Barbeque @ MindSay

My weekend was awesome, and it's only halfway done.

So we had this major BBQ on the 3rd, because we had to be different from everyone who was celebrating on the 4th. I had my 3 closest friends come, and it was ~le shit~

We played cheesy board games, and my parents beat my siblings in beer pong. The best sight ever was my mother with a glass of zinfandel in her hand, she does this casual little throw and gets it in the last cup like nothing. And I ate so much. My dad cooked piles of delicious things, and there was macaroni salad, and there was cake, and there was apple pie, and there was onion dip.

And after going to bed at 1 a.m., my dad wakes us all up at 7:00 to go to the beach. We all wanted to go, but we were such zombies this morning. But we go over it, and got to the beach at about 9:00. It was where my dad used to go as a kid. I did beach stuff and got major sunburn on my back. Then my dad decides to make a makeshift volleyball "net" out of garbage cans and drawing lines in the sand. We didn't keep score (But everyone knows me and my dad whooped their asses, they just wont admit it)

Shit I love my family.

You know what hurts like hell? Being pinched by tiny little hermit crab pincers right on the skin between your fingers.

 

Tomorrow's going to be a big family fest... my grandparents on my mom's side are coming over. I do love my Grandma Dawn, the second half of my name comes from her, as well as my musical prowess. Bless the genes. She's such a nice person and a lot of fun to talk to, especially since I get to explain all the new technology to her. Poor thing needs internet.

 

In addition to that my uncle, aunt and two baby cousins are coming over as well. Jaden's a little handful, but I'm sure my sister can handle him. Ava is barely crawling so she shouldn't be an issue. I'd like to sit and talk with the adults if I can, rather than keeping the ankle-biters busy. There will be a barbeque out on the back porch which spells good times to me.

 

Anyhow, adios, until next time. Maybe I'll actually write in this thing more often.

 

- Paradox

Boo, the White Sox lost yesterday in Toronto.  And in extra innings, too.  :(

 

 

I wish the White Sox were home tomorrow; I'd love to go to the game.  I think that would be an awesome way to spend Memorial Day.  But they're in Cleveland, so there goes that.  :(

 

I think I'll spend some time at my parents' house tomorrow and have a barbeque.  It'll be nice to spend some time with them and my brother.

strange thoughts on this quiet morning in weeksville... a odd presence still lingers in my room, of thoughts and feelings left incomplete. confusion and uncertainty... fear and loathing... could this have happened for a reason? or am i just another nameless junkie, wasting away? as the sun continues to rise, and the mist clears, will too my answers? or will i be left in the abyss as my surroundings elevate around me...? left in this cold dark to be swallowed by oblivion...

well i'm not quite sure about all of that, but it was fun to write :) either way, i am still kinda confused about things... things that i do, and things that i feel... i'm not quite sure the meaning of some of these things... but i feel that there are somethings still incomplete with me... holes that i cannot fill with everyday materials... not drugs, nor people, or any other tangible thing for that matter. i doubt that these holes are to remain emptie forever, and i also doubt that i am the one that dug these holes in my life... i beleive them to have been there all along... and since i have holes, i tried to repair myself, like any human would... filling them with useless and meaningless materials... drugs, girls, work, possesions, anything that i can cling to and think about... i beleive that these holes are to be filled with knowledge... thoughts, inspirations, creativity, and other things that promote self-growth and a better life style...

uncertain in your taxonomy,
you wonder around, homie,

maybe i was talking about myself in that poem i wrote last night? its hard to remember, since i wasn't conciously writing that poem... i hadn't realized that it was soo.... um... like it is, until i read it this morning... but i like it... perhaps it crawled out of one of those holes that i was talking about... the holes that just never seem to get filled up no matter how much knowledge i put into them... and maybe thats a good thing? that these holes never fill up? stuff goes in there i'm certain, and it does stay there (i have a good memory) but they never get filled up... perhaps this is to inspire me to fill them? or to always leave me feeling emptie? HUM...

perhaps i pick up intangible things from everywhere i go, and everything that i do. Filling my holes daily with the knowledge (or by other means, some sort of information) that i come across. everyday growing and seeking to fill the holes in my existence. will i ever fill them up? or will they swallow everything i give them?