Abstinence @ MindSay 
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to delve deeper, i'm concerned for the emotional well-being young girls duped into this ritual. of course when you're 5-10, you're convinced that you will remain abstinent. hell--at 14, i told everyone that i thought masturbation was a breach of my own abstinence pledge, and i didn't even attend a purity ball. the most damaging repercussion of this ritual is the inevitable guilt young women feel for their natural urges--even for undergoing puberty itself.
i should know. part of me still lives with that guilt.the fathers in the documentary said that they feel that women who don't remain abstinent have been "robbed." but i feel as if it's the other way around.
young girls are tricked into making a pledge to abstain from fulfilling urges they have not yet experienced. thus, as they develop, they begin to view their hormones as intruders of their pure being. it's the same sort of patterns young girls with eating disorders experience. society idealizes the proportions of pre-pubescent girls, so young women begin to resent their developing bodies.
i feel the same way about abstinence that i do about the drinking age; because drinking and pre-marital sex are taboo, young people engage in these activities in ways that are unhealthy--doing them for the sake of rebellion rather than for enjoyment or love.
i want my daughter to love herself at all stages of life, and to understand that the elements of those phases are natural. i want her to understand that sex is serious and to know the ways to protect herself. [one of the "purity girls" in the documentary became pregnant with the boy her parents allowed her to date--after "inspection,"--claiming she had never been educated on how to prevent stds and pregnancy].
i just wonder if those fathers have a hard time with the idea of their daughters as grown women. do they wonder at all the sort of damage their extreme protective measures have on their daughter's psyches? do
"purity girls" consider their own thoughts--their own selves--a sin?
that's what i call being robbed.
.My email to the editor of the local newspaper. An allegory, if you will--
.To Whom It May Concern:
.Although I now attend a university outside of Texas, I am still technically a resident of this city. I have a story for you that I believe you may find very applicable to something going on in our steadily growing city.
.The story goes like this… Once upon a time, there was a perfect country with perfect values in which nothing went wrong. Of course, nothing can be entirely perfect. Within the perfect country, there was a great fear and contradicting lust for something we ourselves may use every day: the car. “Cars are dangerous,” they said. “Our sons and daughters don’t understand them. They wouldn’t know how to use them. They’re sleek and fast and… Well I just feel wrong even talking about them! It’s something only for adults who know exactly what they’re doing and have a license to do it—a legally binding license.”
.Despite the general fear of the car, some brave souls still chose to drive them. The “pedestrians” would watch in disgust as a happy, young couple would whiz past joyfully. Secretly everyone wanted to drive a car—it was a natural urge amongst all mankind—but so many chose to remain on the side of the road. On the walk to school, children were told to just look away from the road. They weren’t to pay it any attention.
.As time went on, that became more difficult.
.You see, some of the younger generation had come to realize that cars were not all that dangerous if you knew what you were doing. Cars were now seen on all of the roads. They tempted people to drive at all ages. Cars were seen on television. Cars were seen in movies. Cars were seen in magazines, on the internet, and in their dreams. Cars were everywhere.
.But many suburban cities refused to accept this. “Don’t tell your kids anything about cars. If we tell them anything about a car, they’re likely to run off and drive one! That’s just sick… No, keep it to yourself.” There were antidriving commercials, antidriving classes, antidriving billboards… antidriving was even a new school policy supported by the president of the country. They would avoid the subject of cars entirely, refusing to acknowledge safety features such as safety belts, airbags, and antilock brakes. The new generation was to be entirely ignorant of the car. If they knew nothing about cars or how to protect themselves while driving one, surely they would never consider driving them or end up dying in a fatal car accident.
.This idea never really worked. Maybe it was safer to walk. Maybe it was sinful to drive so young. Whatever the case, their kids still began driving at younger and younger ages. If all you do is tell someone not to do something, it only makes them want to do it more. Thirteen-year-olds were stealing cars and having horrifying, paralyzing car accidents all over the country. “What’s a seatbelt?” asked one paralyzed fifteen-year-old who had been thrown from his joyride into a nearby tree. Alcohol was not involved. “How do you use the brake? And what exactly does that do?”
.No matter the numbers, statistics, and startling local deaths, the people of suburbia were not moved. “If we hold fast, things will change,” they thought. “If we start telling them about how to protect themselves—how to be safe—we will be admitting we were wrong and building an entire generation of early drivers.” And so nothing changed. Eventually, whether as passengers or drivers themselves, most of their youth perished in the plague of driving. They heard tell of whole continents on the other side of the planet dying for the same reasons. Still, nothing changed, and the perfect country wasn’t so perfect anymore. The end.
.Sincerely,
Socrates
.I'm going to post an excerpt from my favorite section. My favorite line is in bold and italics. While reading this, imagine it being read aloud by an overtly sexual woman clad in a ridiculous short skirt. And here is the section that is titled "You're Always a Sexual Person":
."Being Abstinent doesn't mean you stop being a sensual, sexual person. Sexual intercourse is only one way to express affection and sexuality. You might find that not having sex will make you appreciate your sexuality more fully. Choosing to be abstinent can give you the opportunity to explore other creative ways to express your sexuality and affection. Abstinence is a choice. It's a choice that can be made at any time. It can be a lifelong choice, or one that lasts until the time for having sex is right."
.There's nothing wrong with abstinence.
.Just with me.
OK so I'm not da most horrible person out there. I mean, yes, I really believe I'm starting to develop, & I do mean, DEVELOP feelings for that guy. The one from flashes .... Jonathan. I really do find myself liking him. And I think there's a strong possibility of him liking me back. I mean, I really, really do & that's really nice :D Now 'course this doesn't make me a bad g/f to Chris since I did, after all, give him da "green-lite" to go ahead with his life. And he DID say I should too. I mean, we're involved but not hooked-up. So I'm still available. And like we both agreed, we have certain needs. (Not in the sense u mite actually b thinkin;)) And Jay might be the one I need @ da moment.
Getting to really know him won't be miserable. I don't have to hook up with him, just be friends. I think. I just wonder if he'll get up da courage to actually come about to, like, maybe talking to me b4 school's out. .:LOL:. I'm thinking tho I can handle things. If push comes to shove, I have no problems going up to him & talking. Whether it's, "Hey, what's your name?" or the old trick, walking into him :) Someone has to make the 1st move, rite?
Oh, today in health class we also got our "Promise Rings" ..... Promising to not have sex until marriage & staying away from drugs & all that other "good" stuff in the eyes of an adult on the school board especially one from a program about Young Adults today & the "mistakes" waiting 'round da corner. The guys in my class got rings too, but only to see if it gets printed on da forehead after knocking someone out. .:LOL:. Like any of them actually has the guts to try! Well maybe some. But not all. Nah, actually none. Not in my Health I class anyways :p
As for weekend plans, ah, I have no clue. I'll finish up scenes 4-5 on Romeo & Juliet (I love that play) & then just kick back & chill. Tomorrow's what I like to refer to as, Saturday Movies Day. That's exactly what it is after all. All movies on all channels. Maybe, just maybe, there'll be something good on ;)
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