Girlfriend @ MindSay

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Wednesdays are just shit - it seems that nothing is ever going to change that. They always have been shit and as far as things have been going for the past 305 blogs, they always will be shit.
 
Tutorial was a pointless chore - just a rant presented in the form of a Powerpoint presentation from this gadge who is in charge of financial shite at Teesside Uni - but I did learn one thing - that scholarship Sarah mentioned; there's no hope in hell of me getting it. The tariff is 400 UCAS points - and there's no way I can get 400 from only three A2s. Fail.
 
Media Studies was an even more pointless chore - AM set us off doing some pointless "rebranding Teesside" work - and I utterly refused to work with nose-up-her-arse-Hannah - coz she's a fucking slag. Thus I was working alone, AM said I could work with Lewis - but Lewis has disappeared off the face of the planet this week. He better be back next week. :(
 
So up until now, the day was just a pointless load of faff - but when Photography came around - I got hyper off my tits - for no apparent reason. Hyper to the point where I thought it was hilarious to kick Shelly's pinhole camera across the car park. IT PROPER ROLLED. No seriously though, it WAS funny - just Shelly was in a pissy mood, so she decided to shout at me. So I proper bounded off back into college and she couldn't catch up with me because I had a massive lead and was walking faster.
 
Sometimes Shelly does this thing where she mentions something that REALLY doesn't need to be brought up - and she MUST do it just for the sheer sake of causing shit. Today she decided to turn around and say:
 
"I found a blonde hair in my bed this morning. It could have been yours, or it could have been Charlie's... OR IT COULD HAVE BEEN MARIA'S!"
 
And I'm like: "WHAT. YOU HAD YOUR EX ROUND."
 
She goes: "Yeah, I said I had A FRIEND round yesterday."
 
Thus, this destroyed my hyper mood. And when I drop from a hyper mood to a sad one - I LAPSE TO FUCK. So it's fucking obvious why I got so upset and refused to let Shelly touch me.
Then once again, she ignores my statement of DON'T TOUCH ME and tries to fucking hug me every three seconds. I mean seriously, can she not fucking listen?
 
Then when she tried to be violent back with me, I slapped her - so she wandered off to the table and sat and cried to herself - while I stood behind her with my half-empty water bottle, ready to BLUDGEON HER if she said the wrong thing.
 
When I had to go to film studies - Shelly stood in my way.
Now for one, it's a fucking stupid idea to stand in my way anywhere - but to stand in my way INFRONT OF A FLIGHT OF STAIRS? I hadn't realised how fucking stupid Shelly was.
 
I had to fucking fight my way past her - and after a run-in with some teachers at the door:
"FUCK OFF."
"Langage!"
"I'm sorry, but: SHE'S PISSING ME OFF - SHE WON'T MOVE OUT OF THE WAY, I HAVE A LESSON AND SHE'S GETTING ON MY NERVES."
 
After I finally fought past her - film studies was yet another wasted effort.
AM told everyone to "think of ideas for their film sequences" - and there's me, having already wrote my whole script THREE WEEKS AGO.
 
I sat right at the back of the room and because I had no other means to hurt myself, I repeatedly hit my knuckles with one of my beasty silver pens until they were red and sore.
 
AM did have a look over my script - she says there's nothing wrong with it, there's nothing I really have to change. She seems more excited about it than I am.
And bloody Ash seems more excited about Spieluhr than I am - it's so frigging weird.

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Seeing as how I didn't get to see Shelly alone yesterday, today was the next closest day to her birthday, so I chose to see her today. Before she came, I washed my hair, straightened up my room, hoover the floor - did all the general preparations that I do - then sat down to wait for her. I waited it out in style, assembling a quick playlist of some of my most-played top-rated songs, then making another attempt at the 2nd run of the Flopside Pit Of 100 Trials. Ach, how it is a cunt.

Shelly came when I was at about floor #89 - and she watched me finish it off.
At a time, I didn't think I'd make it - then I levelled up and my max HP went to 100HP, and was refilled - and then I was like PHWOAR, COME ON THEN SHADOO.
Kicked their arses and snagged those sexy rare cards. :)
Super Paper Mario is about an hour or two away from complete game mastery. Mwah ha ha.

I was in a weird mood today - really really turned on - so it wasn't long before I'd taken everything off and Shelly was getting her wicked way with me. :)
It wasn't fair - I couldn't do anything back because it wasn't the happy time of the month for Shelly. :(

We ate lunch together, hung out the washing - though Shelly is a blundering twat when I ask for her help with it, she just stands there and STARES at the washing line. Knob. :P

In one of our mad moments, we were trying to work out who had the biggest mouth - and naturally, I thought the best way to work this out would be to see how far my fist fitted into my mouth, then how far it fitted into hers. I tried it, but I pushed too hard on her throat and I felt her gag reflex - and she was a little bit sick on my hand. When I pulled it out, there were chunks of pizza on my knuckles. It was so fucking gross. :)
I have a phobia of vomit, so this lead to me legging it to the bathroom, holding my left fist at arm's length - then scrubbing away at it OCD-style. :)

