Emergency @ MindSay 
fire
Tony's care blew up today. He has first and second degree burns.
And no one could even say, "Wow, what a shame."
But you could all stop in and gawk at the pictures.
I'm disappointed in you.
Some days I can just never do anything right, the old "rock and a hard place" line.
Work in the ER these days has been taking a toll. As usual someone up in the Ivory Tower decided to make some changes without ever asking the minions down here if it would work. Amazing how change for the sake of change tends to take on a life of it's own.
The chaos never stops and the people in the ER rarely see beyond their own issues to even consider that something might be going on that is beyond the limited view they have from the waiting room. Today a patients mother said to me "my god you never stop, you look so tired". I realized that was the first kind word anyone who was a patient or family member had said to me in a very long time. Most days I hear constant complaining about the wait, how lazy we nurses are, even though we have 2 to 6 patients on stretchers to care for while we wait for doctors, tests, specialists etc. to come back. They don't see us drawing blood, starting IV's, writing the copious amounts of paperwork that needs doing, or giving medications in every way possible.They also don't see us cleaning up blood after the doctors, or taking out tubes and IV's from a dead body, or dictating a report on a trauma. If we do get a minute to run to get a coffee to bring back to the desk, or eat a sandwich on the fly there are comments from the waiting room about how we are always on breaks. I don't remember the last time I sat down to eat at work. I've forgotten how to chew more than once before gulping down food to just get my blood sugar up enough to keep going.
I know I'm just having a bit of a pity party. I'm tired. At times like this I wonder how long I can keep doing what I do. Other days I have no question's as to why I am here. But today, I'm tired.
I have tried my best to continue my promised month of humor but it has been quite difficult lately to find much humor in my life as my continued journey with cancer related treatments hit a slight bump in the road in the last couple of weeks. For those of you who have wondered where I have been for the last couple of weeks, I have been quite occupied with possible chemo side affects that caused a bit of pain and suffering and I eventually ended up in the hospital emergency room after a long week of pain and misery.
End Of Cycle Two
At the end of my second cycle of chemo at the higher dose, things started to get very bad as far as side or after affects. With nausea, vomiting, loss of appetite, lack of sleep and at least a couple of occasions where my digestive system completely shut down, my body was completely pushed to the limit of what any normal person could stand. This all began around the 6th of August. After a little more than a week of trying to overcome the affects, several calls to the clinic with no real solutions and what seemed like very little support I could no longer deal with the issue on my own and realized I needed some serious intervention.
Hospital Emergency Admittance
By the 15th of August I could not deal with the issue anymore on my own and knew I needed some serious help so I drove myself into the hospital emergency room and was admitted shortly thereafter. I was in bad enough shape I had to be put on IV saline solution and after testing and x-rays it was noted I had developed a partial bowel obstruction. Plus due to not eating for over a week was also malnourished as well as dehydrated. I stayed on the IV for a few days before I was allowed to start a modified liquid diet which eventually was increased to a full liquid diet. Eventually on the last day or two I was put back on a regular diet (after they managed to screw that up several times) and was finally cleared to go home on the 23rd. I have now been home for almost two days and am trying to readjust and get myself back into shape so we can determine what and how we are going to proceed with the next chemo cycle. Many things went on during my stay some of which makes me wonder about how some people make it through such an ordeal and manage to survive. I was assigned a hospital physician who spoke like she just arrived here from Germany and had the bedside manner of Attila the Hun. I had to correct her several times and even towards the end she admitted she didn't know what to do for me. Since I started out on IV I had to have most everything from pain meds to nausea meds injected. After 4 or more different IV sites plus a couple of botched insertions and all the blood samples, my arms looked like a junkies who had been abusing drugs for years. That plus the fact the anti nausea drug Phenergan is so very caustic it virtually started to destroy my blood vessels which is why they had to switch IV sites so often. It was literally eating my veins away.
Home Again
So here I am home at last trying to recover from my recovery and hopefully gain enough strength to be able to deal with the next cycle of chemo or whatever I have to deal with in the next 4 to 5 months before I can have my final surgery and be free to live hopefully a more normal life. I did add some information on chemo treatments in my July 27th post below. At that time I did not realize I might be adding more details on what can happen if it gets out of control like mine did. I hope and pray the remainder of my treatments goes much smoother and the journey is completed soon. There is only so much abuse a body can take both physically and mentally. I don't want to find out what my limit is and I hope I don't approach that limit in the next or any future cycles. It is not a pleasant thing to deal with.
I did say in a much earlier post that this journey was not going to be easy so bear with me my dear friends while I go through my ups and downs, with my good days and bad. I may not always be in the best of moods or feel like being very creative but that does not mean I will forget my friends who have prayed for and supported me along this road of uncertainty. I will always be grateful for your thoughtful and caring support and prayers. Just bear with me for a bit longer and all will be well again soon.
My Hospital Stay
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