There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so. -- William Shakespeare


The Moms.

Okay. So I spoke of a pair of girlfriends planning for a baby…

I commeneted on a status of theirs saying Something along the lines of "You guys are SO LUCKY! You get to hand pick your donor! Not all of us are so lucky! Its heartbreaking watching my son suffer through his fathers eczema! I constantly worry he's going to develop asthma like his father as well and have to suffer the rest of his life and Not be able to do the things he wants to because of it! (Don't even get me started on the alcholism. I still have a few years to worry about that though!)"


It just so happens that their donor has every quality I just mentioned as well. The towns people think he's a crackhead because he has sores on his face from his eczema...

... She is still going through with it. She replied saying she would take it into consideration.


WHY DO PEOPLE SET KIDS UP FOR FALIURE?! This is completely selfish to be so adamant about wanting a child that you risk certain health issues. 


Oh well. I put my concerns out there..  *sigh* At least if the child has mild eczema like Daniel I can guide them in the right direction. Trust me, you don't want to put lotion on a child that stings on broken skin. I've cried after watching Daniel shake from the pain.






morte on
Re: The Moms.

this is why i choose not to have biological children. i know how many genetic issues to pass along...but unfortunately, since i’m a woman, i don't know any better and will probably change my mind, because women are just so silly! 

fuck medical “professionals”...if i were a dude, i would have gotten a vasectomy YEARS AGO and everyone would have applauded me for making good, thoughtful choices regarding genetics. 

insanereid on
Re: The Moms.


From a medical standpoint, I might understand if perhaps the procedure was generally avoided because of health risks or perhaps even if it simply cost more, just because (I imagine) its a more invasive procedure.. but that's not the case. Its because of some old school expectations. Considering how many children are in foster care and will never be adopted, sterilizing women should be more of a norm. (Not saying its the women's fault, just saying if they change their mind, there's plenty of children who need a stable adult) 

morte on
Re: The Moms.


and honestly, i have always been of the mind that people who really want to be parents should be able to love a kid who isn't theirs biologically.  i mean, whats the difference? the kid could be 100% yours and still not look or act like you, so why not help out someone who actually needs a home instead of creating another human? 

but yeah, its definitely the fact that women are STILL treated like potential baby farms, and the shitty patriarchal side that promotes the false concept that women are less logical than men, and therefore shouldn't make long lasting decisions on their own :/

insanereid on
Re: The Moms.

If we're so naive and stupid... Shouldn't the option be more readily available to us?I mean.. Obviously we can't live without a man to take care of us and provide for us and the number of "men" willing to do so is dwindling..

Ugh. I feel like we could rant for days on this subject.

I've always thought that in order to actually have a child people should be required to take classes and prove they are caring and selfless enough to do so. If someone REALLY REALLY wants a child they should have to jump through the same hoops that someone who would want to adopt would.

After already having a child, I've thought I'd be more than willing to be a surrogate for someone who is unable. As far as having more children of my own, I don't think I could handle it again.. But to give someone else that option, if they proved worthy, I probably would.


morte on
Re: The Moms.

definitely could rant for days on this topic lol and i totally agree with you about the classes, and the hoops. it kind of kills me sometimes that the SIMPLEST way for me to have kids is to make them, despite the fact that it would be intentionally passing on my shitty genes, thus proving that i make bad decisions...on the other hand, if i try to adopt, it will take years and lots of effort, plus they want a better answer than, “i don't want my own.” like, something should be physically wrong with you if you don't want to birth your own, or bring new humans into the world (surrogate). 


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