House Resolution 579 passed yesterday.

No, it isn't a bill which helps spread democracy in the Middle East while we fight the War on Terrorism. Or helping to rebuild levees in storm-ravaged New Orleans.

This was, apparently, much more important for Congress to discuss.

The House GOP Leaders pushed for passage of a bill to require protection for Christmas symbols. Because -- you know. War against Christmas is going on.  Far more important than anything else out there.

And it's a serious matter, this Christmas thing. When certain Democratic leaders asked that the House GOP add something in there to protect the symbols of Chaunkah?  They simply said "no."

Because -- I mean, hell! There aint no war on Chanukah, right?

So -- the vote passed overwhelmingly.  22 Democrats voted against the resolution. America and its esteemed leader, Bill O'Reilly, need not worry about this tragic (and completely made up) ban on Christmas.

I know. Many of you are proud that the House passed this -- taking some time out from these trivial issues like a Congressional budget cutting funding for social programs. Or this trivial War on Terror which pales in comparison to the War on Christmas.  But at least one representative had a little fun with the vote, reciting a poem on the House Floor -- effectively capturing the spirit of the reality of this heinous attack on religion in America.

And with that, I give you the words of Congressman John Dingell (D-MI)

'Twas the week before Christmas and all through the House,
no bills were passed `bout which Fox News could grouse.
Tax cuts for the wealthy were passed with great cheer,
so vacations in St. Barts soon should be near.


Katrina kids were all nestled snug in motel beds,
while visions of school and home danced in their heads.
In Iraq, our soldiers need supplies and a plan,
and nuclear weapons are being built in Iran.


Gas prices shot up, consumer confidence fell.
Americans feared we were in a fast track to ..... well.
Wait, we need a distraction, something divisive and wily,
a fabrication straight from the mouth of O'Reilly.


We will pretend Christmas is under attack,
hold a vote to save it, then pat ourselves on the back.
Silent Night, First Noel, Away in the Manger,
Wake up Congress, they're in no danger.


This time of year, we see Christmas everywhere we go,
From churches to homes to schools and, yes, even Costco.
What we have is an attempt to divide and destroy
when this is the season to unite us with joy.


At Christmastime, we're taught to unite.
We don't need a made-up reason to fight.
So on O'Reilly, on Hannity, on Coulter and those right-wing blogs.
You should sit back and relax, have a few egg nogs.


'Tis the holiday season; enjoy it a pinch.
With all our real problems, do we really need another Grinch?
So to my friends and my colleagues, I say with delight,
a Merry Christmas to all, and to Bill O'Reilly, happy holidays.
Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas."


Isn't he great? This Dingell guy?

Oh wait -- he ended up voting for the resolution anyway.

Oh well... we'll simply see how he votes when the Asarah b'Tevet resolution comes up...
 
   

 


Comment Page: 1 2   [Next]
 
AllAroundPsycho on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Oh wait -- he ended up voting for the resolution anyway.

Wha?  He did?  You shouldn't be allowed to be all snarky about how something is silly/stupid and then vote for it anyway.  This is upsetting.
tootboy on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
pretty humorous rhyme by Congressman Dingell.  However, it shows how out of touch this guy is.
Consumer confidence is rising quickly and gas prices are falling....
 
this from ABC News on Wednesday, "Consumer confidence has advanced slowly but steadily in recent weeks, this week reaching its best level in the last three and a half months.

How it ultimately plays into Christmas sales is unclear, but there's little doubt Christmas in October would have looked a lot worse. "

 

See?!  ABC News is out of touch as well.  It thinks it's possible for Christmas to be in October.  Won't that screw up everyone when schools are closed in December but the holiday was 2 months ago!  And will Christmas in October interfere with Halloween?  And does that mean Santa will arrive at Macys Columbus Day Parade instead of its Thanksgiving?

shiny on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Your little rant reminds me -- did you happen to catch SNL this past Saturday Night?  The "O'Reilly Factor" parody was quite funny...

-- S
tootboy on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
no i didn't see SNL this past week.
I know Hammond does a very funny O'Reilly with him reeking havoc will facts.
 
