He would not come with me today to go see a Championship football game that my nephew was playing in @ Ralph Wilson Stadium where the Buffalo Bills play.  He always says he will go and then always give me a hard time going and as usual this was again one of those times.  See if no one knows my husband he has a mental illness and he is not getting better but worse and I have a hard time getting him to even go to the doctor and counseling.  So anyways he just will never go places unless it is only his father, which is fine but he always gives me a hard time going places or even his other side of the family he will go but he will always say and complain he does not want to go.  Anyways I am just going on here but that is part of it.  He just lives in this bubble and I try and try to get him going and to help but obviously it is not working and he does not want to be with me.  So now he will have no responsibility and live this quite time over at his fathers and why would he even want to bother coming back.  I am afraid that is what is going to happen because he is not thinking right and he is not getting the right help.  So it will end up hurting us and the kids and they don't even know because they are at the nana's for a sleep over.  I came home and he was all backed and leaving. 

I just don't know even if he will bother coming back because he will see this care free single life again and he is just not the same person since this illness anymore.  I am just so tired of crying and sick of this hurt I feel and I am so afraid this is the beginning of the end.