First things first.  BATHING is NOT an option! 

One must bath not only to look good but to smell decent and by the way it has HEALTH benefits!  Come on folks we aren't living in middle ages where we only bathed twice a year! Lets take a page from our ancestors and realize that bathing is good for your body and for other ppl's noses!

I swear the ppl in the town I live in do not know what water and soap are.  Let alone deodrant or body sprays/purfume/colognes are! 

Lets start with Ju Jutsu.  We are going to sweat and eventually smell somewhat nasty with working out, thus why I make sure I have deodrant on and even spray myself down with a body splash before I go.  Husband does the same thing.  The kids don't have to worry about that yet because they are 7!  But if you are a parent of pre pubesent boys and girls or teenage boys and girls, one must teach them to wash their ass cracks, their private areas, their armpits, and for hte girls under the tits!   Otherwise they are going to fucking reek to high heaven and have someone like me tell them they stink! 

I can give some leaway to the younger boys and girls, the prepubesent age, they are just coming aware of the changes in their bodies.  Meaning I won't out right tell them they stink but I will say something to their parents or even to the Sensi.  I go to Ju Jutsu to abuse my body NOT my NOSE!  There are two twin prepuberty boys in our class.  The first night they came to class one of them stank like rotten eggs.  I was gagging so bad and refused to stand anywhere near them.  I said something to Sensi.  Sensi politlely pulled mamma aside and said something to her.  Since then the boys have been really good about making sure to put dodrant on and are clean before they come to Ju jutsu.  But now we have a prepuberty lil girl there.  On top of it, well......no better word for it.....she is fat.  And you can tell by looking at her neck, face, and pudgy lil hands she doesnt' wash very well.  The smell of rotten cheese wafts through the gym.  I finally had it with the smell because it made me so sick to my stomach that I had to go throw up last Monday.  Sensi was to embarassed to say anything to the girl's mother because it was a girl and asked if I would say something.  I was more then happy too!  This is how the convo went:

"Excuse, Mrs. R.? 

"Yes?"

"Hi, I am Jackie B and I am a student in class along wiht your daughter."

"Oh nice to meet you."

"you too.  I have something I need to talk to you about concerning your daughter Z and Sensi asked me to talk to you.  Do you have a minute?"

"Sure.  What is going on with Z?"

"Well Mrs. R, there isn't a nice way to put this, your daughter reeks of rotten cheese.  I am not saying this to be mean but suggest that you maybe talk to her about washing up a bit before comgin to Ju Jitsu.  How old is she?"

"GASP!  What did you say?!?  And she is 9 almost 10!"

"I said she reeks of rotten cheese and I think it is because she is in the prepuberty stage and her hormones are starting to go a bit bonkers."

Just then Z walked up and her mother got a wiff of her. 

"OH DAMM Z!  You do stink!"

"Thank your Mrs. B.  I will talk to her."

Now this convo could have gone either way because yay I just dont' have any tact.  My nose was assulted and I have a very sensitive nose.  And when it comes to smells, I don't give a rats ass if I hurt your feelings.  You stink I am going to tell you especially if I can't stop gagging form the smell.

We go to the Fall Carnival tonight that the PTO put on.  First of all I am not a big group person anymore.  Becoming a stay home mom has led me to become a hermit and I rather perfer it anymore.  The smells of candy, kids, and the normal smells of a kiddie carnival wasnt' that bad and I tolerated that along with the rude ass adults.  The kids weren't as bad, they were rude but at least would turn around and smile at you if they bumped into you where adults just knocked into you and kept going.  Assholes.

But what took the cake is the fact at the "moonwalk", I was standing out of evreyone's away and kept moving out of everyone's way because I didn't want them touching me and two very nicely dressed women walk past me and stand in front of me.  I start gagging from the overwhelming stank of Body Odor!  I walk a lil ways towards a group to my left.........not them.  I walk a lil ways to my right where a group of ranchers/cowboys were standing in shit kickers.........nope not them........I had nobody behind me.  I very cautiously take a few steps to the front of me.........MY GODS it was ONE of the nicely dressed WOMEN!  I started gagging and Randy thankfully walked up with the kids and hurried me away after he got a wiff.  He knew I would have gone up and told them what deodrant was!

Then in line for the "Fishing Game" for the kids.......I started getting a wiff of rotten tuna.  That is right ROTTEN TUNA!  I knew it wasn't the first two ladies because they stank of rotten eggs, cheese, and week old grease.  This was  a new smell.  Of course Randy was out sneaking a cig and couldn't hurry me away.  I pinpointed the smell.  A young 20 something mother of 2.  Very nicely made up make up, causual clothes, and the stank of a well used whore!

As we slowly moved forward in our line, we got closer and closer to the lady and my kids were watching the mirade of emotions and the stank of her go across my face and asked me if I was going to say something to her.  YOU BET YOUR SWEET LIL TUSHIES MAMMA IS GOING TO SAY SOMETHING TO HER!

We got up near her and I literally pulled my shirt up over my mouth and nose......got a couple of odd looks from some ppl, some understanding nods from others........and then I turned towards her.......

"Mam."

"Yes."  With a puzzled look in her eyes with me holding my shirt over my mouth and nose.

"YOU STINK! Do you NOT know what soap and water is?  Or how about dodrant?  And you do realize that if you don't wash your vagina you get the rotten stink of tuna?  You are ruining my evening out with my children because you don't know how to wash your own body!"

Randy comes walking up with a horrified look on his face, he heard the last part of my lil tirad.  Some of the people including kids started snickering and others were looking at me like I had two heads.  I dont' care.  My nose was assulted with Body Odor and it reeked!

"Well!  HOW DARE YOU TELL ME I STINK!  IN FRONT OF MY KIDS NO LESS!"

"first, my nose couldn't take it anymore.  Second, do you want to continue walking around like your all that and smell of rotten tuna?  And third, dont' you think you owe it to your friends, family and own children if you bath once in a while and maybe set an example for your own children on how to bath? You don't like what ppl say to you in public then I suggest you bath once in a while!"

She walked away with kids in tow in a huff.  And I got a few smatterns of applause and Randy hauled my ass out of the Activity Center faster then you can say a Stick Up His Ass.

So again folks, BATHING IS NOT AN OPTION.  It is something that we all need to do!  Because if you meet up with a mean ass bitch like me and you reek of BODY ODOR, I am going to tell you if my husband doesn't haul me away in time.  Teenagers, prepubescent kids, those who work manual labor and young children I will give leaway to.  Their bodies go through the deodrants and scents faster then anyone elses.  And the fact some parents don't know how to teach their kids to bath.

So lets all use a lil soap and water tonight. Some deodrant.  And mabye even some of yoru favorite scent.

And the next time you run across some one with Body Odor do them a favor and SAVE OUR NOSES and tell them they stink!