I will call ABCnews and tell them to notify their factcheckers about the Christmas calender
shiny on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
"Nice try, Peter Jackson.  It turns out that all I had to do was search the Internet and find that not only has someone already done this movie, but they also called it King Kong. If you think you're going to spin this one over on us, you're out of luck."

-- S
tootboy on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
i'm sure O'Reilly must've shown a clip of this on his program.  He gets a kick out of that kind of stuff.
I know in the past that he's had Darryl Hammond on his show so I'm sure they both have a big laugh over this.
shiny on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Whatever brings him ratings.

Or more sales of the "O'Reilly Factor No-Spin Coffee Mug."

-- S
tootboy on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
I take umbridge with the No-Spin Coffee Mug.
 
All Coffee mugs are made not to spin.  Otherwise the coffee would get all over the place.
By calling itself the No-Spin Mug it is degrading all the other mugs of the world.
 
superbreak2005 on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
I love the poem. But if I may get angry at this entire issue.....WHAT THE HELL WERE TGHEY THINKING PASSING SUCH A DUMBASS BILL?

I'm sorry Shiny. I really am. But I needed to let that out. I'm upset that they are taking this so far as to want to pass dumbass laws protecting Christmas while they're ignoring other more important issues. I can't believe this. And further more, it's unfair that they want to protect Christmas but they can't protect (Is it Hanukah or Chanuka?; I can't remember honestly), Kwanzaa, or any other Christmas celebration that people hold during this time of year. I may be wrong on that. I don't know. But it's like, you know....Why? What's the point? Why are they doing this?
shiny on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
I agree with you -- this is pointless. A "war" fabricated by individuals in order to gain political stance.

By the way -- there is no correct English spelling as it is not an English word.  The only real correct spelling would be Chaf - Nun - Vav - Kaf - Hey in Hebrew.

-- S
superbreak2005 on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Oh okay. I didn't know it was Hebrew. Awesome.
revcathian on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Isn't that a "yes, but under protest" vote? Silly. Write a cutesy poem to get himself out of a bind with those who will disapprove because he knew he was going to vote "yes" anyway. I'd rather he wrote something  full of diatribe and then voted 'NO'. It would be more honest. This is like Hillary screaming about the war, and then voting for it. These people all talk out of both sides of their mouths, which might be excusable if they admitted they were simply confused. But it isn't anything that innocent, I'm afraid.
shiny on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Is this better?

Rep. Bobby Scott (D-VA): "Madam Speaker, this resolution purports to protect the symbols of Christmas, but what really needs to be protected are not the symbols of Christmas, but rather the spirit of Christmas. The spirit of Christmas demands generosity and goodwill towards others. Instead of legislation that respects the spirit of Christmas, Congress in just these past few weeks has passed a budget that includes mean-spirited attacks on the least of us. For those who are hungry, we are cutting food stamps. For those who are sick, we are cutting Medicaid. For those who are in prison, we are imposing senseless mandatory minimums. For others we are ignoring increases in heating costs and cutting student loans. At the same time we are cutting those programs to help the least of us, we are cutting taxes for the wealthiest in society. Madam Speaker, we ought to express our passion for Christmas through deeds, not words; and we should not be distracted from our responsibility to uphold the spirit of Christmas as we consider the effects our actions on the Federal budget will have on the least of us during this holiday season. For these reasons I oppose this resolution."



He voted "no."  As did Gary Ackerman (D-NY) who also had some valid points said on the House Floor.



-- S

revcathian on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
Hmmm, perhaps it is finitely better. I would have preferred to see a colon, instead of a semi-colon when he described mean-spirited attacks on the least of us:

 

...Congress in just these past few weeks has passed a budget that includes mean-spirited attacks on the least of us:

 

Why does it matter? Less wiggle room for vague interpretation later. 

 

However, I believe he has the spirit of the situation in hand for the moment.

kyrianne on
Re: Dingell Bells (or "Cheer up, America! Christmas is saved!")
did they specify what the christmas symbols were that they were trying to save?

 

and don't they know that christianity flourishes best when it's persecuted?!  or maybe that's their point--try to make the religion seem underdog so that people jump on the bandwagon.


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