Shelly is so self-doubting and gullible.
We were attempting challenges on Guitar Hero 5 - mainly the band challenges that prove easier with less people, and less bodge-ups from dopey Ash. One of the challenges was a simple "hit a 300 note streak" - and Shelly didn't think she'd managed it. I knew that she had - so I made a handshake bet with her - if she had, she had to lick my arse-crack. :)

And naturally, she got fucked over. Her face when the scores, percentages and note streaks came up was hilarious - it was the proper 'blush-whimper-hide-face-in-hands'. :D
But then she had to be a slag and try and kiss me with her befouled tongue - which was kinda yucky - but I did secretley enjoy being pinned to my bed. :)

Then we had a mooch through some of my old videos on my external harddrive - just proving to Shelly how much of a knob I was when I was 15. And we shared out some Petits Filous yoghurts - though I nabbed the vanilla one, because they're epic. So Shelly decided she'd be a slag and wipe the lids of hers on my nose. Gah.

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Today was the day I had to show the sequence from my chosen film in Film Studies. We're writing essays as part of the coursework - choose a 3-5 minute sequence from a film and analyse the micro features. Sarah was making us all show our sequences up on the whiteboard so we could "bounce ideas". Hmm.
 
Anyway, I chose my favourite film, Amélie - and when I was searching through it, looking for the bit I wanted - I only went and clicked the point on the bar when the "how many couples are having an orgasam right now?" bit came on. It was amusing, in its own little way.
I've picked quite a fast, yet horribly detailed sequence, so this "idea bouncing" idea actually helped; Sarah and some other people in the group had picked out some stuff that I hadn't even noticed, even after all the times of watching the damn thing.
 
On the way to the bus station, I stopped off at B&M and bought a Wispa bar for Shelly. I'd have gotten her a Crunchie, but they didn't seem to have any.
She'd told me she was coming at half 3 to 4 - but she didn't come until nearly 6. Her reasoning was summat to do with her parents, so I didn't really persue the matter.
Waiting for her, I'd been playing Guitar Hero II and gotten to a stage where I was only a few songs away from finishing both the easy and medium careers. When that's done, I can remove the game from the "to be completed" wallet and put it back in the box, ready for when I'm working the hard and expert careers.
 
(I can't alternate between all four of the difficulties - I need to finish the easier careers before I go onto the fun ones, otherwise I'll end up out of practice.)
 
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I got Shelly to play the ridiculous 1,000,000 roses level on We Love Katamari.
It's like, THE MOST POINTLESS, YET EVER SO SLIGHTLY EPIC LEVEL EVER.
 
Beat the game, collect all the cousins and what are you rewarded with?
A ridiculous challenge to collect a MILLION red roses - and according to guides, the quickest time to do it in is like TWELVE HOURS.
So if that's the quickest, I dread to think what the slowest is. :(
 
I left Shelly to it while I went to ring Ash.
But I ended up staying on the phone for like 45 minutes. The first 15 were spent talking to her mam coz our little Ash had done a total opposite of what we know her to do - and she'd gone to the university's STUDENT BAR.
 
When I told Shelly, she was like "ARE YOU SURE THAT'S THE RIGHT ASHLEIGH?!"
I wasn't sure myself either. :P
But Ash quickly redeemed her "Ash" status when I asked her if she was smashed and she responded with: "Norrr... I've had a coke..." (best spoken with the voice, naturally)
 
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Shelly and I spent a fun night together - we drank what was left of the bottles of fruit cider in the fridge, played a little bit of Guitar Hero and then we settled down to spend a few intimate hours together. :)

I have a job, I do what I always dreamed of.
I have a great girlfriend and we're getting married.
I have a family, a great loving mother and a so-so father.
I have enough health, enough money, a car.

But somehow, my life is so empty.

Maybe it's the season. This dark and uncertain weather.
Maybe it's the shifts that mess up with my sleep cycles.
Maybe it's my dog who looks as upbeat as I am.
Maybe it's the distance between me and my girlfriend.

I don't even have the energies to plan our wedding, everything seems so useless and boring.

When I come home from work, I always head for my bed.
I should be running to by girl's arms.
She always smells so good.
God, I miss her.

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Dixie currently feels:

 Content

 

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After yet another bland simple re-capping Film Studies lesson, I wandered into town and bought some stuff for Shelly and I to munch on.
She told me she misses the crisps from Home Bargains, so I bought her a bag of those, along with a Wispa bar.
I came home, straightened up my room - and Shelly arrived at half four.

We munched and played Guitar Hero.
I finished off the Easy career on Rocks The 80s and Shelly and I played a few songs on the co-op career.
We also did some work on her GH3 co-op career - but with me playing on Expert, both of us using older PS2 guitars - KNIGHTS OF CYDONIA.
So it was no wonder mam came in whinging and made us stop.

We switched to a quieter game: We Love Katamari and played a few levels - beating some of my older scores.
And yes, that damned Cowbear level continues to rile us both.

We shared a bottle of Jaques together and wound down, cuddling up to each other on my bed.
We spent a while laid on a pile of duvets and pillows on the floor. Before we could even get to doing anything ourselves - we could proper hear the bed banging about in the next room. It was so fucking funny. :)