain to actually get me to typing this time around. That's cool I need to update anyways. So it's been over a week since I last update. The good news is that probably maybe a day or two I wasn't as mad about things anymore. Plus mom's jsut having it rough, but yeah I try to be careful not to make things get out of hand, that's why I don't tell her anything haha. She's been playing a TON of money lately. She's paid over $3,000 and things are going wrong still. So it's like you feel like you've done all this stuff but it still isn't done, yeah it's that kind of feeling.
On another note I've been reading The Watchmen. Which most of you should know a bit about it now because the trailer was shown everytime you went to see Batman: Dark Knight. I read through it probably at the beginning of the year, some surprises to me. However when I read through it a second time,man start seeing the stuff. That movie is going to be good and definately relates to what's going on right now. As in the media making things worse. In this the media really gets out of control and gets a lot of just regular people killed for like no reason and stuff. There's a lot of heavy stuff in the comic, probably the most difficult comic book I've ever read and the most reading I've done in a comic book as well. It might be hard to read because the comics came out back in 1985 and goes back in time about a bunch of stuff.
Alright more about me. I've been going around putting in my applications here and there. I may seem picky because I'm not just getting a job. I'm trying to get a job I know I be good at and not so much trouble in you know. You don't want to be stuck in a job you don't like that's for sure. Sure money has been a problem for me just recently, it's jsut because I'm almost completely out of money. Sure I spend here and there over the years. Not sure if was all greed or what not. One thing for sure is that I never spent that money on just myself. Sure comics or whatever but that's my hobby, and also anytime I eat out with friend I either help pay for them or I buy food for everyone, or I leave a tip I shouldn't be. I won't say I use money well, but at least my money has a bit more more meaning then just being plain money. Alot of guys wanted to hang out lately and I wasn't really feeling it because I didn't have anything. So far the guys have been paying everything I don't like asking at all but one of them said that I've been such a great person and that I always been paying for everything or helping someone out.
It blows me away when you don't realize you are making a difference until someone tells you to your face or your friends are helping you out big time or even just a little. So things I've been alright so far. Tried a men warehouse store, wouldn't mind working there because I can fix my wardrobe and start getting a bit more grown up stuff. Also applied at a sports bar, have two friends working there, plus it's fast money, and personality would be good. Abit scared hand writing never been that great and might take me a while to catch on. That always seems to happen. Throughout a lot of life I notice it takes me a longer time to catch on to things. I mean school and college have always been killing me than again I've been killing myself always having to play catch up. Just wish I could just learn stuff quickly. once I get a lot of practice down though I usually do quite well. David said he talked to the owner about me so it's just a matter of time. Don't mind about getting out of the house again either so hopefully that'll work out.
As for college. I really don't know what's going to happen there. I'm going to wait till the first two weeks are over and go in and see if there's something or get an appeal for going to college. Maybe I should join the army or navy or something I don't know. The only reason why I would of those things is I just want to go through the intensive training to get me in tip top shape nothing else really. I've been having a lot of problems that's for sure, and usually don't like talking about them. It's weird because I can probably be really conceited at times. I'm such n awesome person blah blah balh. Then when something bad happens I can't talk about it hardly at all. I guess the way to say it is.. Hmm.. thinking. I like talking about myself but I don't like talking about myself. Does that make any sense to you at all? @_@ See if I talk I get into too much of ME and if I don't talk people don't know ME. Wow such a double edge sword.
Been talking to people recently some have come to me for help and I've actually been able to answer them so well that people couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it ecause I was actually seeing it too. Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually being helpful or truly annoying. Most people I talked to say I should get into socialogy or of course pyschology. I don't know if I could do that, I can't pick my own brain and I think I'm right too often. I may not speak it but in my mind there's a right and wrong, sure there's gray areas, but usually I lead thoses back to right. Hopefully you are getting what I'm saying. That's about it for right now I guess.
For those of you who are willing, I would like you to say a prayer for me, in a few regards.
First of all, I am trying to get a little home based business off the ground. My husband paid some money for me to take a course on how to do this, and, of course, is expecting me to make a good go of it. I am in hopes that I will too, but it is taking a bit of doing. It takes ages to sign up for surveys, as they do screening surveys first to get all of our personal tastes and details in order to know which surveys to send me. Then I find I am inundated with mail in my inbox, asking me to consider everything under the sun that even remotely resembles working from home. So, I hope plowing through the beginning will be worth it.
I am learning how to go about blogging and getting it to make money with it, but that is next on the tutor's agenda. Please just pray that I will do well with all of this, as I have just not felt mentally stable enough to go out to work. So much of the unpleasant things about my past have been wrapped up in the workplace that I get anxious thinking about going back, although I can do it if i really give it a go.
And, oh dear! I just got over a bout of ear infection, where I could hardly lift my head from the pillow for dizziness, with incessant coughing along with it! I thank God for that, but I was so thrilled to have so much energy, that I bounded off to Curves For Women, the exercise club I attend, and had just had a wonderful workout, when at the very last, the rest of the women and I heard a snapping noise....and it was a tendon in my calf! That had never happened to me in the past, and it liked to have killed me!
I can hardly walk on the thing, and the only thing that dulls the ache a bit is the Lortabs the doctor so lovingly bestowed on my grateful self! So, that is the second thing to pray for, since I can't very well be drugged up and do the work as well, and it is SO SORE without the meds! So, I am just going to trust that it is well very quickly, so I can get back into the swing of things!
I am excited to be going to Kentucky in May for my daughter's graduation, which is another good reason to be completely healthy. I have never made a flight alone before, but I am sure it will be very exciting. I am one who has no inhibitions when it comes to asking questions if I cannot find my way in the huge Chicago airport! This move to Utah was the first time I have ever left my kids more than just to a camp every now and then, and I am so psyched about seeing them again. And I will be able to see my daughter's engagement ring, as she has been 'espoused' since I left!
So that is a good ending to this rather drab expose.
And last, but not least; thank you so much for all of the comments and compliments on my work of late! It spurs me on to write more, so thank you for the encouragement!
Bonniegirl
Dixie currently feels:
Despairing 
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Good things about today:
- We had a fire drill at break, and got 10 minutes extra because of it, hence, missing 10 minutes of Science.
- Science was a piss easy lesson.
- I got my results for my Science resit exam; an A, so I'm quite pleased.
- I got another bit of #1263 artwork finished in the library.
- I came home and played iSketch with Miraan, Adam, Ayshea and Stephen. It was fun, we had laughs.
- I talked to Adam for ages over MSN, sending each other really hilarious sound files.
- I laughed so much at a screenshot from our iSketch game, I almost crapped my pants. - Really, I was totally touching cloth. :)
[Though you may ask what's good about that one, I like to laugh, regardless of the consequences.]
Bad things about today:
- Results of my ICT exam, totally not happy. Two grades lower than I wanted.
- Thus, I have now given up on ICT.
- Thus, making only 3 out of 9 subjects that I still give a shit about.
- Coursework deadlines are indeed, stressing me out.
- I was tired throughout the whole day.
- I cried down my aisle after school, but Sammie comforted me.
- Claire is ignoring me. She seems really angry at me, and I don't know what I've done. I think she doesn't like me anymore.
- Emily isn't back... I haven't heard from her at all. No Mindsay comments, no emails, no anything...
...Where is my darling Emilpops......?
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