Domestic Violence @ MindSay

Today was the annual block party my workplace holds to kick off Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  We had games, prizes, door prizes/raffles, clog dancers, belly dancers, music, FOOD, face painting and crafts....I worked from 9:30 am until 2:30 pm.  I learned how to make egg rolls and helped in making 500 of them!  Yep, lots of leftovers!  We also awarded 3 community members for their outstanding work in helping victims of domestic violence.  The first was an investigator that works with the county's DA office.  He's amazing....I've had him speak in one of my classes so I know how personal and serious he takes his job.  The second person awarded was the head of the county humane society.  She was awarded because my agency has an agreement with them in which they house pets of families that are fleeing violent homes.  It's an amazing thing they do in helping us/our clients that way because often times there are families who want to leave but don't want to leave their pets behind.  Most, if not all, shelters don't allow animals so this enables them to be able to get a fresh start and keep their furry loved ones safe too.  The third person awarded was the police chief of a nearby suburb that we work very closely with.  After multiple domestic violence related homicides in his district, he took a major stand and his force implemented a new program and new efforts to combat domestic violence.  More law enforcement should be as dedicated and take it as seriously as he does.  News crews were there, and I missed being on tv by a few inches - the person I was standing next to was on tv, but I wasn't.  Oh well.  I know I was there, and I smell like greasy egg rolls to prove it!  There was also a table with information about therapy dogs....and there were probably 8 or so dogs there too....that drew a crowd too.  I had a really great time and I was honored to be involved with the event!

Most of you know that I volunteer and am an intern at a domestic violence agency.  I've been there since March 2007 and it's the first place in my life that I've felt like I belong.  I have seen some incredible things, both heartbreaking and heartwarming, but I know that working with abuse victims is something I would like to do in my career. 

Recently I was asked, by an instructor, to define social activism.  My classmates came up with many different things, but my bottom line is that I feel it is when someone takes an active role in bringing an end to a problem in society.  It's easy to say "I don't think it's right to be violent towards my loved ones." but it's entirely different to actually do something about that.  Words are just that. 

In my work I've learned that domestic violence is something that still has a dirty, nasty stigma attached to it.  People don't want to hear about it or talk about it or see it.  We are currently trying to raise money through a Capital Campaign for a new facility because the one we are in is atrocious.  The proposed site for our new facility has been met with extreme resistence because the residents are concerned about a variety of things.  People actually said they don't want to see the building - it looks like a fancy house, not an institution or a homeless shelter or anything.  It's very unassuming and the point of it is to fit in with residential areas.  We've never had a problem with safety of neighbors in our current location, but yet people brought that up.  Largely it's a matter of these residents being uneducated and unwilling to learn about domestic violence.  To learn the FACTS about it and how it can affect them.  They say women don't need a new shelter, but yet one of their own might need it someday.  They don't want the abusers driving around in their neighborhood looking for their victims....the only problem is that abusers already exist in their neighborhoods!!  They exist in YOUR neighborhood!!  It's the seemingly perfect family, the doctor with a lovely wife and well behaved kids.  It's the frail old couple, their kids....it's the gay couple down the block, it's people you work with and see in the grocery store.  Domestic violence does not discriminate.  It knows no race, age, gender, sexual orientation, class.  Don't be fooled into thinking that it doesn't happen, or that it only happens to someone else, somewhere else.  It DOES happen - to men, to women, to children, to parents, to grandparents, to family, friends, IT DOES HAPPEN.

On the news tonight, there was part of a press conference from earlier today.  WCADV (Wisconsin Coalition Against Domestic Violence) released its domestic abuse related homicide statistics for the 2006-07 year.  http://www.wcadv.org/?go=about/news_pressrelease&id=41  My county which is the largest in area (my city is the largest in the county) was the HIGHEST in the state, aside from Milwaukee.  In 2006-07, we had 4 incidents that resulted in 8 deaths.  It isn't something to be proud of!!  It needs to stop!!  FYI, the report lists the names and backgrounds of the murders of all of the 52 victims in each county in my state.  These people will NEVER be forgotten!!  http://www.wcadv.org/index.cfm?go=download&id=1060

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  Last year I posted a few blogs with facts, and if I have the time, I will do that again.  I may just repost the same things because other than statistics, not much changes.  I want to issue a challenge to anyone who reads this.  I'm hopeful in the human race, perhaps foolishly so, but it is my hope that people can become active in the fight against domestic violence.  I challenge all of you to take part, somehow.  Pass on the word, educate others, volunteer at a local agency, donate food and/or clothing to a local women's shelter, protest....DO SOMETHING!!  Until we're willing to face this problem head on, it can't be extinguished!  Brushing it under the rug does not mean it doesn't exist!  It does exist, and it will continue to until everyone takes a stand to bring it to an end!!

