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...but the Jonas Brothers aren't bad.

Perhaps I should explain.

I've spent the last few months or so slagging of the Jonas Brothers for being talentless idiots with awful songs. Two days ago, I heard When You Look Me In The Eyes played on the radio. I immediately fell in love, and waited around for a while to see if the radio DJ mentioned who sang it. When he said it was by the Jonas Brothers, my heart sank. It really did. But I got over it and I went and downloaded the song. I came to the conclusion that the thing I never liked about the Jonas Brothers, and the reason I never gave them a fair chance, was their fans. Obsessive little tweenage girls who consider the Jonas Brothers to be rock. They're not. They're pop-rock.

But I was thinking that maybe the overly obsessive fans are the reason for people hating other bands, like My Chemical Romance, Fallout Boy and Panic At The Disco.

Anyway, after listening to some of the Jonas Brothers' other stuff, I've decided that When You Look Me In The Eyes is the only song of theirs I really like. The rest seem to be a bit to "kiddy" for my liking. But still, at least now I can justify my opinion, which actually makes me feel good about myself.

God, I swear there's something wrong with me. The second someone else starts to like something, I dont feel special anymore, I want to stop liking it. Like, in all honesty, I dont enjoy other fan's company. I dont want to talk to a bunch of kids who go "Ohemgee, I like, LOVE Wicked. Idina is teh sheetz. I dont want to see the movie 'Enchanted', but I'm going just cuz IDINA omgzorz is in it! ZOMGER, Kristen Chenoweth! Lets pretend we cared about the shows she was in before Wicked!"

I'd much rather hang around people who have a mild interest or no interest at all in what I love. Sounds wierd, neh?

 

Dont get me wrong. Dizzy, I dont mind that you're getting into Avenue Q or Spelling Bee. I love that you're interested in those shows. It's because they reminded me of you, I guess. Though I will kill you if you introduce it to your Lehman friends and they walk down the street singing "If You Were Gay".

 

Am I making any sense?

 

Ok, let me try and put this into sense-making words.

 

I hate people who think they're the biggest fans in the world. I hate those people that mistake Eden Espinosa for Idina Menzel. I hate those fuckers who wait outside the stage door with flowers for Eden, and wind up giving them to Jenna Leigh Green. It happened, I was there. Jenna was in Sabrina the Teenage Witch, and I loved her ever since I knew what acting was. I was going to get her autograph, and these people scream "Eden! Eden!" Shower her with gifts, jump on her, take pictures, and then she goes "Uh... I'm not... Eden."

They go: "Oh, ok." And act like she's no longer relevant.

 

Not only do I hate the wanna-be fans, I hate the rabid fans. Those fat chicks who have nothing better to do than make accounts on sites like "DaNxtElphie" or "DefyGravty" (By the way, I'm getting a new account with a better name. 'Cause Elphiechan is the ultimate Wapanese/Poser name.). Those kids who know everything and anything, plus more. The people who make scrapbooks to give to Megan Hilty because it's her final performance.

Dont get me wrong, I know I'm pretty obsessed myself, but these kids are like... geez! They actually make presents for these actors and give them to them. And they send them flowers, and cards, and all personal shit like they know them! I'm sorry, but thats just pathetic. Get a little bit more of a life, and stop saying how much you're like Elphaba (OMG, misunderstood!).

 

And then there are these types of people:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EEpMLSfVG0

 

Alright, the link above is to a Wicked spoof. It has different songs than Wicked, but its the same premise. They used it for a witch's backstory on a soap opera. I, personaly, love the first number. I watch it every day because I can't dowload it ("Please tell me this can't be truuue, I know I can't live with someone like youu!"). I'm a Wicked fan, I still loved it.

 

But GOD! Read some of the comments! It gets me so pissed off. It's like "Ick, they shouldn't have made fun of Wicked" "Omg dis sux its just an xcuse to rip off of Wicked!" "Dey shudnt hav mad it cuz der r so many wickd fanz!"

It's like, get of your trojan horse, bitch! Calm down, its just a spoof. I mean, thank god Dizzy taught me to laugh at my fandoms, otherwise I'd be one of those idiots.

 

So, I guess the point of these little rambles is that I'd love to live in a world where Wicked, Rent, Spring Awakening, Kristen Chenoweth and etc. weren't so popular. I cant sit down and have a conversation with a rabid Wicked fan, I just cant. I dont want what I love to become an obsession for everyone else...

 

But if I hate all the fans, does this mean I hate myself? Ah, I'm so confuzzled.

After watching VH1's Bands Reunited: Information Society, I started to get angry at the host and camera people for disrupting my favorite band's members' lives.  I didn't like the way they sprung on them.  And the more I watched other bands reunited get sprung on and asked (or should I say forced?) to meet past members they may have had a bad falling out with, the more I started to feel guilty for just watching the drama unfold -- it's like as soon as some people get recognized for their talents or genius we all want to get inside them and disrupt their private lives and bother them with all kinds of unappropriate questions.  Once you're famous, it's as if the world assumes it owns you, and to hell with you if you can't handle that kind of attention, right?  Whatever.  All I know is that there are times while I'm watching a documentary or reading a biography where I start to feel, well, for lack of a better word, stupid.  At other times, while putting together a wiki page or other kind of fan page or while participating in discussions about famous people in online forums I start to wonder: "Why am I talking about these people like I know them?" 

 

Of course we're all gonna do it.  It's only natural to feel like they are a real part of our lives even if it's only the music making our heads swim with love.  But I also find it funny that fans talk about their favorite personalities as if these people are living next door.  I still have conversations off line with friends where we address celebrities on a first name basis.  Anyone who overhears our chatting would assume we were talking about people we know intimately, but truth is, we don't!

