Forwards @ MindSay 
i read a forward today that kinda bugged me. it was your typical 'if you really love God you'll pass this on' kind of e-mail. as i read it i found that what it was trying to say and it's purpose were good but i don't see why we can't make up a forward that people will laugh at and enjoy instead of getting them offeneded, anioed or mad in my case. i hate these kinds of e-mails for these reasons
1 just sending them is a cop out to trick christians in to 'sharing' their faith in a gutless way instead of actually getting their hands dirty and helping people for a change
2 they are in-affective, even christian begin to resent them
3 they rely on guilt tripping, defeating the purpose of them in the first place
4 and finaly, my faith does not relly on e-mails!
these are the reasons why i will delete or drastically change a forward that regards faith. i think it is good to have some christian forwards going around but please at least make them interesting to the majority of people, christian or not, and stop with the guilt tripping, it pisses me off.
Sometimes friends have to tell you things you might not like to hear, but need to. If you are one of those people who like to forward every e-mail you get, please repeat the following ...
1) I will NOT get bad luck, lose my friends, or lose my mailing lists if I DON'T forward an e-mail!
2) I will NOT hear any music or see a taco dog, if I do forward an e-mail.
3) Bill Gates is NOT going to send me money. Victoria Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me.
4) Ford will NOT give me a 50% discount even if I forward my e-mail to more than 50 people!
5) I will NEVER receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, Old Navy, or anyone else if I send an e-mail to 10 people.
6) I will NEVER see a pop-up window if I forward an e-mail! (If you do, you have a virus or trojan.)
7) There is NO SUCH THING as an e-mail tracking program and I am not STUPID enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding an e-mail to 10 or more people!
8) There is NO kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program in England collecting anything! He did when he was 7 years old. He is now cancer free and 35 years old and DOESN'T WANT ANY MORE POST CARDS, or GET-WELL CARDS!
9) The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that, if passed, will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every e-mail we send.
10) There will be NO cool dancing, singing, waving, colorful flowers, characters, or program that I will receive immediately after I forward an e-mail. NONE, ZIP, ZERO, NADA!!
11) The American Red Cross will NOT donate 50 cents to certain individuals dying of some never-heard-of disease for every e-mail address I send this to. The American Red Cross RECEIVES donations.
12) And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into forwarding an email by telling me if I don't I am not their friend or that I'm a bad person.
Now, repeat this to yourself until you have it memorized, and send it along to at least 5 of your friends before the next full moon or you will gain twenty pounds in the next three months! (No, not really! If you believe that last statement, go back and read this message again!)
~ B
A will is a dead giveaway.
A backward poet writes inverse.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count
that votes.
A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.
Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.
The guy fell onto an upholstery machine, now he is fully recovered.
Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.
A calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
The diminutive fortuneteller escaped from prison. The headline read "Small Medium at Large."
If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
I wrote this about five minutes ago. Copy it and email it around.
--
The email below has been sent around the internet for some time now...
>hey everyone, i dont normally send this sort of stuff out but had a look on the internet and its actually true . On the 1st of november , we will haveto pay for the use of our MSN and email accounts unless we send this messageto at least 18 contacts on your contact list. It's no joke if you don'tbelieve me then go to the site(http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/1189119.stm ) and see for yourself.Anyways once you've sent this message to at least 18 contacts, your msn dudewill become blue. please copy and paste don't forward cos people won't takenotice of it. Hey it is Andy and john the directors of MSN, sorry for theinterruption butmsn is closing down. this is because too many inconsiderate people aretaking up all the name (eg making up lots of different accounts for just oneperson), we only have 578 names left. If you would like to close youraccount, DO NOT SEND THIS MESSAGE ON. If you would like to keep youraccount, then SEND THIS MESSAGE TO EVERYONE ON YOUR CONTACT LIST. This is nojoke, we will be shutting down the servers. Send it on, thanks.WHO EVER DOES NOT SEND THIS MESSEAGE, YOUR ACCOUNT WILL BE CLOSED AND YOUWILL COST ?10.00 A MONTH TO USE. SEND THIS TO EVERYONE ON YOUR CONTACT LIST.NOW YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO. PLEASE DO NOT FORWARD THIS or REPLAY. COPY THEWHOLE EMAIL. GO BACK TO YOUR INBOX AND CLICK ON NEW. AND PASTE THANK YOU FORYOUR ATTENTION
Now if you actually go to that website mentioned, you will see that the date for that news report is the 25th of February, 2001. Pay careful attention to that. 2001.
Also too, the bulletin specifically says "Microsoft is reportedly planning to start charging surfers for the improved services of its MSN internet portal."