Visit the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence to find your local organizations: http://www.ncadv.org/resources/StateCoalitionList_73.html, http://www.ncadv.org/resources/InternationalOrganizationResources_122.html, http://www.ncadv.org/resources/OtherUSOrganizations_72.html

~ In memory of those who have lost their lives at the hands of their abuser, and in honor of those who had the courage to escape. ~

By Navy Petty Officer 1st Class Douglas Mappin

Special to American Forces Press Service

July 1, 2008 - The first class of the Afghan National Police's "Jump Start" program graduated at the Central Training Center here June 26. The 229 men and four women in the class were trained by instructors from DynCorp International, a private military contracting company.

Jump Start is a police training program modeled after the focused district development police-reform program, in which Combined Security Transition Command Afghanistan is working to develop a professional, well-trained, fully equipped police force throughout the country. Jump Start focuses solely on the Afghan capital of Kabul and its 16 police districts.

"Jump Start is a process of reforming the way local police officers are trained," said Canadian Superintendant Ray Noble, Jump Start coordinator. "Jump Start picked the best aspects of FDD and utilizes those elements to train police forces in Kabul."

According to U.S. Army Master Sgt. Frank Miranda, Kabul Capital Police Command logistics coordinator for Combined Security Transition Command Afghanistan, these new police officers are better-trained than their predecessors.

"From Day One, they are taught police ethics. This type of training is also meant to remove the stigma of the police," Miranda said.

Noble, a native of Fort Francis, Ontario, Canada, and officer in charge of Prince Rupert Detachment, Royal Canadian Mounted Police, said applicants for the program must meet strict criteria before being permitted to enroll.

"These students are getting the message," Noble said. "They have been taught how corruption will not benefit them, and that it can even lead to increased violence against them. More importantly, we teach them if they follow their training and the rules, they will have the people's respect."

Jump Start students receive training in the use of firearms, combat tactics, first aid, self-defense, improvised explosive devices, human rights, and the tenets of the Afghan constitution.

"Our students are trained in all aspects of police work. They learn to handle civil disturbances as well as domestic violence," said Col. Hashim, Afghan National Police training deputy. "Our students learn to maintain checkpoints, conduct personal searches and manage crime scenes. They recognize this

is an important job."

Hashim said he is most proud of the four women in the graduating class.

"When Afghans see women in uniform, others will be encouraged to join," he said. "I am sure we will see many more women enrolling in the future."

Hashim, who oversees the training of various ANP programs including Jump Start and the Trauma Assistance Program, said all cities need a secure environment, and Jump Start will provide a valuable service to Kabul's citizens.

"Kabul is our capital city. With the capital buildings, the ministries of Defense and Interior and the embassies all here in Kabul, we need security," Hashim said. "If we have no police, we are not secure."

(Navy Petty Officer 1st Class Douglas Mappin serves in the Combined Security Transition Command Afghanistan Public Affairs Office.)

Today was a day of temptation and a test of growth and while I usually tell everything step by sep I am at work and really dont want to re-live everything..

There is a roomate living in the house and causing as much hell and torment as possible on his way out of the lease. This man is an electrician and up until a couple months ago he was ok to live with, but after losing his job he began drinking and cranking the music up as loud as possible and stealing food as well as leaving disgusting messes around the house. Life at home began to mirro the movie that melony griffin  and keifer sutherland moved in the man from hell.

So anyway long stoy short and as cry free as possible he threatened mee. He not only made threats but destroyed dishes. I of couse ran ou of he house while calling 911 and the rest is his-story. He was not only smart enough to get rid of the boken dishes but denied making any problems....well at least for the first 30 minutes until one of the five officers finally tripped him upo. He said it was an accident. Legally I knew before they came he would not be leaving, but I called anyway. After another 45 minutes of talking he told the officers he would not be a problem and would stay in his room. I left the house to pick up meds and upon retuing called the neighbor until I made it to my room to verify any occurances.( almost forgot I removed all the knives from the kitchen while officers were there and he decides to say to "hey what if she threatens me" of course they looked at him for the foul he was but that has me concened as well. Anyway i am on the phone and go to get ice he has thrown flour all over the kitchen as well as taking beans and rubbed hem over the oven. Idid not boher calling the police again I prayed and went to bed. I wake up to let Smokey and Nina Simone out and he has left the door to the kitchen wide open. I live in a nice area but there are no more crime free areas....anyone could have walked in and caused harm to me (then again not because of Smokey ).

I am taking a step outside I need you to pray for me,roomattes,my kids,the house and MIKE HOWARD. I don't want to offend anyone that does not belive in a higher power so I ask that if you dont just keep it moving and Ill be ok, but if you believe you know my prayers are needed......I hate o admitt it but I am afraid and in fear of my life.

Thank you