 

So let me get back to the Information Society reunion...  First off, I've been a fan ever since I first heard "Walking Away" and "What's On Your Mind" in 1988.  The reason why I've been a fan is mainly because I loved the music.  I wasn't into them only because I thought they were better than me or that I worshipped them for their clothes or hairstyles.  In concerts and videos they entertained me with a mix of different musical genres and styles I liked.  Plus the music just fit my own personality well -- a funky blend or industrial potpourii of synth pop and electro hip-hop.  I especially loved the computer samples intertwined with the vocal stylings of Kurt Harland.  An obsession with their personal lives never entered my mind... well, not entirely.  As soon as I saw them in interviews, read magazine articles, and noticed that Amanda and several other members were coming and going...  no matter how lovely the music, there were stories going on behind the scenes and it's only human to get a bit curious as to what is going on.  But would I ever dare to walk up to one of the guys in the band and directly (rudely) ask them about their personal relationships?  No.  I'd leave that up to the  Lifetime TV movie people.  Or wait maybe a few years for people to get nostalgic enough to want to re-examine their life stories in based-on-a-true-story fictional dramatic reconstruction of their time and lives. 

 

But that's just it, fiction is a fine way to celebrate the legend of a band, as long as it is handled well.  Fact is better, but too often the true life stories of famous people are written and unauthorized by those with a chip on their shoulder or a worshipful bias.  With that said, I don't always agree with journalists and authors of sensational, or so-called exclusive biographies.  I don't need someone to form my opinions for me.  I would rather hear the true stories from the artists themselves...  However, it must also be frustrating to have everything you say broadcast to the world as if it's written in stone!  I can see how a mental complex can form when you've got too many people following you and leaning on every word you say.  It must be so frustrating at times, yet I can't experience the weight of that kind of fame, only imagine it.

 

Sometimes we are allowed to see only peeks into the lives of our favorite artists and perhaps that's all we should see.  We should care more about what we think than what someone famous thinks, right?  And yet it's that very thing which can direct our attention to something important.  We do tend to look up to these people like human gods because they are in the spotlight, not us, and being in that light gives them the privledge to speak (or sing) and be heard by millions.  Not everyone who committs to being in a band acquires that heavy dose of fame, but some do and I don't think everyone is equipped to handle that kind of publicity.  At some point, once a band gets enough hit songs under their belt, you have to prepare for the onslaught of prying eyes and ears, in fact that's the whole point of producing popular music.  Again, I can only imagine this and wonder how I've contributed to the illusion fame puts on some of these people.

 

But what makes me feel somehow comforted is seeing my favorite artists being the normal people they are.  I like that kind of disillusionment.  I want to see them being human.

 

And yet there is that little thrill shivering through my belly at the thought of meeting them in person.  No matter how much I remind myself that these people are human and normal, the excitement of meeting someone I admire can still excite a deliciously sweet anxiety I don't mind experiencing.  So, when all is said and done, seeing a favorite artist in a television show is the safest way to experience what it might be like being in the same room with them.  But I still believe we should shut off the cameras and let them decide when they want to be in that spotlight!  Don't you agree? 

I realize I've been very much not here lately, and I haven't had anything profound to say.  But you know, I notice my recent visitors list, and I know that plenty of you are coming to read.  I try to only post when I have something to say that is worth reading, or will get some kind of feedback from the people.  Lately my few entries have been that, in my opinion. 

 

So I fail to see why hardly anybody is saying anything.

 

I understand not having anything to say, but Jesus, people, nobody even laughed at the random quotes.  I mean, come the fuck on.  I live for this shit, all right? 

 

I feel there's no point in me posting anything if nobody has anything to say.  Cuz I'm not using this as a diary-thing.  I like my audience.  I don't hold any grudges against anybody, but if I don't have an audience, then I may as well be talking to myself.  I do that plenty enough in real life, and it just seems kinda redundant to do it online as well.

 

So yeah.  If you're not interested in what I have to say, don't come.  I'll be dissappointed, but I'm no more obligated to read/comment on yours than you are to read/comment on mine.  I can't force you to respond to my ramblings any more than I can force you to read them.  So if you're not interested, you are free to go on your merry little way.

 

Let me make something very clear:  I don't feel like you should have to comment to every God damn thing I post on here.  It's just lately in my scattered postings, I've noticed plenty of people that come to read after I've posted something, but then they leave and don't comment, though they continue to come back.  I'm not talking about random visitors, I'm talking about people I've had in my network for a long fricking time -- people I considered some of my "loyal fans", if you will.  They were always the ones to respond to my stuff, and now they're just reading and leaving.  And that's kinda aggravating, considering how bad I've felt about not posting anything for you guys in the last few months.

 

Forgive me if I sound bitchy.  Quite frankly, I feel bitchy.  So it makes sense if I sound as such. 

 

I'm not turning into one of those people who whines for people to comment on their stuff.  I just want my damn audience back, otherwise I'll just go on not posting as before.  I'll take my five die-hard fans and just leave the rest. 

 

I reiterate:  I'm not mad at you, whoever "you" happens to be.  I'm frustrated at the lack of feedback in general. 

 

I'm going back to sleep.

 

TheFallenAngel

How many of you will be attending Super Bowl parties? How many of you attending are not really football fans?

 

Nothing bothers me more than people who become football experts during the Super Bowl even though they haven't watched a game all year. The Super Bowl has been a joke for at least the last decade. Probably longer. It's a party for a bunch of corporate jackoffs.

 

There are hardly any real fans at the game. The pre-game show begins on Saturday. The halftime is like drawn out torture.

 

Anyway, enjoy the game!