That's right, IMPROVED SERVICES.
Now that was in 2001. Are we paying for it?
If you want to use special stuff then yes. But MSN is still free for those who don't want to have fancy flash stuff happening on their computer.
"Fees will be demanded for extra services that are now under development, such as an advanced filter system to protect email accounts from junk mail." - another direct quote from the bulletin from 5 years ago...
Another thing, if it really was Andy and John, the directors of MSN, you'd think they could spell a little better huh?
So this is a forward to tell everyone not to panic. And you don't have to send any more emails to all of your buddies telling them that MSN is closing down. If you think about it, that email has been circulating since 2001. And hotmail is still up and running. Otherwise you would never get this huh?
So yeah... Cheers. And keep on typing!
By the way...
Send this to everyone on your contact list or your left foot will grow mushrooms on it and your eyes will turn pink.
If you send this to three of your friends the sun will rise tomorrow.
If you do not send this message on, it will probably rain somewhere in the world.
Don't break the chain!!!
--
Also too... Check this out... I just found it after all that typing... It would have been SOOO much easier to just email that link around... -_-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/4778046.stm
So yeah, check out the pages. And email that around. Just so that people know... And maybe, just maybe, one stupid forward will be gone...
I guess you could say that this one is starting but you know... At least it's funny and it makes people think a little more huh?
Happy hunting!
-Matty.
God. Due to the uncanny amount of religious bullshit that's been shoved in my face lately, (check comments on "Birds singin' in the sycamore trees...") I'm going to bitch. After all, I'm good at it, and I've heard that if you don't, you'll explode.
I received an email today from a girl who I was in my class in school for seven years. I even went to the church at which her father is the pastor for a couple of years. I'm not a morning person, so I seldom attended the morning Sunday services. I mostly went to youth group and choir stuff. I can't remember the last time I talked to this girl, but I know it's been at least two years. Anyway, the email:
I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is. You are my 8 in 8 seconds. I am not breaking this. No way! I'M TOLD THIS WORKS!!!!! Bishop T.D. Jakes "8 Second Prayer." Just repeat this prayer and see how God moves!! "Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen." Pass this message to 8 people {EXCEPT YOU AND ME}. You will receive a miracle tomorrow. I Hope that you don't ignore and let God bless you.
Jesus fucking blaspheming Christ. I don't believe in the christian god, and I sure as hell don't want to waste my time reading this bullshit. Any god who grants miracles to those who are proficient in e-mail forwarding just isn't my god-cup of tea. Ya know?
Of course she'd rather live her life as if there is a god and die to find out there isn't one, she's a christian. Isn't that the idea? I'd much rather look at the facts, and determine that god is just something people have created to help them deal with death mostly, as well as to have an example of what's right and what's wrong.
Ya wanna know what I think is wrong? Not only wrong, but annoying, disappointing, uncouth and offensive? Contacting someone for the first time in years with some bullshit about what you believe without even sayin' "Hi, how the fuck are you?" What would Jesus do? Well, first of all, he'd show some concern for my well-being. Jesus was quite the humanitarian, I hear. He cared about people. Doesn't that mean christians should also care about people by modeling their lives after christ, who gave a fuck about people? Maybe not. What the hell do I know? What else is there in this world but people? If you can't do good for people, what can you do good for? Maybe the world itself, I mean the environment. You ought to feel some sort of responsibility to keep this world a place we can live in comfortably for the people who'll live on it next, and after that, and after that, and...that'll probably be about all she wrote. The world's goin to hell in a handbasket, you know.
So, to all of you Jesus-email forwarders and bible slingin' Xians, please, fuck off, and keep your emails to your Xian friends. I don't want or need to hear about it. Especially when you only pretend to show concern for my soul, and you don't even exchange some standard pleasantries.
How have you been, Stacy? Goin' to school? Got a job? Just preachin' some more? I see...well, good talkin'. Over and get the fuck out of my email! I didn't really write all of that back, because I don't care how she's doing. I don't know her. This is how I replied:
Hi Stacy.
Please don't send me any more of this type of thing. I'm not into it.
I hope your god provided you with your "miracle" for sending it
though.
Thanks,
Me
God, I'm AWFULLY corgile. Oh well, call it manners, call it hemahunayakisock. I'd be wasting my time telling this chick exacly how I feel, anyway, right? I guess I don't give a fuck if she knows how I feel or not. I know how I feel, and now you do. Lucky us.
Check out some other entries I wrote before I discovered the beauty of mindsay: http://ophoria.myblogsite.com/blog