Cramps @ MindSay

I actually have a Happy Bunny t-shirt that say this.

When I first decided to go out with the husband (we'd already known each other for about a year) I was determined that if it didn't work out with him, I was going to take a break from the dating world for a while.  I was sick of the dating world by then and I had gone on string of dates from hell.  Finally, I just made a list of what I was looking for and what I didn't want.  I was going to be upfront and honest and tell him that I was looking for certain qualities in a man.

One of the things I told him was, "My daddy spoiled me rotten and I'm kinda used to it.  If a man can't spoil me on occasion, then I don't think it would work out between us." I know this sounded awful, but at that point I didn't care, I figure if he bolted, then I just weeded another one out.  Well, eight years later he's still here. :D

Today I was feeling like absolute crap!  I was doubled over in pain with a heating pad and downing Aleve.  Even though the husband was working today (he works from home) he was at my beck and call.  He went out in the rain and bought me lunch, rubbed my back, picked up the kiddo, helped her with her homework, took care of dinner and constantly asked how I was feeling. I didn't have to do a cotton-picking thing today. 

See there, sometimes it pays to tell people things right upfront. :D

So Basically I have this killer cramp in my neck....that I can't get rid of....help me.....Do I put an ice pack on it or will that just make it worse? or a hot rag?

.....plus I feel really shitty because the boyfriend is in Tennessee for a month :(

This weekend I had a lovely unwinding from the crap going on between Randy and I.  Won't go into that we are working on it.  The drama from my brother and Randy's sister.

 

My friend Sabrina invited the kids and I down Friday night and insisted we spend the night.  Granted she needed me to help keep an eye on her mother while she went and got her mom's antibotics and painkillers from the tribal pharmacy.  (Her mom had emergency surgery for a busted ulcer she didn't even know she had) but it was more along the lines to make sure Mamma Berdina didn't try and go against doc's orders while Sabrina was going to the Hospital!

 

I enjoyed myself even if I had to take the kids and dog with me.  The kids swam most of the day (Bree and her ol man have a pool), Bree and I relaxed and chatted with her mom.  We herded her chickens back into the coop three times because the kids kept leaving hte door open. 

 

We roasted hot dogs and marshmellows over a fire for dinner.  I normally don't drink much but Arjan (the hubby) came out and handed me a beer and said I know you didn't take your meds yet and you don't like beer but relax a bit already!  Arjan took over playing and watching the kids and Bree and I went beer for beer until about midnight where I went about two ahead of her!  Arjan left us to go to bed about 11 pm.  We had a grand time outside sitting next to the fire, talking, listening to the night time sounds, and remencing about high school!  "Got to nazsh out of my punonie!"  Aka Got to pee out of my coochie!:D  We were even copping sqats out by the tree line that lead to the corn fields!

 

I was so ripped!  It was great!  The last time I drank like that was when my boy was 3 months old and I had stopped breast feeding!  By the time Bree and I decieded to stagger our asses into the house it was about 1 am.  I drank a 12 pack of Bud Light and she drank 10 bud light.  We were hungry!  She had some Korean Noodles so we boiled up some water and ate some hot and spicy noodles while attempting to watch an American Haunting!

 

We both fell asleep in the first half and she staggered off to bed and I staggered off to her boy's bed since all the kdis were sleeping in the living room.  (Bree's lil 3 year old was the only one in her bed I take that back:D)  We both woke up about 8 / 8:30 and sat outside with our hangovers, coffee, and our asprin.  Nothing like having a hangover and then getting your period with cramps!  Bree's house is like mine in the monings.  MOM MOM What is for breakfast but we had sterio going on this time.  Arjan had left about 7 to go mow Bree's mom's place since she couldn't and about 9 am we stumbled into the kitchen and started making waffles for breakfast.

 

I helped clean up some of her house while the kdis were swimming again and left about 1pm yesterday.  Both Bree and I were in a lot better moods then what we started out with.  That is exactly what I needed was to get away from my own house for a while.  I cam home and my bathroom got scrubbed, my living room was moved around and cleaned from top to bottom.  The animal cages cleaned out and the dinning room cleaned from top to bottom.  Laundry started and the kitchen ready to be finished today!

 

I got ripped and it made me happy to be ripped!  A night away on the weekend helped get me motivated and cleared the cobwebs!

Ok, instead of the usual bitching I do every month, I decided to make the best of it and start a little game.  I will start and we shall see what original and funny things the rest of you can come up with...

 

Gentlemen you're more than welcome to play, but I highly doubt you can come up with anything really good.  Of course, you might just be very "in touch" with your feminine side, and I like being proven wrong, so have at it...

 

 

YOU KNOW YOUR CRAMPS ARE BAD WHEN....

