Fate @ MindSay 
love
If you are ever lucky enough to find the one you will always love nomater what, my advice is this:
fight for that love with tooth and nail. no one will ever compare to that one. nomatter what happens in life you will always remember the one. and you will kick yourself for eternity for letting them go.
and if the fates dosent like you.... hahahaha... well.. the three greek bitches will have a pow-wow and decide to give you some one, who is so similar to the one that they would have been the one, if you had met them first. but the crule bitches will place them on the otherside of the planet. and you will suffer for all eternity knowing that they are there seeing other people.. and if the fates have it in for you.. then the new one will be in love with some one else the way you were with the one... man you would not know how much that would suck.
Do you believe in fate? If you believe that our life is a pre-destined one, then what is the purpose of us living?
I believe that fate do play a part in our life. Things happen for a reason. But if fate controls our life, then what is worth striving for? If we leave it to fate, we became reactive in life and we tend to blame the world and everyone for our failure in life.
There are things that are beyond our controls. We cannot control whom we are born to. We cannot control that we are born poor or born rich. We cannot control accidents that happened in our life, leaving some handicapped by the accidents.
What we can control is how we react to these incidents and how we make used of our life.
Fate is like food ingredients. One person can get the best food ingredients in the world but does not mean that he can cook the best dish. Conversely, the one who get the worst ingredients might not make the worst dish.
There are many examples around us that show the differences in how they make use of their ingredients. One can be born in a wealthy family, go to the best school and have a bright future of becoming a doctor (these are his ingredients, his fate). But he become a drug addict and ruins his bright future. On the other hand, one can be born handicap, his family is not so wealthy but he can become a great motivator and inspiration to the society.
Fate is the raw materials of experience. They come uninvited and often unanticipated. Destiny is what a man does with these raw materials. ~ Howard Thurman
We do have choices in life! If we strictly believe that our life is a pre-destined one, we are left with no choice. Being proactive in our life means taking responsibility for your actions and your situation. Stop blaming the world for whatever happened to you. Make use of the situation and cook a good dish out of it!
I'm a sucker for love, and i'm a sucker for her.
That's it, its the truth. I am an absolute sucker for the thought of being truely, honestly loved. I can hear some pretty outlandish things, but sometimes there are feelings behind those words that can really rattle me to the core. Tonight, i walked around the mall with the girl that has had an unshakable grip on my heart for some time now... and we've both come to terms with the fact that we both really, really like eachother. To the point where, we know we're going to date- its just a matter of time before our first date.
What really makes me feel like im falling for this girl? Here's what it is.
The way she looks me dead in the eyes and smiles whenever we're talking- not just a half-hearted, "hehe, you're kinda funny." look, but a full-on, warm, "i love the sound of your voice" kind of smile. The way she's always walking right next to me and reaching for my hand, and never afraid to wrap an arm around my waist. The way she puts her head on my chest, locks my fingers with hers, and lightly rubs my arm during a movie. The way she hugs me, and doesn't let go immediately- she hands on and squeezes tightly. The way she tries to match my breathing when we're together (i know she does this... i actually stopped breathing and she laughed.) The way she calls me in the morning, and i absolutely love hearing the sound of her voice (and trust me, i am not a morning person.) The way she tells me she doesn't want to go away from school, if that means being away from me if things get serious... The ways, the ways... the ways that she makes me melt in her dark, mysterious eyes. It's just so surreal, after all of the BS that has been shoveled on my lap, this could be the changing fate.
I pray to God, that i never, ever have to go back and change this entry... I hope that im right, and i hope even more that i finally found something that will last.
~O~
So instead of either taking the hell trains back, or walking, I decided to walk to 6th ave and take the A/C/E trains to West 4th. This killed my idea of stopping by Crate and Barrel to buy the mom I work for a nice gift, but there are other days. And other stores.
I get on the A or C (don't know) at Canal. It goes Canal -- Spring -- West 4th (my stop). At Spring Street, when I finally put my headphones on, I look up and on the platform....HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE DRESSED UP LIKE SANTA CLAUS, CHANTING, "HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO! HO!". And then they all boarded the train with me and sort of sung carols and chanted Ho several more times and continued to drink 'Santa's power juice' which wasn't much more than whiskey and vodka and something light brown. And one of them told me I wasn't making good use of another Santa's mistletoe, but that was just good common sense on my part. I got off and told them they were fantastic, and the same one said, 'no, YOU'RE fantastic' which coming from Santa (even as a non-Christian) was a nice compliment. And then, as the train pulled away, I realized that FOUR OR FIVE CARS were FULL OF SANTA CLAUSES on their way to Times Square.
And I woulda missed it all had I not been so lazy.
Of course, being lazy also meant I walked out without my camera or even my phone, so I have no documentation of this fantastic happening of my life.
But it was amazing :)
(below is apparently what I tried to copy and paste into a word doc before, with little or no success. But I thought I had copied 'HO!' and was instead met with this, in the perfect columns they came from, courtesy of the LIRR. Damn you, microsoft word!)
| 41 PM | 2:24 PM | | Jamaica | 2:05 PM | Off Peak | |
| 2:41 PM | 3:24 PM | | Jamaica | 3:05 PM | Off Peak | |
| 3:41 PM | 4:24 PM | | Jamaica | 4:05 PM | Off Peak | |
| 4:41 PM | 5:24 PM | | Jamaica | 5:05 PM | Off Peak | |
| 5:41 PM | 6:24 PM | | Jamaica | 6:05 PM | Off Peak |
I was babysitting tonight, and I decided with my new-found (and undeserved, I have to admit, since bedtime was 8:30 and at 10:30, everyone was still up but the parents apparently expected as much...) wealth, I could take a cab home; especially since it was 10:45 at night and I was cold and alone and a good half-hour walk to my building.
I waited on 14th and B, but a guy stood on the more east corner, and got the cab that was meant for me. Lame. But because that happened, I ended up getting this really cool, nice driver who was good to talk to; I let him down that I wasn't going out tonight, didn't have a boyfriend, have never been to Richmond Hill, and am not partially Indian, but we had a good ride. I had asked him to drop me at Laguardia and Bleeker, which is right outside my building, but halfway through the ride I said, 'just dropping me off at the park is fine, I can get home from there' so he wouldn't have to deal with something on Third Street. I've walked thru and around Washington Square Park to know this isn't a big deal.
Because I cut through the park, I walked by the Kimmel Center for Student Life. And because there IS such a thing as fate, who was standing in the lobby of Kimmel? SARREA. My Sarrea. Holy shit. Apparently, the All University Gospel Choir performed tonight and I missed it :( but Sarrea, a former singer/member drove in to see them. AND I GOT TO SEE HER. And Danielle and Isabel, which was also fantastic, but just Monday or Tuesday I was thinking about Sarrea and then, there she was. She was with Krystal and Marta who I don't know but sorta know. And she was also with Mo, who remembered me from Relay for Life!!!! And is quite cute:). And then they're friend Noah showed up and just gave me a giant hug whilst introducing himself to me. Better late than never? Whatever, I like hugs. And I like seeing people I know.
And none of this would have happened if I hadn't decided to take pity on the cab driver who didn't wanna go all the way to the village.
Super <3.
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