She finally had enough. Letting him go...

Well today was an interesting day.  I talked with Mike in lunch and he told me how i need to stop going for guys like ryan. and along the lines of me having to stop seeing myself as low that i dont deserve someone so amazing. something like that. cause if i see myself like that then thats all i'm gonna get. Thats true. True true.  I'm done with that. Screw it. Ryan isnt worth me crying myself to sleep.  Ryan isnt worth me getting angry and taking out my anger on everyone around me.  Ryan isnt worth me to stop my life and just sink in this little pit and just let life pass me by over the pain.  He's not worth it.  Hes not.  and He said it himself that he just likes me and thinks i'm a good person.  Thats it. I dont need a guy like Ryan in my life to just take what he can get and leave.  Screw that.  I need to get right with God.  I need to get right now.  Not this summer, not when i'm on my way to florida, NO. I NEED TO GET RIGHT WITH GOD NOW!!!!!!!!! at this very second.  This very moment.  I need to get on my face and repent for the things I have done and I need to start walking right with God cause I havn't lately.  And it takes alot in me to say that,  I need to stop holding on to things of the past thats hindering me from going forward.  Screw it all.  I have a life to live and I need to start living my life and start being happy.  I havnt been happy in forever.  Its about time for me to start.