Bad Things Happen @ MindSay

It seems as though I have nobody to blame but myself.....No pointing the finger at anyone no scapegoats....I am just like my father and I let it happen. She scared of me...my temper....at how angry I can get sometimes, and even though it's never been directed at her only those that have tried to do she or I harm....she still can only wonder what would happen if she ever did have it directed at her. I'm not capable of hurting her at all I just don't have it in me. You never think that something could hurt that bad, and then when it does and damn near destroys ur world. I love her with all my heart and nothing less.....think back on ur most painful memory and thats prolly what I'm going through right now......it's changing me.....and I just dont know if its good or not

The more news you hear, the worse your outlook has to be; that's the case in my experience anyways.  The country is headed into a recession, right in the heat of the presidential elections.  Things are bad, and they will probably get worse.  Gas prices are at an all-time high and food prices are on the rise, while every day our standing in the international community takes a hit.  I'm not sure what the solution is, and I don't think any of these candidates know either.  Obama, Clinton and McCain certainly do not.  Obama and Clinton are busy fighting themselves and slinging mud, and when they are done on that front, one of them will just attempt to make things worse.  McCain is coming off to me as a guy who is losing touch with the age he is living in.  Yeah he is in his 70's, but with what he has been through in his life, his "realage" is probably in the 90's.  We are just going to have at least another four years of inept politics, and I think the main reason we have this problem is because of the dog and pony show that is partisan politics.

 

Maybe this system worked once upon a time, where old rich men wore bad wigs and supposedly had wooden teeth.  Of course I know that they did not really have wooden teeth, but the political system probably did not work the best then either.  For anyone to have a viable chance at winning election, they have to be either republican or democrat.  Sorry Nader, it just is not going to happen.  So they line people up on both sides of the fence, like a sports bracket, and let them fight for the right to go to the finals.  I don't see how this is the most efficient way.  Republicans were going to hate Hillary Clinton right off the bat for her political side regardless of what she was going to say.  Same goes for democrats.  It's a false dichotomy.  Republican or democrat?  Neither.  The system is outdated and in need of reworking.  Just here in Rhode Island, longtime Republican Lincoln Chaffee switched his affiliation to the democratic party after he lost in the recent elections.  Did his entire political philosophy change? No.  He knew that living in Rhode Island, you have no chance if you aren't running democratic.  This is because they have done such a wonderful job running the state to this point.  That exemplifies the problem with this system. 

 

Until it changes, we will have administrations that serve best when being divisive with their political affiliation counterparts.  Things may look bad now, but they will look a whole lot worse towards the end of the year, you can bet on that.  That's if you have any money left to bet. 

I don't know. After seeing you yesterday and knowing you lied to me about the cuts on you, I have lost a lot of trust in you. You act like it's nothing, and yet you know she is harming you. Why are you letting her do this? You used to bitch and moan at me about not listening to you. When I say you need to tell her something, you're like oh I already did but she didn't listen and you act like it's nothing. You ask if you would have a chance with me in the future. At the moment, you can forget it. I can't stand to see you with cuts all over your back, with hickies all over your neck. Why are you partaking in such stomach-wrenching activites? I'm sure I'm not the only one bothered by it. You tell me that her family is bad, as are some friends. Why in the world are you getting yourself into this situation then? I wonder sometimes if you realize this is a never-ending cycle and that you'll probably never get out now. But that is your choice. Yes, I've done some questionable things this past month, but they are not things that are leaving permanent marks on my body, and I am not getting into situations that I will not be able to step out of. This is what you want. This is what you get. You get an even bigger mess. Guess you should have thought about things. Guess you should learn to control your anger. I can't deal with your shit anymore.

 

As for me, I'm fine. You worry about me, tell me you hate Dave. You think he's a bad influence on me. He always asks if I'm okay, if I want to do something. He makes sure nothing happens to me. He's proud to hold my hand in public, maybe give me a little kiss here and there. He's not ashamed of me. He accepts me, doesn't yell, doesn't get mad. We talk, and laugh, and I know that he does not mean some of the things he said.. the difference in tone is clear, unlike you. He's not going to try to change me and tell me everything that's wrong with me. You never told me I was beautiful, that I looked particularly good one day, nothing. You always were like Sarah, you can't do blah blah blah. I don't want to see you get into trouble  with people. I understand you had my back, but you gotta let me make my own mistakes. People haven't seemed to have a problem with me or the way I am for several years, so what's your issue?

 

Thank you. Here ends the bitch-fest.

 

Yesterday, work was insanely busy. And hellish. Yes, I don't work in a fast-food job, but my job can be every bit as hell as yours. When people need their medicine and they can't get it, it's not a pretty sight.

 

I'd really like to see you tonight, babe.

hahaha, another post after nearly a year's absence...

In this year so many things happened... Tears, failure, accompanied by frequent gloominesses...I have gone through so much, if only I can see some good coming out of it..
why are some people so happy???

So I failed.. I really don't want to think about it, but I think about it all the time anyways.... Why is it such a big deal... prestige, everything else, yet that girl.. POO.. lucky??

It is all my fault though... I wish the same thing wouldn't happen in U of T, it's not a bad school really, but still...

It's time to start a new life, I still want to be me, only BETTER.

Sigh man one thing i think many of you can agree with me on..is comercails are soo desepctive in todays world.

 

Recently in my region of TX Time Warner Cable was bought out by Comcast. Well anyways my parents have fallen behind on the bill(i know thats happen to many of us). It was due next weekend.

They told me they just sent a payment to them yesterday and what happens this morning on a weekend?(this usaully happens on a weekday) 

They disconected everything! No call,no notice just bam! After geting for the first time in a week some decent sleep(its been bad with the weather latly if your in TX you know what im talkng about. i wake up to tell my parents about it. They didnt even know it and im like ..yeah they did.

My dad i swear..its soo hard to talk to him he belives hes always right.(im not saying im right on many choices i make too) Its ne of the main reasons i dont talk to him..and his word is law.

Anyways though to make this more messed up he outright refuses to call comcast to inform of the payment being sent and the fatc the DC was next weekend.

 

So he insists on changing services. But to me..is that the correct choice in the long term?

 

We have Version as a phone service and he wants to change to that for all our services. Thats cool but at the same time...get what im saying i dont know if it is the wise choice.

But if we did get i could FINNALLY talk to people long distance for free from in the US! :)

 

So im asking all of you!.

You the people on mindsay!!

Please.....I hope you ladies and gentlemen can help me out with this simple opinion. Is Verison a better choice to rely on? Send me your honest opinions everyone.

 

Thanks for your time . :)