i'm writing this post listening to etta james's 'dont go to strangers'. it's a chilly winter and being alone in this foreign city doesn't seem all that great at all.
i decided to start this blog (i shall call this the night blog since i run a day blog) out of lonesomeness. it's just difficult to be all yourself at the front line, telling the world (and your family and friends) how you truly feel and what's really bugging you in life. it's best shared with strangers and it's best kept anonymous.
i googled 'lonely blogs' and mindsay came up. i was hoping for, you know, 'special blogs' for 'special people'. but i guess loneliness is far too general and common for anyone to cash-in. which is supposed to be a good thing, right?
i just lost my only 2 english channels. i don't know what happened but when i rented this place, it was a given. now i'm stuck with over tens of chinese channels which i don't watch. thank goodness for the internet. i'm pretty sure now that those english channels (hbo's on of it) were illegal. run along.
the soup's boiling, and here i am, sitting alone in my apartment blogging about how miserable i am. i am on many social networks, even the local expat forums, but to be honest i'm just not in a good state of mind to socialize and meet people. maybe i'm just sick and tired of all these social meet-ups and for once, i yearn for something like this:
bump into a stranger on the street. he's cute, i'm smart. how we bumped into each other - well, maybe my book fell on the floor or something. then we proceed to talk and eventually got to the point where we're both foreign to this city and decide to meet-up for coffee.
things like that - real life, real happenings. not online.
i refuse to meet up people i meet online - i just don't think it works for me. i've tried, and it was never meant as dates. i'm just, not into these 'online' social crap.
so is that why i'm lonely?
jazz
