"Oh my beloved ice cream bar, how I love to lick your creamy center. And you're oh so nutty chocolate covering. You're not like the others, you like the same things I do. Wax paper, en foiled football leather, dog breath, we're not hitchhiking anymore, we're riding."
"Stop it, you're talking crazy"
"Oh no, I know what you want, you coveted my ice cream bar."
"Come on now"
"No you don't. You can't take it from me now, I've had this ice cream bar since I was a child. People always trying to take it from me, why won't they leave me alone!"
"Easy now"
"BACK OFF MAN! Don't make me use this, I'm warning you. Now you've done it, you've forced me to use it. I'm hurting"