1. You wake up with cramps, and immediately take two midol and an hour later it still feels like you were kicked by a mule in the small of your back.
2. Contributed by patchesmom  :  you know your cramps are bad when you have Dr Kevorkian on speed dial....
3. Contributed by loneshadow :  ...your husband has a black eye for telling you to not make a big deal over it.
4. Contributed by porkchopper :  You know your cramps are bad when you add an extension cord to the heating pad so you can move from your bed to the medicine cabinet!
5. Contributed by moosealot :  .you actually wish you had a penis instead. (Cause come on...what woman in her right mind would wish that upon herself! I still don't know how you men walk around with those things.)
6. Contributed by wonderingsoul :  You know the cramps are bad when you see those STUPID *feminine product* commercials that say "Have A Happy Period" and the next thing you know, you're shopping for a new tv.
7. Contributed by hereruraisins29  :  you deplete your normal stash and end up dipping into your secret chocolate stash........... and then depleting that.
8. Contributed by mamajo :  When you want to perform your hysterectomy yourself 'cause the dr. is too slow.
9. Contributed by myspacebarbroke :  When you go through a whole package of midol in 7 days.
10. Contributed by whispertales :  When you take your bloated self to the hospital and convince labor and delivery to give you a private room and an epidural.
11. Contributed by tearsandrain   : You know your cramps are bad when you make an appointment to switch from the pill to the IUD because you read somewhere it can stop your period all together!!

The human intestines contain a complex assortment of microbial organisms, healthy bacteria, yeast, and intestinal flora. These organisms work together to help the body absorb nutrients and repel foreign toxins. This relationship is symbiotic, benefiting both human beings and these intestinal organisms. Most people also have other organisms, called parasites, throughout their bodies, that are not as beneficial. A parasite is an organism that lives and feeds off of another organism, called a host. A parasite that makes its home in the human intestines can cause constipation, anal itching, diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, weight loss, anemia, malnutrition, cramps and more.

What Are Intestinal Parasites?
Intestinal parasites that remain prevalent in the United States include Enterobius vermicularis, Giardia lamblia, Ancylostoma duodenale, Necator americanus, and Entamoeba histolytica.

Enterobius vermicularis
This parasite is commonly referred to as pinworm or roundworm. It has the largest geographic range of any of the other parasites. Humans are the only known host for this parasite, and over two hundred million people worldwide are infected.

These parasitic worms live primarily in the large intestine, but eggs are often laid just outside the anus. This not only causes itching and irritation to the host, but it also increases the chances for transmission through shared toilet seat use.

The cellophane tape test is often used to confirm the presence of pinworms. This test consists of touching tape to the anal area several times, and then examining it under a microscope for parasitic eggs. The test should be conducted first thing in the morning on at least three consecutive days. This technique can increase the test's sensitivity to roughly 90 percent.

Giardia lamblia
This pear shaped protozoan is the cause of a wide variety of digestive disorders and gastrointestinal complaints. It is the most common parasitic infection in the world, and it is second in the United States to pinworm.

It is spread mainly by fecal-oral contamination, therefore it is more prevalent in countries with a poor sanitation system. It is resistant to the chlorine levels in normal tap water and survives well in cold mountain streams.

Giardia attach to the muscle wall of the duodenum and proximal jejunum and grow with the help if bile, carbohydrates, and low oxygen levels. They can cause dyspepsia, malabsorption, and diarrhea. Your health care provider can use special antigen assay tests called enzyme-linked immunosorbent assay (ELISA) or immunofluorescence to detect the presence of Giardia.

Ancylostoma duodenale and Necator americanus
A. duodenale and N. americanus are two species of hookworm that are found commonly in humans. Once these parasites enter a human host they travel through the circulation system until they reach alveolar capillaries of the lungs. Inside the lungs, the parasites climb the bronchial tree and are swallowed with secretions. Six weeks after the initial infection, mature parasitic worms will attach to the small intestine to feed, and reproduce eggs.

The blood loss caused by hookworms can produce a dangerous type of anemia. Fecal examination is the most common method of hookworm diagnosis.

Entamoeba histolytica
This protozoan is spread by poor hygiene practices in food preparation, and it commonly affects people who have a weakened immune system. Once ingested, these parasites hatch into trophozoites in the small intestine and continue moving down the digestive tract to the colon. They can also invade the intestinal mucosa and spread in the bloodstream to the liver, lung, and brain.

E. histolytica can cause digestive disorders, colitis, fatigue, weight loss, abdominal pain, bloody diarrhea, and fever. Fecal examination is the most common method of diagnosis, however the presence of amoebas may become negative after a year of infection.

Symptoms of Intestinal Parasites
A parasite can live inside its host for years without ever making its presence known. Or its may cause symptoms that are so vague they are difficult to diagnose. But the following symptoms may indicate an intestinal parasitic infection:

• Chronic diarrhea
• Gas and bloating
• Heartburn or chest pain
• Food allergies
• Sudden changes in bowel habits (from constipation to diarrhea)
• Gurgling, rumbling, or other stomach noises unrelated to eating or hunger
• Flu-like symptoms (congestion, coughing, fever)
• Unexplained weight loss
• Constant hunger
• Loss of appetite
• Anemia
• Bloody stools
• Sore mouth and gums
• Chronic fatigue
• Headaches

Preventing Intestinal Parasites
Parasitic infections can be avoided by wearing shoes, treating sewage, proper hand washing, careful sanitation, avoiding contact with infected persons, and consumption of bottled water and using the natural health product Para-Buster™.

Treating Intestinal Parasites
Treatment methods include proper sanitation, dietary changes, and using the natural health product Para-Buster™. Your natural health care provider will help you develop a course of treatment that works best for your condition. Follow your physician' s instruction exactly to treat and cleanse intestinal parasitic infections.