Senior Prom, a rant, and a love story

Alrighty....so my Senior Prom is right around the corner and I've bought mine and Kyle's tickets...but I have a feeling I'm going to have to fight to get him there. The prom ticket nazi is saying that the oldest age date you can have at prom is 20...but according to the Student Code of Conduct that's a lie. The Student Code of Conduct clearly states and I quote :

 

"All guests must be in at least the ninth grade and NO OLDER THAN TWENTY-ONE YEARS OF AGE. All guests who are not juniors or seniors must submit an application for approval. A charge must be paid once the date has been approved."

 

I have no problem paying for Kyle. It's my prom after all. But I do know that he will be there no matter what. Hell, I'll get him a fake ID that says he's still 20 if I have to. But my boyfriend will be at that damned prom!

So as far as the dress, I thought I found the perfect dress....it's absolutely gorgeous. It's in Camille's and it's this light/baby blue color and it goes all the way down in back but in the front it's cut up to the knees and it does this cool criss cross thing with the straps in the back and they cross perfect in the middle of my shoulder blades. But I mean, reading of the dress code it says no backless dresses....and this dress is backless. Should I listen? Cause no one did last year and you know some people won't this year...right?

 

In other news...I thought about it last night...and as soon as it's possible I'm going to move out. I'm going to get a job, probably with Wal-Mart so that I'll have insurance in case my parents decide to be bitchy about it, and I'm going to get my own place, with roommates, or if Kyle's found a place and he doesn't mind, I'll move in with him. Of course no matter where I go I'm going to help pay rent and have job and all. I'm going to ask my parents to sign the car over to me as an 18th birthday present so that it will be MY car. I'll find scholarships and get grants and loans to pay for college. I'll do what I have to...but I'm tired of not having privacy....I'm tired of having to deal with my brother and my parents, their favoritism and sexist views....and I'm tired of having to do everything for everyone and still it's never enough for them.

 

My dad found out I'm on BC. How much he knows I'm not sure it was a conversation I was too upset to have at the moment. My mom told me that he found out but the way she did it made me snap at her and tell her off about my constitutional right to privacy...even in "their house".

 

Last week I didn't go to soccer because I came home and did dishes and cleaned the floors. I thought I'd be nice and do that for them since everyone is so stressed out right now. Well, I did the dishes twice that week and then I turn around and my mom tell me Friday night as I'm walking out the door with Kyle that I have to do the dishes tomorrow. I'm like okay whatever. Well, I did them and the floors again on Saturday. What does Clayton do? Tries to bring the dog through the effin house after I've cleaned the floors and then throws his nasty dirty shoes on my clean floors to be a little bitch about it. You know what my mom says to him? "Clayton pick those up." And walks out the door to fuckin smoke! YEAH I HOPE MY KIDS HAVE TO DEAL WITH A GRANDPARENT WHO'S GOT LUNG CANCER! NOT! But they probably will the way my parents are going. And they just let Clayton do whatever. With me they're always calling and asking where I'm at, what I'm doing, who I'm with. It's like they have to know every fuckin thing.

 

And I'm just sick of doing everything around here. I feed the animals and play with them. I clean my room, the dishes, the floors, I go to the store when they ask me to. I get good grades and I do all kinds of stuff for them, but do they care? No. That's why I refuse to learn how to do laundry. Cause the moment I do they're gonna expect me to do it. Gawd, they'll probably even want me to cook for them if I learn how to cook. I'm going to have to eventually....probably soon if I'm going to move out when I turn 18, but I'm not going to do that for them when I do learn how. Fuck them. I'm not their fucking servant.

 

The only time I'm ever happy anymore is when I'm out with my friends, including school, or out with Kyle. I mean, when I go and hang out with my friends it's like none of that matters and I'm just able to relax and have a good time and rant about teachers that  completely bite with them. When I'm with Kyle, it's like there is nothing else but that moment. The other night after we went out with Kayla, BJ, Sam, and Erica....we went back to his house and just slept until I had to go home. I've never been so happy to just go to sleep. I loved it. I love just lying next to him. Jake said it was one of those picture perfect moments and if he'd had a camera he'd have taken a picture of us like that. And yesturday we went ice skating and when the Snow Patrol's "Chasing Cars" came on...he took me out to the middle of the rink and just started dancing with me. Gawd....it was amazing. He's so amazing. I mean, can you see how things like that would make me forget about everything that's wrong and just get lost in him and his voice in my ear singing to me? And we even helped this little kid to ice skate for his first time! We took him around the rink twice and it was just so adorable. Don't worry it wasn't just some random kid, his church had rented out the place...but it was just adorable watching the little kid try to skate and Kyle tryin to teach him. I know he's going to be an amazing dad someday. Hopefully to my kids.... To be honest, if he asked me to marry him right now I would. I know that's a ways off, but right now, I'd say yes...and I don't thnk that's ever gonna change.